I tried to put it in my court. I would say to IL's - OMG I gave Jenna *this* the other day, and you should have seen the tantrums!!! Or she broke out in a really bad nappy rash.

I turned it on myself giving them the *bad* things, and they tok notice that way and made some minor alterations. Not alot, but at least there was a gesture.

The only other thing to do is to take your own food when you visit, and I suspect that will cause more offence than simply saying something.