... All your responses were so heart warming & i'm so overwhelmed by all your thoughtful suggestions.
Two reasons why DP & i didn't refuse this rude woman a seat was Firstly we didn't know what our rights were ' if ' we actually HAD TO ... and Secondly we could see she was clearly getting ready to debate it & we had a long way still to travel on our train journey to Melb and didn't want an ugly situation happening all that way.
Sadly were she pushed me was right in the area of my shoulder blade were i have had extensive physio treatment ... and i felt so bad for DP as he was complaining of his right knee causing him severe pain during the week.
DP made me laugh as he said i should have just fallen to the ground & screamed for help that i'd been attacked rather then save myself from triping as i did loose my footing as the push was that hard.
Also THANKU to those that noticed in the manner in which i conducted myself. I used my manners, was polite, never swore, never insulted (well, actually i did but she didn't know that when i mentioned she is of mature age & should know better) and i never physically touched her nor pushed her and i never got within her personal space. Oh and i never yelled UNTIL she pushed me. My Mum always taught me it takes a much stronger person to contain & try to control their unnecessary actions like swearing, insulting or physical violence AS it only brings you down to that other persons level ... and YOU have just become THEM so what good did you get out of it yourself. I would rather chose to feel proud of myself then ashamed. To know me i'm not of a meek character but actually the opposite. Even DP's Dad after he met me for the 1st time years ago said i have b@lls to other people when they asked what i'm like BUT he apparently said it in a way of respect as to be a strong person you need NOT be a cruel or rude person.
Life is far to short to be surrounded by these sorts of people but sadly they ARE there so it's best to make your point & make it of fair reasoning then it's time to walk away as YOU don't want to waste another moment in the presence of a person of such ill-manner whom doesn't grasp that they may have possibly done something wrong to another human being !!!
Don't get me wrong i'm no angel i too have had moments in life where i have felt my fist clenching getting ready to want to punch but i use every ounce of ' good ' in me to get past that point. And i have to admit to feel that was frightening & i haven't gone there with that feeling in a long time. For that i feel especially proud and hope that my DD has that quality within her too (thanks to her Grandma's too).
****** I will keep you all updated IF i hear anything from V/line what my rights, etc are as a train passenger. ******
I was thinking next time to maybe buy my DD a ticket but i could most likely still have someone expect her to give up her seat even if she has a ticket and paying a Full-Fare ticket for her is just insane & out of the question ... remembering my ticket is not metropolitan but a much more expensive V/Line ticket.
Thank you all again ... and i'm still welcome to any more ideas xox
P.S - seats on this train are not priority nor allocated seating to give you all an idea. The woman in question her ticket would have been classed as a Metropolitan ticket as she boarded in suburbia Melb (i know as i've caught the train from her station before).
Reacted with all the class and dignity I have come to know from you Lorelle my firend well done!
WHy is it that 'older people' seem to think manners are only for use by younger people? Respect is earned not demanded. Nasty cow she sounds. You technically have yourself an assault there (you were walking away) but the chances of it going anywhere are pretty much nothing. Sorry mate.
I agree with the others though. How does that woman know that you didn't pay for her?
... Kim, she truely had a magical day as she didn't witness anything said or done to me as i asked DP to remove her from the train when we arrived in Melb before i approached the woman ... he said he didn't ask me WHY as he could see the look on my face i was getting into the ' composed Lorelle action mode ', LOL ... he so knows how to read me
(Kim thank you for a compliment that means the world to me coming from such a wonderful & respected person ... that's you Kim )
Yeh, DP also said technically she did assault me ... i can only laugh now that he also said i should have put on my acting skills from my days of being on tv commercials and have made it a real drama ... (wish i could have rolled on the floor laughing yesterday BUT it was an upsetting start to our Family day out but i by far didn't let it be ruined in the end !!)
You reacted in a way that would've made my mother proud. She always used to tell us that there is no point yelling and swearing at someone and that the best way is to be calm and come back at them with the truth. That a "mature" woman should know better. Even though you meant it in a spiteful way she had nothing to come back with because she knew it was true.
I totally agree... you give no emotion and they just don't know how to handle it. I've been pondering this an awful lot, I too would think given you had a v-line ticket and she had simply a metro ticket that your seat was more valid than hers. But maybe thats my warped way of thinking.
... Rouge i'm so glad you bought that up as i mentioned the exact same thing to DP !!
Rouge, you & i can have ' warped minds ' together, LOL
I did show emotion in sounding & looking upset which would be natural to anyone BUT the key is to not show emotions in an aggressive way like them ... they look confused & simply don't get it ... to me that has always proved that people like that are just simply NOT NICE and more than likely have some deep seeded issue within themself !!
Someone recently said to me that just some people it has something to DO with their unbringing, etc & to accept that ... I for one WILL NEVER accept that as an EXCUSE cause if anyone knew my background they would be mind-blown-away and it has never turned me into a nasty person in life, if anything it has taught me a higher level of compassion towards other.
Funkeefrog i'm so glad you mentioned the word spite as i needed to hear that ... i have been spiteful maybe one other time in my life & i still feel ashamed of that all these years later ... yesterday i think i was so desperate after having been physically pushed and touch by this woman i was clutching at straws !! FF, thanks for being so supportive
I think you handled yourself well I think you stood your ground well which is also important emotion or not! And hey don't think for one second I'm perfect either... I've yelled at woman in the car park for accusing me of being a neglectful parent for being roughly 5 paces away from my car (DH was leaving the car and I was going towards it). I felt bad for yelling in front of my kids but the old biddy was being absolutely ridiculous and my temper and mother bear instincts got the better of me. The funny thing is I think it all relates back to our protective mechanisms. I bet if that woman had spoken to you like that you would have brushed it off completely, but the fact is she was rude to your CHILD and thats simply not on
And there is nothing wrong with having a warped mind...
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