Hoping for 4 kids - too late?

[Bloom]

Hello there,

I'm after advice from larger families.

Here's my situation. I'm married (5 years) and currently 25 (almost 26). I can't start TTC until I'm 26 and 6 months due to travel plans. I also suspect that it will take as a while to conceive. So, I've been playing with the idea of having at least 3 but maybe 4 kids. I'd like a reasonable gap between babies, particularly after the first one (I think, obviously don't know as I haven't experienced parenthood yet). I also don't think i'd like to be an older mum. My mum was pregnant with my younger brother when she was 34 and she said she felt too old and tired (I'm sure everyone is different so no offense to older mums, that's just what my mum has told me about her experience).

So what made you decide to have 4 kids?

AND have I left it too late? How can I decide about timing?

I know it seems I'm stressing over nothing but we do like to plan for the future!

[erinjacob]

im younger then u but i have 3 kids an 1 due in april my kids are around 15 months apart. u can have 4 kids with a 2yr gap it all depends on how fast u get pregnant how u cope an if you want more i would wait till you have ur first then decide but it can be done.

[aussienic]

I have 4 kids.. I did start at 23 or was I 22 We had a 4 year gap between our first and second then popped one out every 2 years after that...

I think it is one of those things you just have to wait and see. YOu migtht have 2 and know within yourself that 2 is enough...

good Luc on your journey..

[Trillian]

Honestly, age is only a state of mind. I know women who have started parenthood in their late 20's and had as many kids as they wanted - some had 2, others more. Once you start you might find you want a closer age gap. If you *feel* like you can handle it, then age shouldn't stop you kwim? So I don't think it is too late at all.

[Heaven]

If you want to get pregnant quickly when you start TTC, I would suggest getting the Implanon removed earlier as that could help.
I was on the pill and have been off it for 6 months now and my cycles are STILL all over the place. I have heard from a lot of other people on here that implanon is even worse and it can take a while for your cycle to get back to normal, making it difficult to conceive.
Just a thought, hope that helps. If I had known what the pill would do to my cycle I would have gone off it a year before TTC, or better yet never started taking it at all!!
Good luck!

[Emma1979]

hey there, i want four kids and i had my first when i was 27 turning 28, now 10 months later im no where near ready for a second baby, but somehow if it is meant to be, i will fit 4 babies in.... my partner only wants two, so not sure how it is all going to work out!? we also have travel plans for this time next year, so there will be a fair gap between my first and second... just have to wait and see how it all pans out.... best of luck, i wouldn't worry too much yet, just take it one baby at a time!!

[Bloom]

Hey all, thanks for your great advice and reassurance.

Sarajane - I'm actually due to get the implanon out this Friday so we will have until late May for my cycle to get back into order. I'm planning on starting to chart as soon as AF returns even though we won't be TTC till May/June (is that odd?).

Emma - thanks for your good advice, seeing as we are in similar situations...

Sherie - thanks too for your wise words.

[Kitt3n]

hi ruth,

i wasnt on implanon but i was on depo and it has taken ages for my body to bounce back. i actaully think that the depo (stopped taking over 2 years ago) had something to do with my mc's cos when af returned after depo my period only went for 2 or so days, and i didnt need to change a pad all day, just "litlle dribbles" (soz TMI!!!)

but, afer this second MC, i just got my second AF and there was actaully a decent flow!

i heard it can take 6-12 months after implanon to get AF - it took me about 5 after depo.

good luck with your TTC journey!!

[~Jo~]

I think you can make the best of any situation Ruth..so if you want 4 kids then go for it!!! I had my first 3 at 20, 22 and 24, with Dh having a vasectomy and then consequent reversal several years later to have Sammy at 31. I love both having the kids close together, but also having the experience of a 6 year gap as well. I honestly think you can make the best with what you choose/get dealt with, so go for it!!!

Jo

[Heaven]

Oh that's good that you're getting it out early, in your sig it says April 08. That will give u more time to get your body back in order.
Starting with charting is a really good idea, not odd at all, then you will have a better idea of when you ovulate and what your signs for ovulation are and you'll be able to time DTD better!!

[Bloom]

Oops! Thanks for the reminder re signature. I'll go change it now.

Awww Jo - sounds like you have a beautiful family !Congrats. : )

[didlesdines]

I have 3 and would like 5, I will most likely have to the large gap, waiting for doctors approval, like it has been said before age is a state of mind, I have my first no more than 2.5yrs apart and thats been good, yes hard work but good, but with a larger gap they can help out like my miss did little things like can you bring mummy a nappy and things they feel really needed.

[Trillian]

Ruth, it's not strange to chart well before you actively TTC. It gives you time to fully understand your cycles and iron out any kinks you might have kwim?