It's sad for women who want to bf but can't for a genuine reason. But it's also sad that many who could bf with the right information and support didn't get the opportunity. And it's sad that many women feel ashamed to bf in public - espeically with toddlers. There is no easy answer here, but I do think bf needs to become more socially acceptable and there needs to be more education.

All I knew of bfing before DS was born was that most of my friends with kids had had problems with attachment and most had gone on to ff. A couple of weeks before DS was born, a conversation with an interstate friend of mine changed things. She is the mum of 3 and a dietician and ABA member. She asked me if I was planning to bf. I said I was going to try. I admit it - I was expecting defeat before I'd even started. She told me that most early problems can be overcome and insisted I ring her before giving up on bfing. She also bought me a gift membership to the ABA.

This was probably the difference between me bfing and ffing. When DS was born with a tongue-tie, he was unable to attach and would scream with hunger while we tried. The first few days were very difficult as we tried lots of different things. Luckily we did have success with nipple shields the night before I left hospital. Jack's tongue-tie was snipped when he was 3 weeks and we went on to feed successfully without nipple shields until he self-weaned at 14 months (probably due to my pg). We fed through two bouts of mastitis, my return to work, and other nipple problems. I would never have done this without my friend's assurances that it would get easier, and the fantastic support of the ABA.

How many other women out there would love to successfully bf but are not given the information, encouragment and support they need? I guess what I'm trying to say is that we need to be sensitive to the feelings of those who are the 5 % who genuinely can't bf. But this shouldn't stop us from trying to increase bfing rates and raising awareness of bfing and the support available. And we certainly shouldn't be hiding the fact that we are bfing or feeling embarrassed about it. We should be proud!

Please, if I haven't worded this well, don't take offence. There is none intended.

Melanie