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when my son was a baby i dressed him in yellow ( as its my fave color ) greens,blues. Now its jeans,he has alot of different colored tops. but most are blues,reds and browns.
he has his sandals they re just sooo cute but he loves them. i think itd be funny to see my son in a dress i think he'd look cute lol
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Just to add my thoughts on baby clothes:
Because I had a DD first I had loads of her used baby clothes. And I didn't hesitiate to pop my DS that followed in anything that both fitted, was comfy and not going to raise eyebrows while out shopping LOL so he wore lots of clothes that are what I guess most people would consider to be gender neutral... I recall bottle green, burgundy, white, orange and purple being predominant. However at night I would happily pop him into a pink Bonds grow suit if that's all was left in the drawer. Didn't phase DH either although we did have a bit of a giggle. It really was no biggie.
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i think part of the issue is perception from those around you. i mentioned to my SIL when i was only about 8 weeks pg that i'd like to get some nighties as well as sleep suits - it didn't seem to gel that boys (as babies) would wear a nightie
i have no issue in crossing "the line" color wise - i've deliberately looked for blue and other colors that are typically boyish, and would look for similar for a boy (i KNOW BW's boy has a bright red suit somewhere!) - but i think part of the issue is in HOW feminine something is, and the fact that, as a baby, they have no say in their individual likes. htere are some things that are just feminine, and i wouldn't choose to put them on a boy myself.
having said that, Gremlin has pink and purple sleep suits - and if we were to have a boy, he'd wear them to sleep too! that part doesn't worry me cos the cut isn't feminine kwim?
can't see myself putting a lacy pinafore on a boy for any reason (unless he was into the arts and it was costume - my bro has worn some VERY feminine stuff!) - particularly as a baby!
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To be perfectly honest, 95% of DS' clothes thus far have been hand me downs from my friend's little boy and my nephew so I haven't actually chosen them as such (although there is stuff I don't like and he hasn't worn). I have actually only had to go out and buy him a handful of outfits.
But he wears pretty much every colour: black, brown, blue, green, red, yellow. He has nappies (mcn) in every colour but pink I guess, including purple, red, orange, yellow.
I wouldn't buy pink for him but if he chose something when he was older that had pink in it, I can't see that would phase me too much.
Are sandals an issueI had no idea about that! As long as they were blue, black, brown, any dark colour I'd put them on him I think?
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One of Alex's fave things to wear for a while was his sister's silky princess printed nightie.I didnt mind, DH was a bit "reluctant" about it but his family, OMG what a fuss they made about it not being right.
We also have lots of photos of him wearing fairy and princess dress ups because to him that was the most natural thing to do especially with a big sister prancing around in them.
As a baby I also used up a lot of his sister's hand me downs and he regularly wore pink jumpsuits around the house and to bed. DH and I didnt really see a problem with that, altho upon saying that I would change him if we left the house.He did wear quite a bit of yellow and green outside the house tho.
Now as an "older" boy he wears blues, greens, reds and a bit of black, brown and grey. He has at least one purple top too. There really isnt a lot of deviation choice wise out in the shops anyway if you wanted to dress him any differently.
He also wears little leather sandals as well as his fave spiderman ones!
I dress my boys in bright clothes, i love greens, orange, reds, purple.
I'm constantly disappointed that the generic fashion is lots of brown, grey, royal or pale blue, navy. And i absolutely loathe the baggy knee length shorts, i wish they still made proper shorts for boys, not military skater style. (though lenght is handy for protecting knees from scrapes), the cuts though could be so much nicer.
I don't buy pink because i hate pink for myself. But if either boy wanted something in pink i wouldn't mind, in fact i encourage my toddler to choose what he'd like to wear.
I prefer he wears sneakers over sandals, only because they are a perfect fit and more supportive on his feet, and i'm very pedantic about shoes that fit properly. Many of the sandals in stores have soles way too hard for little growing feet. But if we are at home or outside our home he goes barefoot.
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ooh, i did want to add - i have NO issues at all with putting little boys (babies etc) in hand knitted cardis/jackets - as old fashioned as that is! from the day i found out that all was ok at 8 week scan, i was hunting for someone who made matinee jackets - i just think they're so cute for babies! i have found it so hard to find anything like that when looking in shops - so have found people to make them for me!
I love anything handmade or knitted. I find that if you trawl the WAHM sites you can buy vintage looking stuff because its hand made. Plus you're supporting local industry. That's how where i like to buy the boys clothes and toys.
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Oh BG i wish i'd known!
My Nanna makes the knits the most beautiful little baby cardigans. I have about 5 from when DS was a baby!
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Bath - I avoid all the licensed stuff too. The quality just doesn't seem to be there.
I dress DS mostly in red! He is half Jamaican and has beautiful coloured skin and black curly hair. If he wanted to wear pink, i'd let himHe loves wearing all my bracelets and my mums beads! He puts them on and we say "oh be-yoot-iful" and he loves it!
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i only have one at the moment - a beautiful white one i was given for baby shower - mum has found a pattern she is thinking about making one with a matching blanket for Gremlin's baptism.Oh BG i wish i'd known!
i don't know why i love them so much (maybe cos i used to sit and watch my nan make these beatiful intricate cable jackets with her arthritic old hands!) - i just think that dressing a baby as a baby sometimes is really worth it - they grow up so quickly...
ooh, i lie - the local hospy sells little cardis to raise money for fundraising for neonates - mum bought a pink and an apricot one - i think the apricot one will only ever fit on dolls for Gremlin (it's tiny but so sweet!) but she does have a little pink one as well
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I've got five girls, so when this one turned out to be a boy, I wondered how much fun I might have going and buying "boy clothes". I've always loathed that little girls' "fashion" has always been so stereotyped. I thought there might be more freedom in the boys' sections.
How wrong I was! A sea of dull colours, with "boy" motifs, a preponderance of blue with the odd splash of red or whatever... I became quite depressed after a while. It felt like boys' clothing was even more constrained than girls' clothing. I'd already been getting a lot of comments about What Boys Are Like, and I felt quite defensive that this little mite should turn out the way he *wants* minus pressure from everyone else.
I live in a community that is extremely gay friendly and has a lot of transgender people and it is always so foreign to me to hear the comments of almost fear, I guess, when people contemplate their kids wearing clothing that isn't appropriate for their gender, but that fear doesn't seem to move so close to something like disgust or anger as when it is about little boys wearing dresses or skirts or whatever. I don't understand what people think it says about a son who might like to wear "girlie" clothing, although I should since my 11 year old is constantly called a "tomboy" because she doesn't like girlie clothing.
It's not just the clothes, either - it's the toys. I had a friend once whose husband *refused* to let their ds play with any "girls' toys" like kitchen stuff or dolls. He sincerely saw it as a threat to his son's masculinity.
It's like this pressure right from the moment they are born to tell them, "This is how you will behave. This is who you are. You cannot escape it and we will remind you at every turn."
I do wonder what would happen if I had a son who lived in a family who expressed horror at the idea of a son being dressed in "girlie" clothes who felt drawn towards them naturally, and how he would respond to that kind of pressure to deny that part of himself. I imagine it would be so much worse than my dd being called a "tomboy" because at least there's some kind of patronising acceptance of a girl who doesn't act like a "proper" girl.
Its funny as I was only thinking this morning how "ordinary" boys clothes are at the moment. Im trying to buy DS winter gear and it is sooooooo boring, everything seems to have some cartoon character on it or is blue or green. I love seeing him in bright colours and was so sad to discover he has outgrown his yellow and red shirts. DS loves dressing up in my stuff and currently has nail polish on both of his big toes, he wanted it I dont see why not.
Sandals, i love them and DS always has at least one pair.
In response to the questions
Inappropriate clothing for me is when "fashion" tries to put adult styled clothes on children. I would class red as a masculine colour, but i have no problems with DS wearing any colour he wants and he has had clothes in just about every colour including pink and the same goes for DD as well, though i am trying to increase the black atm.
If DS wants to wear dresses and pink then thats fine with me but as Brontide said I would let him know that some people might find it unusual.
Stores generally appear to be limiting in choice especially this year, there seems to be too much focus on supplying items with Thomas, Ben 10, Bob the Builder and the list goes on, but then again if the consumers didnt buy them they wouldnt stock so much of them.
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When we were little, Mum had all us kids in nighties (boys and girls). It was easier to do nappy changes. All of us wore tights during winter (as little ones) because it kept us warm. We all wore sandles, but navy or white were girl sandles and brown were boys sandles.
I do a lot of sewing for friends baby's and try to use gender neutral colours (not always easy). Some friends i know will dress either gender in purple (or another colour with purple), but others would not go purple for a boy.
It is not always to easy to buy clothes or toys if you are trying to avoid characters or trademarks (disney etc), but i always try to.
The majority of my clothes have come from the mens section, because i find them more comfortable.
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i have no issues whatsover with clothing, but at the moment, my 2 yo son has his finger and toe nails painted red.
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Morgan: excellent point about all the licensed clothing (Disney, Thomas, Superheros etc) I actively avoid it... correction: I did buy my DS a pair of Ben 10 thongs but only because they were on sale... heavily reduced down to $3 and we were on holidays... so glad I didn't pay any more for the stupid things... the picture of Ben rubbed off after about 2 wears!pfft! Licensed stuff is usually rubbish!!! And I also am very adverse to my child being a walking advertisement... a walking billboard almost... for a media company. I think it's inappropriate to get children sucked into that kind of consumerism so early... it just sets them up to have a warped perception that your clothes need to define you in a necessary way... so that they grow up to need it... and that unlabelled clothes won't do... and of course soon they will strive for higher and higher status labels... today it's Disney tomorrow it's Dolce & Gabbana (sp?) Personally I think it's the wrong message... JMO.
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DS is only one so at the moment he wears what I put him in. We live in the north so it's always warm and standard dress for him is shorts and a singlet. If we go out it might be nicer shorts and a shirt and thats it. He doesn't own shoes and I won't put him in any until he is a bit better on his feet, even then it won't be for long as I believe the best thing for growing feet is freedom (can see how this is not an option in cold areas). He wears several singlets that have pink writing on them and I couldn't care less. Once he is bigger he can wear what he wants, I am a big believer in self identity and expression so if he wants fairy wings and gum boots he can have them, likewise if he wants camo pants and thongs. Life is too short to worry about stuff like that I think so we may as well have fun.
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WITHOUT reading more than page one - I'll edit if needs be!
For me, DS wears whatever he wants. He had a Christening dress. My favourite clothes for him as a baby were brown dungarees with a blue long-sleeved body underneath or his gorgeous cream-burgandy-orange-brown "forest friends" clothes I picked up in Austria with a pair of cream/beige cords. I'd dress a girl exactly the same, except for maybe a pink long-sleeved body under the dungarees.
I didn't dress DS in a slightly "girly" outfit (brown with a bit of salmon-pink and orange in... which I'd bought as being fairly neutral) because the evil midwife (the Fat Controller one) kept calling DS "she" all the time because "I just guess and I'm usually right". Evil cow! DS was a BOY and I was desperately trying to bond with my much wanted baby and I was thrilled I had a boy, I really wanted a boy... and there's her calling him a "she".
But otherwise, I know DS picks to wear pink hats and that doesn't bother me. Pink is a colour which can sometimes look good on DS, depending on the shade. He looks better in deep reds, browns and beiges, oranges, dark green, dark blue, sky blue (but NOT medium or baby blues) and cream. And some pinks, but not baby pinks. Dusky pinks look great though. The odd bit of white, but not too much. He has been dressed in these colours since he was a baby. Because he looks good in these colours, nothing to do with boy/girl. He inherited mostly my colouring, which I'd bought for anyway.
DS also plays with putting on make-up, brushing hair, the toy dressing table at Nursery, loves playing at cooking with me... but mostly loves playing trains. That's who he is, we didn't force any of that. I'd be happy with fewer trains tbh!
Yes, I'd let DS wear pink, if he wanted. But for his first year everyone assumed he was a girl even when I did blue-overload just because I am happy with my boy and want people to not assume he's a girl! Hasn't happened for almost 9 months now, so there's a lot less blue in his wardrobe now LOL. No black because it doesn't really suit him - but I did bemoan the lack of black when I had to take him to a funeral.
ETA: no sandals because in the UK, even in the summer, it's too cold! That and they just aren't as good for the feet. Hand-me-down shoes I refuse. Not because we couldn't do with them, because of the damage second-hand shoes cause. PLEASE don't damage your babies' feet with second-hand shoes. It's a "pet" of mine so I'll not go into full-on soapbox mode but PLEASE don't do it. I've also seen some funky pink shirts/ties for DS but they weren't the right shade. He has some great shirts and I love him wearing them. But in the correct colours! DS also wears my jewellery and DH's jewellery, not an issue for us. The only time I say no is when I catch him with expensive stuff or when he's gotten into my Elizabeth Arden make-up (again... he loves the magnetic closing) and trying to put it on and I just can't afford to lose that powder! Here - have the cheap stuff! He loves doing his lips so much he has his own stick of lip-balm (so you can't see it all over his jaw LOL).
I'm sure DS has a pic up on facebook of him wearing a t-shirt my sister bought him that he has only just grown into... he was about 4-5m old and loving wearing something which looked like a dress.
As for character clothes... I have a "no character" policy. Which everyone ignores. So DS has the odd igglepiggle and a few Thomas trains. Big deal. He has Thomas socks and Roary socks and IgglePiggle pyjamas... no big deal. But he has no going out clothes with characters on and that's the way it will stay. I won't object to him picking Thomas pants though to encourage toilet training... not that I really have to encourage that LOL. I did refuse character clothes my mum bought because she knows my policy... she took them back. And agrees now that DS looks better with a moose on his top than yet another Thomas.
Last edited by Ca Plane Pour Moi; March 12th, 2009 at 08:07 PM.
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