Homebirth General Discussion #13

[Cricket]

I've started putting meals and baking in the freezer already now, so I have some things to pull out after baby arrives. And, you can always throw in a few extra freezer meals from the grocery store - some frozen pizzas, or something easy like that. Not the healthiest, necessarily, but perfect for a quick easy meal that DH or someone can throw in the oven for you. The cleaning will just have to slide for a little bit. It drives me crazy, and my DH does do a pretty decent job during the week he stays home post-baby, but there's always stuff that will just have to wait until later. Or, you can arrange for a cleaner to come once or twice a week for a little while after baby, or you can line up a couple good friends to take care of a list of cleaning that you can prepare for them. You kind of have to mentally prepare yourself for a few weeks of just getting by after the baby arrives, and remind yourself that it is just for a time. There will come a day when you're up and at it again, and your house will look the way you like it, but that just has to wait for a little bit.

[HotI]

WM, :hugs: I bought a second hand freezer that sits on my deck (still) before DS was born so I could have meals ready to go. It was a life saver in the early days.

It is perfectly acceptable to ask visitors to bring food when they visit. I don't remember all the presents that I got, but I certainly remember who brought food. I try to remember that when friends have babies and take a meal or some bikkies.

I also found the middle of the pregnancy a bit weird, cos there wasn't as much urgency or kerfuffle as when going through the hospital. It was way more natural, but it did require a mindshift to be comfortable with it. The realisation that you don't have to stress about when to leave for hospital and other changes can be both scary and liberating.

[Jennifer13]

I sent my m/w a hamper of groceries as a gift after her new bub last mth (she's too far away to drop off meals), do dinners for close by friends and sent my cleaner to another friend's house as her baby gift. Seems so much more useful than another outfit!

Yay Cricket for another DS!

Oh my, Arimeh. Can't believe it's already time to find out the flavour!

LBF, not long now, feels real when you're organising those last little things!

[Arimeh]

I had a horrible thought today - its probably really selfish and self-indulgent to have an expensive homebirth while we are on centrelink benefits isn't it?

Maybe I should just suck it up and go through the hospital.

[TeniBear]

Teni- how frustrating when you know your body better then the professionals yet they seem to still not listen to you. I must say I had a bit of a giggle about the bladder thing. Why do they use such odd terms?!?!? How is the midwife searching going?

I'm fairly certain I'll be going with MAMA. I've emailled back and forth with them a few times now, and met Kelly at the Baby & Toddler Expo on Sunday. She seems pretty great I don't even mind that I'll be going to them for appointments - even though that was one of the perks when I was first considering homebirth - because they're really not that far away. Plus since I'm used to the hospital model of care, I've come to associate pregnancy checkups with sitting in waiting rooms I am slightly worried about Jan, since I've met her before and she seemed a little severe, but I'm hoping she was just having a bad day and I got the wrong first impression

I'm going to see the doctor they work with for my referral, because as I suspected the GP yesterday wasn't meant to be the one to fill it out. It has to be an OB or GP/OB, not just a regular GP.

Uhhhmmmm, what else was I going to say? I know there was something I wanted to add, but I got distracted

[Arimeh]

Double post.

[Eenee]

Nope not at all Arimeh!

Williams Mummy, it can seem like it will all be overwhelming but all will be good, at least you will have no bag unpacking and stuff to come home to. As for meals well early days DH would go buy heathy take away or cooked chicken from Coles we had with salad. And then a few great friends brought us meals which even catered to our food intolerances/allergies so if anyone asks how they can help just say meals.

[HotI]

I had a horrible thought today - its probably really selfish and self-indulgent to have an expensive homebirth while we are on centrelink benefits isn't it?

Maybe I should just suck it up and go through the hospital.

And increase your chance of a surgical birth, and/or other interventions, plus the added expense to the public system? I like your idea of homebirth, if you can afford it, way better.

[TeniBear]

Yeah, think of it this way - either way the government is technically paying for your birth (Medicare vs Centerlink) so you might as well make it the birth you want!

And now I've convinced myself of the same. I'd been having similar thoughts.

[PumpkinZulu]

Lol I never thought about that at all haha! We even took out a low income loan to pay for a chunk of ours too, from a charity, so err...

Like Teni said, taxpayers are funding most births in this country anyway, may as well be one that gives you less of a chance of costing more with extra drugs, interventions and surgeries to fork out for, not to mention taking up a bed you don't need.

ETA like, we qualified for the loan because we're young, low income, and can be granted for medical expenses, we totes didn't scam it lol!

[Cassius2]

Every single person on this planet deserves and should have the right to choose the birth they want.

Get your homebirth Arimeh and NEVER look back.

(BTW PZ...totally love your sig quote!)

[Arimeh]

I think I'm feeling guilty because I went to a charity this week to get food to make sure I didn't go over budget this fortnight - and the only reason my budget is so tight is because I'm saving for this. Argh. I dunno just hard to get around the fact its money spent on me and not my kids.

[PumpkinZulu]

If you end up injured from interventions at the hospital, you'd be out of action for weeks. If you developed PND or PTSD from trauma during the birth, you'd be out if action for months. Best thing for your new bubba, all your other babies, and yes, for you too, is a nice uncomplicated birth at home. IMO

[Cricket]

I dunno just hard to get around the fact its money spent on me and not my kids.

Are you not delivering a kid with this money? You're bringing that baby into his/her own home, into gentle hands, not to be taken away from you or left on the warming table, etc. You're giving that baby a homebirth too, not just you.

And, you are showing your other children what birth can and should be for a healthy mother and child. Not that they'll necessarily be at the birth, but they will know and remember that babies can be born at home without fuss or drama, and that tearing off to the hospital to be saved by an OB is generally not necessary. They will remember that when the time comes for their own babies. That's a gift to them too.

Does that help?

[Cricket]

Double post.

[Jennifer13]

You ARE spending this money on your kids! This new bub and the others too, if they're able to be there and/or also benefit from how both you and bub are after the birth. Best thing you can do for your new addition is bring them into the world this way.

[TeniBear]

Yay, first appointment booked with the midwives, another booked with their doctor so I can get the official referral, and I've opened a new bank account specifically for birth money It's starting to come together!

I felt I should open the new account because I'm hopeless at keeping my grubby hands off of money while I'm trying to save - it's with a different bank than my usual accounts and I've made it so I have to go in to withdraw any money I wish I could've gone for a "Christmas Club" account so I could only access it in November/December, but there'll be other expenses and fees we'd need to cover before then.

Agh, I'm so excited! Before now it felt like the homebirth - and the baby itself - was sort of a dream, but now it's moving towards reality and I'm just so happy

[Arimeh]

Thanks for the different perspectives guys I guess its easy to forget this isn't just my birth!

And now I have a little boy in my belly! I can't believe after 3 girls we got given a boy - by accident!