Just as an aside, I would recommend having children in your early 20s if both parents are in a stable relationship and want this - your body has finished growing (this is why teen pregnancies, especially in early teens, can be bad; mum needs nutrients that baby needs too), you are adaptable so life with a baby isn't the end of the world, you've done the whole pub-and-club scene and know you aren't missing out there, you're well-educated (as opposed to taking time off for baby during your exam time), you don't have to worry about a "career break", you have energy even if baby doesn't sleep all night, you don't miss what you never had (expensive child-free holidays, sports cars, loads of me-money)... I know that I'd really resent my child not sleeping through and puking everywhere if we'd waited much longer!
Of course, if you want to go out and have pre-baby fun still, you should wait. Although I do miss the sports car, I know the baby is better and we still havetime to get another one in about 20 years and not look too bad in it!
Oh yes, and be aware of the poo/puke/screams/sleeplessness... it's expected. And know that your child learns from example, so if you want the baby not to do something you want to, do it now! For example, I make sure DS sees reading as better than TV, even if it means forcing DH to read before DS goes to bed sometimes!
BTW, DS is cheaper than I thought, I was expecting him to be dead expensive from the outset... as I know he doesn't *need* 50'000 toys or 10'000 outfits it's working out quite well. It gets worse later, just be aware of that!
You know what I think the hardest thing is here, Leocalantae? You can't live your life twice and see which version you prefer LOL!! I met my DH in Yr 12 and we have been together since 1st year uni and married since 3rd year. We were married 12 years before Flynn was born, and that was perfect timing for us. We have ALWAYS wanted children and since the early days spoke about names, discipline styles, how we'd raise them, etc. But for us having children early was never an option because of my career. Now I was lucky in that I pretty well got pg quickly, and this time with TTC#2 we struck gold the first month we tried. But there are a lot of women who wait and leave it too late. I think if I was still TTC#1 I would have grave regrets about my decision to delay having a child for so long.
The only thing I would add as a rider (and this will probably get me shot down in flames but it comes from watching my mum in her life and I not not trying to criticise others) is this: if you put your whole being and life into your children (or in mum's case, child) one day they will grow up and want to leave you and you risk feeling very alone in the world. My mum was widowed at 36 and so put EVERYTHING into me, her one and only. It was very hard for her when I left home at 19 and got married at 20 and she hated my DH initially because he was taking me away from her. That placed me under a big burden - it is hard to feel like you are the only thing that is important in your mother's life, especially when you are trying to forge a life for yourself.
So even if you don't have a career, and even if you do have kids young, personally I think you should invest in YOURSELF as much as you do in your children. Children need a mummy who is happy in herself, not just in them, if you know what I mean. Also, having a mum and a dad in a stable relationship is great too - it sounds like you and your partner should enjoy a bit of eachother away from school and parents. Not so you "know" he is the one, because it sounds like you are sure on that one, but because you deserve some couple time. You two can spend time getting to know how you two work as a unit, because as the girls here will tell you there ain't much time for that nce a bub comes along LOL!! Best of luck with your decision making though - I am not trying to sway you either way, because the two of you can do anything you like together if you work at it.
its nice to see ppl repling and everyone has so many good points like i agree with a lot of them. no one has to worry bout swaying me on descions, im mean im gonna always want to have kids i think its an amazing thing. plus i jus thought as well my career choice neway that im at tafe doing is graphic design n i mean u can work from newhere doing that. i think im gonna freak at any age i have to tell my parents. lol i jus find that theres no point getting into anything if ur not passionate about it. if ur hearts not in what ur doing then its not worth it. id rather do somethnig love then slave away for no point just because my parents told me i need a career and i need all this other stuff
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