We went through this too. I agree- don't worry about the nights when it all goes pear shaped, just try again the next night.

Our son started in the cot then came into our bed too. I started just letting him have cuddles instead of milk and he wasn't happy at first. We offered water, cup of milk, banana and rice cakes in bed but no milk from mummy. Sometimes he cried so much I just cuddled him for a while but sometimes he took some water, milk or food. If he got really distressed then I fed him but then I would try not to feed him later in the evening. My plan was to cut down to one night feed (from 2-3 feeds) so I generally aimed for that to be after midnight. Then I fed him whenever he woke in the morning after 5am than again on real wake up at about 7am (but sometimes I was able to skip the 7am one and just get up with him). It only took a little while and he stopped asking for the midnight one and starting sleeping!!!! So I was just doing the 2 morning feeds till soon he dropped the 5am one too. At around the same time he dropped to one day sleep so I was only feeding him once in the day too.

Once I was down to four feeds a day (morning, day sleep, evening and once overnight) I got my period back and I fell pregnant while still BFing but then he weaned because he didn't like my milk anymore I guess.