Hey LR, missive hugs we've BTDT too and I so completely know how you feel. We stopped co-sleeping with DS when he was nearly 2, a few months before DD arrived. It was such a terrible few weeks while we all adjusted and I do still miss him (DH doesn't ). But, on balance, it really was absolutely the best thing we ever did for us as a family. We are all (yes all four of us) sleeping really well now and we still get to have delicious cuddles all together in the morning. A generally consistent good night's sleep is an amazing thing. Keep at it, be consistent, you'll get there, it won't take too long (especially if you are consistent and don't give him mixed messages about what you want him to do). Lots more hugs in the meantime

ETA: I just realised you posted this a few days ago. How are you going?