DD hasnt seen her sister

[tan32]

My sweet DD is a loving caring 9 yr old, when she was 1 her Dad left us, I have her full time, although he does have her once a fortnight for the day. I have sinced remarried and moved on, My loving DH has been with us since DD was 2 and has lived with us since she was 3. She now calls him Dad and they love each other dearly. We have added to our family with a DS who we refer to as her brother.
Her biological Dad has a partner and a daughter with her. She also has 4 daughters from previous relationships. The problem is my DD has not seen her step sister for 2 years and her Dad is not helping by dropping everything to run and be with his new daughter.
There have been issues with his partner and my DD , my DD has been spat on , locked outside and numerous other events, needless to say that she is not allowed to go to his parners house. He takes her to his Mums house and they stay there. But his partner refuses to allow him to take his other daughter around or even to a park with my DD . What do i do, my DD thinks that her Dad doesnt love her anymore and has chosen the newer daughter over her.

[Pandora]

oh that sux. I'm not in the best position to give advice as I've not been in that position, but want to give you a
It must be hard to tell her the truth, without seeming to be blaming out your Xs partner (even if its the truth). I think he is the one who needs to push this issue with his partner, its his daughter too (the younger one) after all not just his partners. He sounds like he lets her walk all over him by the description of her behaviour.
I think its good that he sees your daughter when he does, and makes the effort to do this in a safe environment, so he obvioulsy wants them to have a relationship. He needs to step up and take responsibilty for the relationship between both his daughters though, he needs to make it happen.
What sort of relationship do you have with him, is he open to discussing this sort of thing?

[Kitt3n]

oh, you poor thing - i am in a pretty similar situation so my heart goes out to you.

DD's "dad" and i broke up when she was 3. She is now 7 and my df has been with us pretty much ever since the breakup, and she calls him dad.

her "dad" has since had a little bubba and my dd loves her dearly - but she hates her step brother who is the same age as her - kicking, spitting.... sounds like a parrallel universe!

DD doesnt want to go there to sleep anymore because of this - she just wants to hang our with her dad for a day every no and again and for him to bring the baby. her "dad" hasnt seen or spoken to dd in four weeks. she doesnt even bother anymore. i think she has realised it hurts her too much to try - which really sux for a 7 year old.

all i can do is tell her that daddy does love her very much but its just hard for him to organise her, baby, step son - and re assure her that wwe al love her very much. its all i can do.

stay strong - your dd will need a big soft cuddle and spongy shoulder to cry on, unfortunately its all we can really do.