Just wondering, in advance, re an appropriate way to express appreciation to a wonderful obstetrician. Will thank her in the birth notice, but wanted to know if it is generally ok to give ob a gift of chocolates or flowers? (or any other suggestions?) as a token of my great appreciation for all her time and care of me and baby?
I think that generally a card and photo aren't unusual, and I'm sure that flowers and/or chocolates wouldn't be considered over the top. I think that they'd be a nice gesture.
We gave our OB a lovely card with a photo of the girls in it and my sister owns her own florist and did a groovy bouquet of flowers which she loved.We also thanked her when we put the girls birth notice in the paper.
After the girls birth DH was waiting outside the hospital with my mum as she was waiting for my sis to pick her up.My OB was leaving and DH called her over and gave her a big hug.Yes we really appreciated her.
Hi Berry,
What the !@#$!@ were you doing up at 3.30 this morning?? Never mind, I was up at 4.30...so who am I to talk?
I hope I can give you some good insight on this. We are friends with two obstetricians and have discussed this subject with them before.
First of all, they love being thanked, even if it's just a card after the fact or at the 6 week checkup. The positive feedback is very rewarding. They often don't see the notices in the newspaper, but they will always see a card and usually display it in their rooms. There seems to be some difference whether people go private or public. (I know you are private.) On the private side, many patients have the attitude of, 'I have already paid you,' and don't do anything further. I think that's a shame really. Both doctors have told me that on the public side, people tend to do a bit more because they know their care was free and that the doctor doesn't "have to" give them special attention.
People often give chocolates or flowers. This is definitely not only OK, but very much appreciated. Sometimes a few of the nicer bakeries will do a "bouquet" of cookies or cakes. The good part about these gifts is that the office staff (midwives/secretaries) usually share in it.
Both doctors have told me they have also received wine, hampers from DJ or Myer, or gift vouchers for a good restaurant. Something like this is often given when the mother has needed quite a lot of TLC along the way, or if something unusual happens at delivery.
A friend whose husband is a doctor told me that her dh gave the OB a bottle of Grange!
Apart from all of that, I also sent my obstetrican a thankyou letter a year after...he had got me through a situation where he needed every ounce of his years of expertise. He immediately wrote a note back to me, saying that my thankyou had made his day!
Anything you do will be very much appreciated. Good doctors are worth thanking!
To be honest, I don't think anything other than a simple "thank you" is necessary. My OB was great - he looked after me throughout my pregnancy and was there when I delivered a beautiful baby girl. He was there for two, yes two, contractions - my daughter arrived with the second. And he was paid - handsomely.
On the other hand, my midwife stayed 2.5 hours after her shift change because she thought it was inappropriate to leave me when I was so close to giving birth after having spent the day supporting me. She was told in no uncertain terms by the chief nurse (don't know what the correct term is) that she would not be paid for her extra time and she should just leave it to the new shift. She stayed and was incredibly supportive - both to me and my DH, and she basically delivered my little girl and only stepped aside so the OB could "take the glory". She was definitely worthy of flowers, champagne and chocolates.
Thanks for taking the time to give me your ideas - very helpful; sometimes I need to check re etiquette!! My ob has been really outstanding in her dedicated management of my complicated pregnancy, and I agree that good obstetricians should be acknowledged...
PS - Castle, it isn't unusual for me to be up at 3.30am lately! I have sought assistance with my insomnia lately and have been given a relaxation CD which promises to lull you into a wonderful sleep pattern. I might try it tonight!
Apparently in about 7 months I will be a qualified midwife - yikes!
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I gave my Ob a Special Reserve bottle of Pinot Noir, which he said he liked ( did check with his secretary though that he liked wine and red or white.
I had a difficult first birth, for which I was very thankful I had a experienced Ob, and with my 2nd he did all of the things I asked including an induction at my own request.
With my 3rd he only made it in time to deliver the placenta, but that was totally not his fault as I was only at hospital for 15 mins before he was born, and it was the middle of the night. It was so quick my DH nearly missed it as he went to take a phone call.
I always do a thankyou card with a photo of him with the bub as well.
Not sure what I will do this time, he has been very supportive throughout a difficult time during my pregnancy, so will have to think on that!
I'll probably give my Ob something like a card and a photo, but want to give my FS something special....not sure what yet. He totally deserves it, he is a wonderful and compassionate Dr. I will also write him a note. He helped me through a very difficult time in my life and I want to make sure he knows how grateful I am.
At my obs rooms there are gifts all over the place - lots and lots of framed pictures of him and babies, lots of ornamental/statue type things with mothers and babies, he has one of a stork delivering a baby that is gorgeous, he even has a few paintings.
I guess I'll see how I feel after the delivery and how good he was!! LOL!
After Olivia we made up a basket of coke and choocolate and scotch...(his known faves!) and a thank you letter. He was a legend at her birth, despite shoulder distocia, and I had a blissful birth. (I also orgnaised a voucher for a restaurant for my midwife who was just amazing.)
With Charlie we moved interstate during the pregnancy, so saw 2 OB's....so I sent a thank you letter and a photo to my 1st OB, and the same to my 2nd OB (who missed the birth!)
For Lexie, the same OB missed the birth, but I still sent a thank you letter & photo, as he had been fantastic through an emotionally very difficult pregnancy (and CVS etc etc). And my midwife at Lexies birth was phenomenal, so we organised her a restaurant voucher and a thank you letter for her. We had a hug and a happy cry together when I left the hospital!
On all 3 occasions of birth DH also organised a basket of Haighs chocolates for the midwives in the post natal ward.......I was very lucky with all three of my hospital stays that all of the midwives were just lovely, so I am really glad DH organised this for them as a thank you.
Last edited by Lucy; August 16th, 2007 at 08:39 PM.
Apparently in about 7 months I will be a qualified midwife - yikes!
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Well, I played it safe and bought him another bottle of the same wine, with a thankyou card including a special thankyou for the extra support he gave me throughout the pregnancy.
I am a teacher and the best gift/thank you I ever got was a letter from a parent. It expressed her initial concerns and how they passed and what a different I had made in her son's life. I will treasure it forever. It reminds me why I started teaching in the first place and when I am done staying home with my babies I'll read it to remind me why I want to return. I think a heartfelt note means more than chocolates, etc.
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How do you thank your ob?
Never mind, I was up at 4.30...so who am I to talk?
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