I thought this might a great topic for us to share our techniques as parents on how we empower our children through our gentle parenting practices.

I'll post some here (feel free to ask me about them) and I'd love to hear form other mothers too.

  • Our children are given choices, instead of just "No" we offer them alternatives to their behaviour. We never utter the words "Because I said so". Explanations are always given.
  • Our rules apply to all household members. For example if I have told Paris not to speak rudely and I snap at her she has just as much right to pull me up on it as I have with her.
  • We don't make promises we can't keep. I don't expect my children to promise me they won't do xxx ever again, instead we ask that she promises to *try* harder next time, and that is an expectation she can keep of herself.
  • If I have a meltdown it is my responsibilty to apologise and reconcile with my children, it is not their fault (no matter how much they have tested the boundaries) that I have screamed and yelled. We talk and cuddle and reassure each other of our love. And we talk through solutions to help with the problem so its less likely to occur in the future.
  • Consistancy is important. We believe that if you be inconsistant with children it is not fair to punish them. It is not fair that a behaviour that was ok yesterday is not ok today, children do not read minds and it is our responsibility to allow them to feel safe within their boundaries.
  • Discussion is not talking back. If our children feel the need to express themselves in a situation where they have been told No, or asked to do something we allow it. We expect that the discussion is respectful with no tantruming or rudeness but it is perfectly ok to speak ones mind.
  • Praise is the biggest tool for us. We praise our children when they do great things, or when they do little things. We don't "over praise" but we do like to show our appreciation for who they are.
  • We do not ignore our children. Even when I have had enough and I am tired and they are restless or being excessively repetitive we try to ensure that we always respond. There is nothing worse than "Yes dear" I still can remember the day I realised my parents weren't actually listened.
  • We don't mouth off. If you don't want your children to mouth off at you as you see it as disrespectful then your children deserve the same resepct.


I'll add some more as I think of them Would love to hear from others.