Well i sent a rambling email to the lovely MW that was my homebirth MW with Tom but rememeber she missed the birth cause it was so quick... Please remember i wrote this in the middle of the night and hit send without re reading incase i then didnt send it!
Dear ^&%&%$%#$,
Wow where has the time gone???
How are you? How was your trip to &*^^$% ? Amazing?? I bet.
Well i think the below is going to be a bit of a dribble so please hold in there
Well i am 28weeks today Holy cow, best start trying to get my head around the idea that this is really going to happen
I have been on a bit of a rollercoaster as to what to do with the delivery of this little one.
As you know there was a lot of stress around DS birth with DH being away and missing DD2 birth. I am not proud of the way i handled myself or the situation. Maybe i am remembering it a little worse than it was but mum assures me that no, it wasnt very nice....
Not sure i mentioned it to you but i went and saw the OB that did the Op for the ectopic at the start of this pregnancy. His advice was to be induced at 36 yes 36 weeks and have steriods OMG no thank you. So dumped him rather quickly. The found out that the OB that was so supportive at the redlands public hospital had gone private so i thought it might be a good idea to see her. Well you guessed it not so supportive now she gets paid the big bucks. 36weeks inducement or a hospital stay until baby is born! Hello i have 3 other kids that i never leave and you want me to teach them that a mummy needs to stay away for 2 or more weeks waiting in hospital for a baby! Thank you but no i wont be seeing you again either...
Pubic hospital. Explained my delema over fast & early labours. Dr seems nice and just said dont plan on being at home (risk to me and baby blaa blaa blaa) but to just call and ambulance...... Then i get to my next MW appointment at the hospital and she is reading to me that the Dr has written "for induction at 36weeks"!!
So where does that leave me! Well homebirth of course but the only thing that is stopping me is the cost. Since we have moved we have a much bigger morgage and the money is just not there... And I also have the huge thought that if we have paid you, DH and i to a certain extent will be putting me under pressure to call in time to have you here.... I totally understand why you get paid your full amount even if you miss the birth, i am not asking you to do anything special for us. But just trying to limit that same negitive pressure that were on me when i had Thomas.
So where does that leave me... Well to some extent at ease with the fact that this baby has a right to choose where and when it comes, which yes probably means a free birth. Either are home or BILO hehe. Free birth - NOT something i thought i would ever concider or do.
But I also do NOT want to call an ambulance. I feel that i have more experience and infact probably DH does than they would. I do not need some actioned ready stranger at my birth or rushing me after.
SO (i did warn you that this would be a boring dribble) what i am asking you is would you? do you? do just post natal care? or pre and post but not birth? would this/could this include the birth cert paperwork? I really really dont want my girl to think mummy has to take baby to hospital after. I just want to lie in bed with my family and enjoy our new baby.
Can you please (and i know its a lot to ask you out of your time) take the time to tell me your optinions on what i have written.
I know as a professional you can not support a freebirth. I agree with you but in reality after 2 very quick births this baby really is going to come when its ready and on its own time. That is something i can not control and feel better admiting to myself than trying to control it with medical intervention.
Thank you %^$$#$, you really are a lovely person and i respect you,so i look forward to hearing from you, i hope,
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