After getting married young and separating at 31, I was single for most of my thirties. I hadn't really thought about children or how many I wanted in my twenties but realised time was running out when I was in my mid-thirties and single.

After having DD1 at 38, I wanted heaps more but it took me a long time to recover from that pregnancy/birth. I was virtually housebound for six months after her birth because I couldn't walk very well and am still feeling the effects five years later.

My second pregnancy was even worse physically - was in a wheelchair and had gestational diabetes to boot.

The only way I could have another baby is to wait until DD2 is around three years old. Physically, I can't lift or carry DD2 for very long which is troublesome when there are definitely times when I need to lift/carry her.

If it wasn't for the physical issues, I think I would have had three by now. Despite my age, I got pregnant both times within a couple of months of trying.

How do I reconcile myself to this? I just think back of the lonely and worrying times in my thirties when I didn't think I would have ANY children and that makes me feel incredibly blessed to have two.