I never forced my boys to use manners. I used it when I passed them a cup for example and said please and thank you and they just followed my lead. when I say I didn't force them I mean I didn't make them say it or I wouldn't give them what they asked for. as they got older I would simply say manners please and they used them.. Even now sometimes they forget but I know they don't mean it so I don't mention it but they use their manners 95% of the time..