Registered User
You need to be honest with her. Does she know her DS is like this with your DD?
I don't work but rely on my friends quite often to look after my 2 kids & they also do the same with me. I would be gutted if they made up an excuse as to why they couldn't/wouldn't look after my kids. Despite her seeming like she isn't an organised person in regards to childcare for her children, I don't think you need to be hard on her. She probably just needs to be told is straight, she might not realise how it seems?!
Registered User
She needs to get her **** together, not only totally annoying for all the friends she gets to babysit but how disrupting for the kids to feel like they are being dumped here there and everywhere all the time, they need stability! Yep, tell her the truth and hopefully it will prompt her into getting organised.
Registered User
Just tell her the truth - lies always catch you out eventually.
Registered User
Wow
Harsh, I think considering we don't know her circumstances.
Sent from my iPhone
Registered User
Wow! So you wouldn't help a friend out?!
For me, if a friend needs a hand & I can help out I sure as eggs will. Even if it means my day is interrupted.
I'm kinda not getting the whole narkiness thing here. Maybe because I'm in this whole disorganized category
BellyBelly Member
Not knowing her circumstances, and assuming she just doesn't want to pay for Childcare, I think that is VERY annoying, however, we dont know her circumstances, but regardless of circumstances, i think it is quite slack that she constantly chops and changes where the kids are every day, you'd think that you might ask friends/family etc. whether its possible for them to take care of the children on a more regular basis, whether its one day a week every week, or more.
Like a PP said, IMO they do need stability, especially seeing as (i assume) she works 5 days a week, and organises someone to take care of the kids, every day, not once a week for the week for something, thats very careless IMO.
But, i don't know her circumstances, maybe she can't afford Childcare, and doesnt have family who she can pay less than a child care?
but i think that someone needs to say "no i dont want to" for whatever reason, so she may start to see that she is burdening people by dumping their kids at the last minute (pre-arranged is a different story) by people who are probably doing it because they feel they have to, rather than want to.
Registered User
Asking your friends to look after your kids on an ad-hoc basis is one thing, ie, dentist appointment, whatever, but if you are working then IMO you do need to have some regular care organised not just seeing 'who can babysit the next day'. But your right we don't know her circumstances but to help herself out maybe she does need to look into some CC or FDC to help ease the stress for herself of rushing around trying to get babysitting at the last minute.
Registered User
Is she a good friend or a fair weather friend.
I babysit a lot. I already have four so what's one or two more. I never use to mind until it just got out of control. I was doing things for other people every day. I wasn't working and we were finding that tough yet I was providing free babysitting everyday do others could go on holidays, seemed really unfair and especially when the favour is never returned.
There are some friends that I would change my plans for or others that I could just take they kids along with me. But there is a few that just use use use me. So now I only babysit when it suits my kids. if they would benefit from a play date then sure I'll babysit. If I don't want to I just say no! Really I don't need to waste my time making lies up. I'm an adult. I have a busy life too just cause I don't work doesn't mean I'm not busy too.
Good luck with whatever you decide.
Registered User
don't think I'm being at all narky. I think if you want to go and earn money you should expect to pay for childcare and you should respect your friends enough not to use them up.
I am more than happy to help a friend out if they need it and I have cared for other people's kids quite often for various reasons but I'd draw the line at being free childcare esp if it puts me out or makes the day difficult for me. If someone is out earning then it shouldn't be up to a friend to have their day re-organised so the person dumping kids has more income.
CC is important it's not something that should be thrown together at the last minute unless it's an emergency.
If this person is starting a new job and is not organized yet then perhaps this is OK in the very short term but it doesn't read as though this is the case.......sounds like a serial kid dumper to me. " she doesn't have a set plan....."
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