I dunno just hard to get around the fact its money spent on me and not my kids.
Are you not delivering a kid with this money? You're bringing that baby into his/her own home, into gentle hands, not to be taken away from you or left on the warming table, etc. You're giving that baby a homebirth too, not just you.

And, you are showing your other children what birth can and should be for a healthy mother and child. Not that they'll necessarily be at the birth, but they will know and remember that babies can be born at home without fuss or drama, and that tearing off to the hospital to be saved by an OB is generally not necessary. They will remember that when the time comes for their own babies. That's a gift to them too.

Does that help?