I've gotta say I'm in favour of having someone around. Not necessarily a midwife, but then you'd want to know the credentials of the person attending. So this, technically, makes it not a freebirth. Just that I really like the idea of the village 'midwife' (doula) who attends births, like in my grandma's village in Central America, who birthed all 9 of my aunts, uncles and my mum. I love middies, too, don't get me wrong, but with the current situation, and me birthing in the country next time (though I hear of a IM in the next big town), I've been considering my non-MW options. It's a way off, but toying with it anyway. After DS's birth I started to get involved in the HB community early on, after using a birth centre, so that by the time the next one was cooking I was well-versed and very confident with my journey. There are forums that have lots of members who freebirth, and these kinds of forums can be a bit full on in their opinions of IM's at births, even!! However, the people I know personally who have freebirthed are lovely and DON'T eat their placentas
I can't really help you sorry fruit tingles but I wanted to subscribe as I find the topic interesting. I considered a freebirth this time around as I'm having a homebirth and it's pretty pricey, but I've decided to pay for midwife support.
I can't imagine any decent independent midwife 'bullying' a woman in labour- maybe hospital midwives as I've heard of so many who don't seem to "get" birth even though they work around birthing women all day.
Good luck with your decision and let us know how you get on
If you are going to freebirth why not homebirth with a good IM you can trust and get along with? If things go wrong they go wrong quickly and it can be good to have someone there who wont have the adrenaline flowing and with a level head and who knows what to do. Is it really fair to put that pressure on your partner? Mind you a true freebirth is birthing completely by yourself with no-one else there. By all means learn infant resuscitation, but the resuscitation techniques on a newborn are slightly different (as in different breathing rates and heart rates) but any resuscitation is better then none. Just factor in how long it would take for an ambulance to reach you if something went wrong, sometimes you only have 2 -3 minutes.
Perhaps you could speak to an IM and line one up, but just decide on the day if you want someone to attend the birth. It is nice to have the midwives come check on you after the birth too and be on call for breastfeeding or other issues. In short an IM offers so much more than birth attendance, and I think they're invaluable.
There are midwives who are very hands off too...perhaps you could chat with a few and find one that suits your needs.
birth is so precious...I hope you get the one you're hoping for.
Thank you every one for your replies.
I don't really know what I want for this birth. I am currently under GP care for this pregnancy, and have nothing to do with the hospital or midwives. I have no choice in this. This really scares me.
With DD I birthed in a hospital, but the midwives pretty much just sat in the corner and left DP and I to ourselves, they just checked me every so often. They kept the OBs off my back wanting to get me prepared for surgery because they were not happy with how I was progressing.
My birth was absolutely amazing, no complications, pretty straight forward and text book.
This time around though, everything is up in the air. I'm under a doctors care, I have nothing to do with the hospital, or midwives, and I would rather be under midwife care than have anything to do with doctors.
On top of that, DP and I will be moving a large distance from where we are living currently, so to hire a IM is out of the question, because who knows where we will be when I give birth? If we have moved before I go into labour, I have FILs sister who has worked as a midwife and is quite high up in that area, who I can call and she has offered to come assist me should I need it. We discussed a homebirth with her but at the time it was not a option for myself, let alone DP.
All I know though, is that I will not be in a rush to go to hospital if I were in labour. I will do a lot of labouring at home, for literally as long as I feel I can.
I also have this instinct that I will be giving birth alone, without medical supervision or assistance, and I am completely at ease with this. I am not scared by it, it feels natural to me, and I am inclined to say that that is what I want.
I don't think I can say it will be planned, just that it is most likely what will happen considering I plan to stay home as long as I possibly can.
Does that all sound pretty crazy? In my head it makes sense, but I'm not sure if maybe I'm coming across as some crazy minded person.
I'm 28 weeks pregnant and the only non-scary option to give birth is free-birthing. Hospital birthing with a doctor, in a hospital I know nothing about and have no association with, and midwives I don't even know I can trust, is so daunting and scary.
Fruit Tingles - wow, how scary a situation that you're in. I would love a homebirth, but my DH would freak. Have you done a first aid course? And just wondering, what are your plans with DD1 during the birth? Must say that you've made a very logical decision. With the hospital, is it possible to do a tour and meet the midwives - would that put your mind at ease somewhat?
Must say I agree with Alan. Obviously its your body and your baby and your decision but if something does go wrong can you take responsibility for your actions? And have a DOCS notification reporting you for not having the best interests of your baby at heart. Not been cruel just stating the facts that if something did go wrong and you did end up in hospital with complications then that would probably be one of the consequences. And for your older child? That tiny tiny risk of you (not including your unborn baby) leaving your older child with a compromised mother! Yeah it happens in hospital and intervention does increase that chance where as your reducing it at home but you have trained medical staff dealing with any problems that arises (and thus the responsibility is on them not you) Can you throw that responsibility on your family memeber that is a midwife and let her take responsibility and possible look at de-registration if something did go wrong and an inquest showed her to be at fault? Why not home birth? I am sure you could find an IM at a later stage depending on what area you were settled in. That gives you the option of staying at home and not having the interference of others except your IM hiding in the background (or participating how you want them to) and still having the security that a trained professional is there is the instance that something did happen that need fixing (such as a cord around the neck etc.
I am all for home birth definately but free birthing can be dangerous. Google what happened to one of the largest advocates of free birthing in Australia Janet Fraser.
As for the paper work that can be difficult. Not sure how you get your birth certificate and medicare forms etc as the midwife at your babies birth is the one to sign it and not sure how you go about proving you birthed your bub etc. I know a friend who had an unintentional birth at home and it took her months to get her money for bub as she was alone.
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birth is so precious...I hope you get the one you're hoping for.
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