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Thread: Would you be upset

  1. #1

    Post Would you be upset

    I'm getting so upet with MIL and to be honest i shouldn't let her get to me as she lives in the UK it's not like i see her all the time.

    When we found out i was pg with this bubs we waited till 12wks to tell the families as of my previous m/c. Just after telling her we found out that we was hig risk for the baby having down syndrome. We told FIL but heard nothing from MIL about it. When we got the results i emailed everyone i knew and told them what had been going on and i had some lovely emails back we got nothing back from MIL.

    When ever she emailed after that not one word about me or the new baby. Then when i was in hospital DH emailed and told her we got a few emails back and then she stopped asking.

    After last weeks drama of being told i have low fluid around the baby i thought i would email her and let them know what is going on. I also asked how they all was and what was they doing for Christmas. In the reply she said NOTHING about me or the baby not one mention of it she just went on how they where spedning Christmas working and that the ducks got eaten by a fox etc, etc.

    DH thinks she is like this because they can't afford to visit as they made the biggest mistake a couple of years ago with moving to a new house that need a lot of work doing on it and also MIL does not know how to stop spending.
    But i don't care if they can visit or not i would just like them to take notice of the new baby. It's gotten me to the stage where i don't want him to even tell them when she is born and send no pictures.
    Also she has never asked if we know the sex and she knew we asked with Alex and they knew that.

    Sorry for the moan but last night it just really upset me.


  2. #2
    kerry Guest

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    Maybe she just doesn't know what to say and is taking the approach of less said soonest mended, not realising that less said is greater damage in this case.

    Wish I could offer more. I say give less energy to her negativity and all your energy to dh and the kids, those here and she that is still cooking..

  3. #3
    lindie Guest

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    Hi Michelle,

    It is really hard when you feel like you and baby are being ignored, Just a quick note though, sometimes women dont reply or respond during the pregnancy because deep down there can be a little bit of jealousy (those baby addicts) (like myself....LOL) who want or wanted more, etc... that just want to pretend its not happening, And are totally fine once the baby is here because you are no longer pregnant? if that makes any sense.
    Another one maybe like a member of my own family, they just dont say much as they think you are overacting about your pregnancy and feel like "heh no one gives me attention?" and so wont give you anytime because they feel like the spotlight is not on themselves???

    Not too sure if it is any of that but....I too have had similar and you know what, Bugger them if they cant share in your worry and or joy then dont worry too much about that person or like I did just keep putting in Quip like next email:

    Oh Michelle and (the baby you wont mention) are great at the moment.....and so on.

    Maybe that will catch her eye.

    Hope this helps Michelle and keep your chin up, dont let it get you down and Pregnancy hormones will make you feel more emotional about it!

    Lindie

  4. #4

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    If MIL hadn't had 3 of her own then i would say she was jealous that we are having a 3rd. But it was also her reation when we told her that i was pg with this one all she said was "blow me away, when is it due" and then went on to say to DH that he will need to have the snip. That was the first thing that upset me over all this.
    She wasn't like this when i was pg with Alex she wanted to go out and buy things and also was out visiting 2weeks after he was born she arrived on his EDD hoping to be here for the birth.

    I am thinking more that it has to do with not being about to afford to come and now it won't help because my dad is coming out again for his second trip in 9months.

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