Oh I'm not shirty, in fact I'm sitting here with a nice cold one listening to the rain on the roof. The 'power' of the typed word with no facial expression I suppose

I've not been in this situation before but I do feel for your hubby I suppose. He is clearly insecure about this guy and really - going by your past posts about him (the ex) you have really fought hard to maintain the 'friendship', and it seems potentially at the expense of both your marriages.

You defend the other bloke far harder than your hubby. Don't you think dh has real reason to be insecure?