That's great your DH is supportive! Hope things work out.
I think mixing things up a bit is a good idea - helps you to figure out different strategies that work at different times.
Do you give your DD cow's milk? DD has cut her feeds right back, but when she does wake up at night looking for a drink (and she's not sick or teething) then I warm up some cows milk and give her a drink of that, a cuddle, a bit of a rock and she's back to land of nod in no time. Just something else to try if you need to you're doing great and your DD wont be feeding overnight for ever.
We went through this too. I agree- don't worry about the nights when it all goes pear shaped, just try again the next night.
Our son started in the cot then came into our bed too. I started just letting him have cuddles instead of milk and he wasn't happy at first. We offered water, cup of milk, banana and rice cakes in bed but no milk from mummy. Sometimes he cried so much I just cuddled him for a while but sometimes he took some water, milk or food. If he got really distressed then I fed him but then I would try not to feed him later in the evening. My plan was to cut down to one night feed (from 2-3 feeds) so I generally aimed for that to be after midnight. Then I fed him whenever he woke in the morning after 5am than again on real wake up at about 7am (but sometimes I was able to skip the 7am one and just get up with him). It only took a little while and he stopped asking for the midnight one and starting sleeping!!!! So I was just doing the 2 morning feeds till soon he dropped the 5am one too. At around the same time he dropped to one day sleep so I was only feeding him once in the day too.
Once I was down to four feeds a day (morning, day sleep, evening and once overnight) I got my period back and I fell pregnant while still BFing but then he weaned because he didn't like my milk anymore I guess.
Yeah we did do the Jay Gordon thing last time, sort of, adjusted a bit to suit us, very gradually. But this time we sort of went just straight into it. We are not feeding for part of the night and also with the other feeds I'm taking her off before she's completely asleep. This worked well last night with the feeds she had, she had a little 30 second whinge and then rolled around a bit and went to sleep herself in a couple of minutes. So maybe not doing it so gradually has made it a lot harder. I didn't think it would make a difference bc last time I was wondering if I was just confusing her with the JG stuff. Obviously not! But we've started now and it's getting easier so we'll just continue.
The last 2 nights have not been as bad!! She hasn't done the same thing where she's been up for hours on end refusing to go back to sleep!! We cut it back to not feeding for a minimum of 5 hrs and tonight we're increasing it to 6. Last night she slept for almost 5 hrs straight up which is great for her! Then she woke and it took DH 45mins and 3 attampts but he got her back down without a feed. She was very angry! lol. Not upset like the first night but more of an angry yell like she knows what's going on and she's not happy!! But she is getting used to it. Then she only slept for 30mins and woke again and I fed her bc it had been long enough and I was happy that she had actually gone down for a bit without a feed.
But the rest of the night was shocking! She made up for it by feeding every hr for the last 4 hrs! So I'm not sure what to do about that? Just keep going and extending the time?? I'm not sure if it defeats the purpose by feeding her that much in the second half of the night and if I should maybe limit it to 1 feed a night and not feed her again til 7am or something. Any ideas??
Thanks guys! At least it's not as bad as the first night. And luckily I have DH to settle her and she's not screaming at me for booby!
I night weaned DD, but TBH she was a little bit older than your DD. For some reason, at about your DD's age for a few months she suddenly increased her need for bfing overnight. In our case it might have had something to do with the fact that as DD was becoming more independent during the day (and spending a couple of afternoons which soon became a day with her godmother) she needed to reconnect with me at night.
It sounds like you are ready to night wean, because of TTC, but she might not be just yet. You're feeling guilty because you think you're pushing her, etc, etc. Night weaning to try to give her a brother or sister is a wonderful blessing for her, one that she will have for most of her life! Don't beat yourself up over it.
I would hesitate to drop the night feed before bed. If she does need a feed nutritionally, or to wind down (which was definitely the case in our household), it might make it harder to put her to bed in the first place. Plus, it disrupts her routine even further.
I told my DD that boobies were asleep while it was night and we had a drink of water by the bed instead. If she was thirsty, that was enough. If she wants comfort, lots of cuddles. I'm not so sure about getting up to warm up milk, etc, sounds like that might be more disruptive to your sleep than just bfing back to sleep! It took a good few days of DD being very definitely unimpressed with the lack of bbs before she asked for and expected water. She still asked occasionally afterwards, but was settled pretty readily. She was 16-17 mths at the time. Another thing I did was to convert her cot to a junior bed so she could come into us when she woke (my DD wasn't good at resettling on her own in the middle of the night either).
hun. I hope you figure out a balance that works for you and your family!
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you're doing great and your DD wont be feeding overnight for ever.
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