Friggen over it.... bedtime battles.....

[diva det]

Awww Kelly- my DD is so much like your DD when i comes to sleep- it was 12.30 the other nite and b/c its school hols and she is not metally tired- most nites it is at least 10.30!!!

My DD is an absolute nightmare to get to sleep- if she starts to get tired early and i miss the opportunity to put her to bed i am a goner and she is up till all hours!!
Things that have worked for me over the years are:

Stroking her head until she goes to sleep- once she loses it- then it is impossible to get her to sleep- stroking her head keeps her calm

An eye mask- sounds freaky i know, but she can still have a light on, but the sensorial stimulation is taken away and more chance to go to sleep

Playing her leapster- these have been fantastic- esp when she is 'not tired' she can play her game in bed quietly by herself for hours and i at least get a break and she gets some quiet time- btw i got her kids headphones with them- they are a gem as well. Also her looking at books tends to make her sleepy as well, and go to sleep with books open!

We ended up taking away after school activites for her for a while until she started going to sleep at a good time. This worked really well for a bit as she wanted to do the activities so she tried that bit harder!

New bedding- a new doona, pillow and underlay that she chose herself made her bed more comfy the way that SHE wanted!!

If i remember right Marissa is going to school this year???? You will notice a big difference then! MY DD his pretty smart for her age as well, and if she doesnt get enough mental stimualation througout the day- she just does not get tired enough to switch off at nite!!!! Their little minds have trouble turning off and its hard to teach them to do so!!

Hang in there- the more you stress, the more she will!! Plus you guys are obviously going through heaps of changes at the moment and she would be picking up on them tooo!

Take care hon and keep sane!!!!!
odette

[BellyBelly]

Thanks hon, she was at school this year, I guess it could be a holidays thing too, they aren't as mentally stimulated. So frustrating, Elijah passes out so quick and likes it dark, she likes the light on and takes forever!!!

[Astrolady]

Kel. We are having issues with Kameron going to sleep of late too and there is nothing major going on in his life. At 8pm we say "c'mon mate, toilet, teeth, bed, then he does the whole whingy whiney, thing of I'm not tired blah blah blah" he only does this when he is over tired. He also has to do the "I want a drink" etc once in his room.

Just to get him to go to bed, we've been telling him that he can do whatever he wants to do as long as he is in bed. It might be reading, drawing or playing cars as long as he is on his bed we don't care. He will normally fall asleep doing whatever it was he was doing, so we go in there and pack it away and turn the light out when we go to bed.

We're just glad Lachlan likes the light on to go to sleep since they share a room lol.

[westy]

Hoepfully once everything settles down and you can get back into a routine everything will be ok ....if she is still unsettled maybe try a night light in her room, that is if you haven't already done so.

Kathryn, thats a great idea might be something worth trying with Marissa ,Kelly.

Is she still awake and crying now?

[tiggerandpooh]

big kelly The joys of single motherhood, moving house, and reestabilshing routine... so much fun!! Have you tired rescue remedy with her? It may help the anxiety. Don't be too hard on yourself hun - you are HUMAN - not super human. You have a hell of a lot going on - massive massive change for you, and your children. You are going to lose your temper - your not a robot. wrap your arms around your little girl, say I'm sorry, mummy has a lot of things going on her head at the moment, and she is trying to think, I didnt mean to lose my temper, I love you lots.

As for the ongoing bedtime dramas - after I split from my big kids father, and things were getting on top of me, I read a book called Boundaries with Kids: When to Say YES, When to say NO, to help your children gain control of their lives. It changed how I parent - and all the "things" I was having issues with them about.

I hope that things settle down soon hun, and then the rythm and routine of your home returns soon.

[AngelPunks]

rescue remedy also do a sleep version which used to work on DH whenever I could get him to take it - I'm about to go and take some now - i'm bouncy from doing ritual tonight under the moonlight

Kel - could you try some meditation practices with her, even get her to lie there and feel her breath go into her body, let her imagine it flowing all around her body and then blowing it out, as she blows it out she can imagine all the ikky bad stuff coming out.

[LimeSlice]

I dont know if this would work, but if she is scared of you leaving and likes when you read to her, could you read a few books she likes onto a CD or tape and put them on when you put her to bed? So that she can listen to mummy even though you cant being there with her?

I have nothing! lol

I hope it gets better for you really soon, you need some space and time to yourself, I hope you get it soon! In the meantime have a

[AngelPunks]

Kel
you know the glow sticks, the ones you can make into bracelets - maybe hanging a few of those over her bed may help her with the dark issue - I know it worked with my DSS when he used to come and visit, he was in the bunk, so we used to put a couple up along the bar at the top and then I'd put one on each step down for him.

If I was down there, I'd come over and help you, so you could get some breathing space to yourself.

She's probably just really disrupted with spending time with their dad and also with you packing.

Sending lots of love and hugs to you!

[BellyBelly]

Awww ta Schaz hon x

I ended up sitting on the end of the bed and reading til she fell asleep, but I dont think I can expect much while everything is so crazy. I really needed to vent though lol

Thanks everyone for your advice and support... a few things to try now so all good. I'm putting them into holiday care from Tuesday cos I need to work so hope that helps them a bit. It's hard to work with them around. Better go to sleep, lashed out and got a cleaner to come tomorrow morning to help me, the cupboards need a good clean out now they are empty and all that, so looking forward to it, she's gonna start at 7am tho so will look like awful I am sure

Thanks ladies sleep well xx

[westy]

Kelly....do you know if she has been like this for the last two weeks while she has been at her Dad's ?

You asked her what was wrong and she said scared but did she say what she was scared of ?

[BellyBelly]

Scared of the dark

I think they had lots of late nights while they were away, I highly highly doubt they had any routine, so they would have gone to bed when they said they were tired (exhausted). Elijah usually starts asking for bed if he's not been put to bed by 9pm. I guess its all about getting back into routine. They stayed up for NYE too apparently, although Elijah passed out lol.