Honestly, am i crazy??

[myturn]

oh sweetheart! I totally fear that I will do that too!!!! It's awful! People just don't understand - they think you are jealous.... but it's not that at all!! I was saying this in the LTTTC & AC thread (I think it was there!!) just the other day.... family in particular, think you 'should' be able to put your feelings aside and 'suck it up' for your sister/brother.... and it's not that simple!!!

I have already told my mum, that if someone else gets preg this year - I will NOT be happy! This year is MY year! cause it's not fair. Why do so many people get preg easily - who don't really care/ or don't look after/ or are just doing it because it's the done thing.....?

the truth is... we all feel like this... we do understand! And I would never have expected this to happen. Other people, can imagine and have empathy - but they can never truely "get it".

come and join us in the IVF threads - it's really nice in there (and I never expected to be a 'forum' person.... but its amazing how much better I feel for doing this)

[grub17]

second that Myturn. the ivf threads were such a great support to me during our time having/trying for babies.

there are ladies there who i genuinely call my friends. i've never met them or their bubs but i feel close to them for what we went through...

and they understand your point of view and are some of the funniest ladies you'll meet lol. there are just some things IVFers need to do that aren't normal - things in your butt and up your twat, cottage cheese coming out your jay jay and such joys! there is only a select group of people who can truly understand the grace of these procedures!

[myturn]

there are just some things IVFers need to do that aren't normal - things in your butt and up your twat, cottage cheese coming out your jay jay and such joys! there is only a select group of people who can truly understand the grace of these procedures!

so true grub!!!

[Miss.B]

Oh roller, you are neither silly or crazy! I fact, I have so much admiration for you hun, I think it would be awful to be trying for so long with no luck. And even harder with other pg women and little babies. I can understand the hurt you are feeling about not being able to meet your brother's baby, it would be extremely hard. Especially as they weren't even planning it, whereas you've been planning every snif, jab and poke. It's simple hun, unless you've been through IVF you will never understand what it's all about. I wish no one had to go through it. In your brother and SIL's case, I think it was pretty insensitive to announce their happy news to you in front of everyone else. They should have told you in private. I would have definitely appreciated it that much more. Some people don't think, some are just insensitive, they are not tuned into what we are going through, to get what they obviously are able get so easily, and without trying!! It's just not fair. I wish you all the luck in the wold with this cycle hun. I really hope it's going to be a nice BFP for you. Big hugs hunni and stay strong! Human spirit is hard to break and we are much, much stronger than we think .

[Mich8]

Oh rollercoaster, I got teary reading your post. I completely understand and am in the same situation ... and also don't know what to do
Just don't beat yourself up over it because that doesn't help anyone. If you can't see them, you can't!

My partner's sister announced her pregnancy (at 7 wks) on the day of my first miscarriage. While she was preg I had another miscarriage and her beautiful little boy was born 2 weeks after my baby should have been (first grandchild too!) That baby is now nearly 1 and I still find it difficult to see him - worst thing is, they live on the same street as us!! My partner spends at least an hour a day with his nephew and I see him maybe every 2 months

On one hand, if you do decide to see the baby, maybe you'll deal with it better than you think. I find I feel ok and can hold myself together while I'm with them but then feel pretty down afterwards. If you can't do it, maybe you could meet with your brother or his gf without the baby and explain it all to him/ her because your relationship with them is important - and it's not their fault. Oh and I send them gifts for the baby quite a lot through my partner which hopefully lets them know that I care, I just can't be there.

You're not alone. And you're not crazy, you're human and sometimes you just need to pretect yourself from pain overload!! Thinking of you