We sound so similar. I too am a bit of a drama queen and my DH is so chilled.
DD has alwasy been a super chilled kid, but come sleep time, especially around the 0-5 month mark it HAD to be me and it HAD to be a boob in her mouth.
Urgh! Just remembering those car trips with her SCREAMING makes me tense. She also hated the pram and would scream in that. I used to stare at other children asleep in their prams and think...how do they do it?
BUT. It passed. I can't remember when, but DD now always falls asleep in the car (I think that was about 10 months) and by 8 months she LOVED a new stroller my mum bought (I think she hated my very expensive fandangled pram!)
Anyway. It is so, so normal for attachment-parented babies to do this. Most mums who parent like us, just avoid the car (or use a dummy in the car) and don't even own prams. It might have something to do with the baby's personality, in that, they are super sensitive, and hyper aware of their surroundings and the fact mum isn't holding them.
For people to start pointing the finger at you, and undermining what a great mum you are is not acceptable (and is so, so freakin typical of people who don't understand babies...when in doubt blame it on the mum! Grrr)
you're doing a great job! Your dd is perfect. P.E.R.F.E.C.T!!! Can we help you cope with the sitaution better? Because we're here for you when you need.
If you weren't happy, then there are of course things you could try, not because you're doing anything wrong, just if you wanted things different. If bub needs to be held, perhaps a baby carrier would help, if she fell asleep in the sling maybe she'd transfer easily to her bed.
For what it's worth, I know anxious people with chilled children and vice versa. I do believe that when it comes to fears, anxieties, we can sometimes sort of pass them to children (for example, if I stress about an issue, then my children learn it's an issue), but even that's not guaranteed.
So I guess my answer is sort of mixed. What you're describing doesn't sound abnormal, and bub is only 6 months. And you say you and bub are happy so that's great! Kids have different temperaments and personalities - I was a great sleeper and my sister was a pain in that regard - same parents!
However, it's really great that you're self aware about anything bub might pick up on, and I can't answer that for you. If you think you stress too much about things, and you can moderate that so that bub doesn't pick up on it, that's probably a good thing - for both you and bub. xo
So yeah, summed up - sounds fine and normal and great! But also your self-awareness is fantastic too.
i have two children that have both been parented exactly the same way - breastfed, co-slept etc. etc. and one is hyperactive and wild and the other is what i would call high maintanence, more whingy and sensitive and definitely not easy going. they're completely different kids with completely different personalities. it sounds like you're doing a great job, keep it up!
Sorry, that just isn't true, they are who they are. I tend towards the stressier end of the spectrum but both of my kids are usually pretty chilled out. Don't doubt yourself and don't doubt what you are doing...if people can see you are confident in your parenting they won't even question it, kwim? You sound like you're doing a great job of it, too.
I really think they are all individuals.
My girls are both extremely different. DD1 is more clingy, needs more reassurance, sleeps badly and is very mum centred. DD2 is more independant, stubborn and less reliant on me (even at 15 months). DD2 has coslept, demand fed and been held pretty much constantly from nb-11 months old then began asserting her independence in a big way!
Who knows how it all happens - but regardless it must be a combo of every influence in their worlds - not just one!
Sounds like you are doing a great job about reflecting on your experiences and influences on and with your babe....don't let anyone knock your confidence. Sounds like you are doing a fab job. xxx
Wow!
What a fabulous amount of responses and support in such a small space of time! Big thanks to all of you - you've made my week
Basically you've just confirmed what a probably knew was true but needed to hear from those not so close to me I'm not doubting my parenting methods one bit - perhaps just wondering whether I'm letting other people's opinions get in my way - which I reckon I have!
I think I'm projecting a lot of my fears that my own mum's hyper-anxious, strict parenting and drama-queen personality has shaped my sensitivities - ie can I stop the cycle? (Ironically it's my mum (and sis) making most of the comments!)
So good to hear of such a wide range of personalities being successfully GP'd within the same family too
you're doing a great job! Your dd is perfect. P.E.R.F.E.C.T!!! Can we help you cope with the sitaution better? Because we're here for you when you need.
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