Do we have to buy a present?

[C~Q]

I thought i'd get some opinions on this as I'm not sure what the proper etiquette is. We are going to a friends 30th party next weekend. It's fancy dress and everyone is going all-out. Last night we got a group email saying wine is on the house (it's in a hotel) but everything else you have to pay for. Also they are not putting on any food. DH is pretty ****ed off as we are paying nearly $200 for our costumes and it is quite typical of them to never cough up for anything (example; "come over for a BBQ - bring meat, booze and salad!").

What I want to know is should we buy her a pressie as well? As I said we are spending nearly $200 on costumes (our choice but EVERYONE is making a big effort), it's on the Coast so we'll have to get a cab home or stay. Luckily my Dad is over from the UK so we don't have to pay for a babysitter. If it was my party I wouldn't expect anyone to buy me anything as well.

What do you think?

[briggsy's girl]

i'd grab her a card, and that's it! there is no obligation to buy a gift for any occassion, but if you're forking out so much for the night, there's really no need to buy a gift!

my brother is having hi 30th next month - is putting on food and beer for everyone, and has specifically requested no gifts from anyone!

have a great night out, and don't feel obliged to do something that will make you unhappy!

[mrsmac]

I would just get her something little like a card and a lottery ticket or a small bunch of flowers if they are paying for wine.

[Ashlee]

I agree, a card and a scratchie would be plenty. What is the theme by the way, I love dress up parties, my DH is having a Camouflage theme for his this year!

[dusty]

goodness no, not if you don't want to. obligatory presents are for kids IMO but as adults we probably accumulate more than we need anyway. hope you have a great night!

[C~Q]

Thanks guys, that makes me feel better. The theme is Animation so i'm going as Batgirl and DH is Batman! I'll get her a card then with a scratchie