I'm with the PPs chick, it is not ok for him to speak that way. Not in a fight, not ever.
Marriage is not about belittling or name calling.

I have suffered rather severe AND and anxiety, so I really do get where you are coming from. Yes there does sound like there could be a contribution from AND there, but the rest is not helping at all.

Who is your care provider? Have you had a chat to them about all this? Sounds like you could do with a fighter in your corner.