Sorry i cant really offer much advise. I can however relate to u on the tantrum side of things. Bodhi is a major tanty chucker. He will also do it over absolutly anything. I usually just let him go for it,most of the time he stops after 10mins or so. There have been other times when he just cant be consoled. I find the best way to stop him is to distract him tho. A friend of mine told me to try reading to him. He just loves books now. If he is having a tantrum & see's me coming towards him with a book, 8 times out of 10 he will stop & just come sit on my knee. The times he wont come to me tho, i put him in bed & he has a little time out. He might cry in bed for a few minutes but then he just starts talking to himself. Then i go get him out.
I know how stressful it can get. I have been through stages where iv just cried cause there was nothing i could do
Ur DS will grow out of it,probably sooner rather than later. I remember Mya-Rose also being the same when she was that age......mind u she can still chuck nice tantrum as well hehe just not as often.

Good luck with it all i look forward to seeing other ppls advise on this as well