Yes yes very true, its just that DH and i feel that we dont need anymore education, and probably a lot less support than a 1st timer.
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I feel your pain - but remember, it's not so much the birth you are paying as for, as all of the education and support you receive in the lead-up to the birth.
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Yes yes very true, its just that DH and i feel that we dont need anymore education, and probably a lot less support than a 1st timer.
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Yay for just booking your home birth too Tegam- exciting times! Have you actually booked a midwife and you are considering cancelling? It would be hard if you have such sort labours. My last labour was 17 hours so even with a shorter2nd labour I think my midwife will have time to get here!
So sorry your last birth didn't go well Cassius and I hope this home birth gives you a wonderful empowering experienceWe haven't bought Hello Baby yet but I'm dead keen- can't wait to add it to our reading list. My son is still just a bit too young to "get" that we're having a baby but I've taught him to say "big brother" and it's SO sweet
Great to have some "old" homebirthers too- thanks for joining in and helping us with our journeys
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yes talked to MW last week and she said that she comes out at 14weeks and books everything then. Just going to have a chat to her and see if there is any way of the cost being lowered if she doesnt make the birth. Its funny as even if she got here i dont think i want/need her in the room. Really need to just have more of a think about freebirthing! Even tho i am a seasoned HBer it just seems so tree huggy to have a freebirth (Meant it the kindest/ warmest way)!
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Hi girls!
Tegam: maybe you could explore options like doulas or something? that way the pressure is off you and DH to go it alone all the way and you (or DH) have someone to bounce ideas off either before the labour or during IYKWIM? i dunno...maybe something to consider. i'm funny in that i am quite the opposite lol. i love a crowd LOL! that said, i want them all to shut-up and let me be, but i love love love having the others around me cheering and celebrating (quietly please).
Meow: i can't rate 'hello baby' highly enough! it is just so sweet. i even had to start a thread about it for birth book recommendations lol.
Jasper: was your DD2s birth your first at home? i soo cannot wait to welcome this baby into the world via our loungeroom...
AFM: well we had our first 'calmbirth' class last night. i really loved it and so did DH. it was really nice to connect with other couples and share this experience. i guess being a HB, we are not surrounded by the business of birth so much, so it's nice to connect a little with others travelling the pg path iykwim. i was *slightly* annoyed though that the others were asked where they were birthing (hospitals) and because my teacher knew we were birthing at home she didnt ask us...and me being all affronted felt that maybe it wouldnt of been welcome to mention?? i will have to raise it at another stage. cause there is no way that i am going to 'hide' it! i am certain it was just an oversight as she HB her babies and is my support midwife...but ya know, hormones on the rampage LOL!
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Hello again ladies! Welcome to the new ones.I haven't been in here in a while. I'm expecting number five, hoping to have my second homebirth in September.
I have to say that free birth does makes me kind of nervous. If you end up with a shoulder dystocia, is your DH going to know what to do? Even if he's read the book 100 times, in the heat of the moment, with the woman he loves screaming on the floor, and the baby half out, he will likely panic. I would. And if you end up with major tearing, or a post partum hemorrhage, he can't fix that. And can he judge, with a doppler, when a baby is going into distress? Would he be able to recognize abnormal labour? Know what to do with an undiagnosed breech?
I don't want to be just throwing out "scare stories" or anything. I believe that in the VAST majority of cases, birth goes very smoothly and very well, with NO interference from anyone. But I think it is wise to plan have an experienced midwife available. If you are a fast labourer, then definitely prepare yourself for the possibility of an unattended birth, but personally, I would not plan to do without a midwife.
I might have to check out the "Hello Baby" book. I don't think I've seen that one yet. My kids are pretty familiar with homebirth. They thought it strange that other babies were born in the hospital after DD3 was born. "Are they sick Mom? Why are they at the hospital?"
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A silly oversight from your teacher Cassius- just because she already knows doesn't mean it's not good info for the rest of your class to hear. And I can understand you wanted to tell everyone- it's exciting!
I have read Hello Baby- I read it in the library when I was pregnant last time. Had to hide in the aisles for a while till I could dry my eyes enough to leave! It's beautiful and I can't wait to share it with my son
My Mum had a homebirth with my little sister when I was 13 and the thing I loved the most was the way the baby just became a member of our family in a matter of seconds. There was no "coming home" ceremony, she was just there. It was like she had always been there and she belonged. Very special.
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this is exactly why we decided to go for a HB this time around. it was DH that insisted and began to ask questions and beg me to cancel at the mercy BC...last time at the hospital was such an isolating and disengaging experience that poor DH was shoved to the periphery and we felt our separation acutely. even when DD was born we were not made to feel that he was really 'welcome' or necessary. which if they had of taken a moment to notice they would of seen that we are incredibly close and spiritually connected people with eachother, we feel the distance acutely. this time it HAD to be different. the clincher was when our psychologist (treating me for my PTSD...which i developed as a result of the traumatic birth experience) told me to avoid the hospital like the plague and have baby at home. a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. one that i never even knew i had been carrying at the time.
p.s. i also absolutely BAWLED my eyes out reading 'hello baby' LOL! DD was slightly concerned that mama had snot pouring outta her nose (yes, it was ugly cry lol) and tears streaming when the book was a happy one LOL!
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Popping in to say "HI"
I haven't posted on BB for ages, but when I look at the first page of this thread, there I am! That was when I was planning my last homebirth. And I've been receiving update for this thread for over two years now (I couldn't unsubscribe, I love hearing about homebirth journey's)
So I'm back again. Pregnant with bubba #4, due in Nov, and my last baby (next time I get clucky, I'm getting a puppy!) I was always wanting to have a homebirth for this babe and have had my midwife lined up for ages (she's awesome!) but with all the legislative hooha and messing around by the government, I (and my MW) wasn't sure what was going to happen. So as a back-up, I put myself on the birth centre ballot....
BUT, this week my MW called and said "let's do it". WOOOOHOOOOO!!!! I did and happy dance and a half! I was actually a little surprised my reaction, I wasn't really aware I would be quite so excited by it. So hooray for being able to join the thread and sharing my journey. Hooray for not having to drag kids to the hospy for appts. Hooray for having to include my family in the birth with ease
Oh, and on the topic of "Hello Baby", we read it to my kids when I was pregnant and planning a homebirth. Great book. I remember reading it to them for their bedtime story the day I went into labour. I was in early labour, but a contration hit while I was reading and I had to pause for a second. Kids got narky and DH had to take over! lol.... In the end, I birthed in the wee hours of the morning, and even though we woke our eldest to see if he wanted to see the baby being born, he wasn't interested.
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Oh Cassius, I'm so sorry you had such an awful experienceI've never, ever understood how unwelcome father's are in maternity hospitals!! They just became a new parent too! All maternity rooms should have double beds- standard!
We had a double bed in our BC and my H was my primary support person during labour and birth. He and I are very close too and it felt like the midwife and our doula were there as my "knowledgeable birthing women" but my H was the one who really knew ME IYKWIM.
Congratulations Kaos!! Who knows what is going on with homebirth huh? Apparently it will not be made illegal but we're yet to find out quite how the possibility of insurance and prescribing rights will go ahead.
I'm having my first meeting with my midwife tomorrow!! I'm so excited but also a bit nervous. I think I'm mostly nervous about going over the sums and working out the actual cost. What extra costs did any of the previous homebirthers pay? I haven't looked into how much a morphology scan costs yet but I'm most anxious about GD. What if I get it? How on earth to do you manage the costs of care for something like GD? I wish I could easily access public pregnancy care along with paying for my homebirth. I am booked into the FBC again and I'd like to stay booked with them until after the GD test but I feel funny about that with my midwife. Will she think I'm not able to let go of the hospital thing? Will she not like the idea that I'm having antenatal care with tham and her? I know it's my choice but does that make things awkward?
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Yay Kaos....our kids are almost the same age, it was like reading a post bout myself LOL. Congrats and i cant wait to talk more
Meiw, ill write more later when i have time, but most MW wont care if you are seeing someone in the public sector at the same time, they will only mind when it comes down to the business end and if the other party wants to do any intervention . MY mw was very stern on the fact that say if i did a s&s at the hospital and my waters broke then she would no longer deliver at home as then it wasnt a "normal" birth it was a medicalised birth and not what she specialises in IYKWIM??
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Thanks Tegam- that sounds completely rational to me and I would totally accept a midwife's standing on that point. Hopefully all goes well chatting to my midwife tomorrow
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goodluck for tomorrow Meow!
it took me two goes to find the 'right' MW. in the end i found a great midwife who was part of the same practice, i felt a bit funny saying no to her colleague, but they are AOK with it all and know that you need to feel 'right' about it ITMS.
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Who have you chosen Cassius? We're near each other so probably looking at the same midwives
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Helen just left after a very long chat and I'm SO excited. All just seems so perfect. She's very proactive about talking about what we'll "fix" from last time and has no problems with me staying public to finish up my tests. I'm going to have my 20 week ultrasound and last appointment at the birth centre then I'll see her again at 24 weeks and we'll take it from there. So exciting all the booking forms are done and having a huge chat about my past experiences etc. Love her
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That sounds great and yes even tho i didnt have any issues from my other births i was still suprised how nice it was to talk about the others!
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I am so glad you love her! That's awesome!!
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That's awesome meow! I didn't think that it should be problem for you to access public services. I think MW's are quite aware how the costs add up, considering they are part of the $$ outlay.
Last homebirth I decided not to do anything at the hosp and have the morphology scan privately. Then something came up with that and I had an amnio. And then the extra GP visits (paying the gap fee from my expensive, but awesome GP, I had to see her a couple of extra time for hyperthyroid issue that she was able to manage) then organising oxygen and a birth pool added about $1000 to my homebirth (that's just an estimate). And that was on top of the $4000 MW fees. Though expensive, I never regretted the cost. The whole prenatal, homebirth and postnatal care was awesome.
This time (different MW) the $4000 includes the birth pool and oxygen, I'm going public for morphology scan and I'll be mostly liasing with my GP via phone for management of hyperthyroid issue. Will save the $$... though I did have to shell out a lot of $$ for Zofran to survive morning sickness. And this is my last pregnancy and I'm determined to enjoy it, so I am going to put some dollars away for pregnancy yoga....
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