Opening something for your child/ren to eat whilst shopping?

[RainbowBrite]

Occasionally I have done it but it is most likely a drink of water or I have used a tissue or a wipe if I forgot mine.
With 3 under 3.5 am in and out of the shop as quickly as I can...I feed them before we go so don't take snacks and they don't eat as we go around.
Though when I buy polony I will asked for a few slices to be left out (after it is weighed) and the kids will eat that...but you pay for it at the deli counter not the checkout.
I am fortunate enough that none of my little ones are tantrum chuckers so I don't really have to contend with that and I make sure I avoid the lolly isle so they aren't tempted.

I am also a very picky packer and will pack things on the conveyor in the order they should be packed...my XDH just used to just throw them on the counter in no order and it used to bug me no end

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

Ohhh i too ask for the ham etc to be weighed first and then have a slice taken out
And with packing i pack things in order too, all boxes in 1 spot, detergent etc together, heavy things first, cold & frozen together, veggies and bread last

[sloane]

i went to an iga a month or so ago instead of the woolies i normally go to & when i got some stuff at the deli, the lady behind the counter actually asked if DS would like a slice of stras or chicken. i'd totally forgotten about that sort of thing - i remember it from when i was little (cept i used to say i'd prefer ham ) but my woolies never does it. i thought it was so nice

[Astrid]

not to mention she was feeding her child Nestle, tut tut tut

Nestle contributes to some of my wages at the moment.

[RhiChiChi]

I often open a packet of pikelets for DS to snack on and grab a diet coke for me to drink as I go. I think if we are talking "moral or immoral" it's about intent. I fully intend to pay (and always have) so don't see a problem. I have never had any staff member query me about it and I shop at all major supermarket chains.

I am the same - My DD usually spots the drinks & wants water, so I let her have a sip & I pay for it at the end of my shop. I don't take DD to the shops much anyway so it is far & few between. I agree with the past about 'intent'

[meow]

I used to open stuff all the time! When I was pregnant I would open a chocolate milk for myself And when shopping with my son I usually always opened something. I shop unpregnant by myself now so it doesn't happen anymore.

[Erin_25]

Some people totally have their head up their you know whats. If my child is hungry and for some reason I don't have any food and we are in a food store I will open food and give it to my child. it has nothing to do with self control or teaching the child anything! It has to do with feeding my hungry child

Yeah that's where I had the disagreement with DH, I open a pack of biscuits I fully intend to pay for and it's always something I was going to get anyway...I am there to get food. If my child is hungry or be it whinging and I need to think before I forget everthing I went there for I will open something (if I don't already have something with me).

But DH agreed children need to wait and learn to wait.

But hey I also think supermarkets should be like pubs, no kids allowed til 18 some days they just kill my shopping mojo!!

[StrawberryFields]

I am curious to know are y'all as anal about how your washing gets sorted and hung on the line?

Yup - Everything has to be pegged out according to fabric type. I don't know why, its just the way my grandmother always did it. Heavy denims need to go on the outside (if its a hills hoist) and then you work your way in to light cottons and linens, and then i always leave the sheets to another day so they don't get in the way of my fabric system. If its one of those straight lines, the heavy fabrics have to go on the side that gets the most air/sun and then I work away from there.

Though, I can't use the line we have at this house because its always in the shade and is useless, so I haven't had this problem at all lately!

Whats really ironic is that I have never, ever, ever, ever separated whites from colours, or towels from clothes or anything like that. The only thing that gets separated is sheets. Everything else goes in together!

I would like to join this group please! I hate it when i load them up the way i want them packed, and some silly check out operator still manages to put my toothpaste with my milk!!!! So frustrating!!!! I should speak up more!!

OOOOOOh that cheeses me off SO much when they do that! Like, you saw me digging through the trolley to put things on the belt heaviest to lightest and in groups of cold, not cold, and not food, why are you ****ing with my system? Don't put it off to the side for another bag, but it in the same bag as the rest of the **** I put on the belt around it.

Another one I hate is when you go to Coles or Woolies to get like, say 6 things, and 3 of them are cold, and 3 of them are not, and they put them in separate bags even though they could all easily fit in one bag. I just say straight up one bag is fine, because I never buy food unless the next stop is home.

Anyway, just had to add another one for the anal bag packers collective!

[Jewel]

I don't, but that's just me. If I get something for the kids they have to wait until it's paid for. It doesn't bother me if people do.
It's completely up to them.

I tend to load up the groceries they way I want them packed. I don't care if they change it to they way they think it should be packed unless they put the meat with the fruit and veg like I've had done a few times.

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

Ah, ya bunch o' whingers. We get no help packing here - just shove it through and I have to do the lot. With DS "helping" me pack. (He has his own bag, into which goes goat's cheese, crisps, hummous, cucumber, carrots, satsumas... any food he has decided he cannot live without.) Must be sooooo annoying to have it done for you but find there's some non-chilled in with the chilled. I still load up the conveyer belt in the order I want it packed. I hate it when they put cards etc into little bags for me to put in a big bag - they must think I'm stupid enough to pack a birthday card next to ice cream or something, despite the fact the card is next to boxed food/magazines/clothes.

FWIW, I detest whinging in shops. So much so that Liebs knows if he whinges in the shops he gets no special food at the till to take home. And I have left unopened crisps, magazines, pretty much anything he has asked for then played up about. Yes, shopping with a toddler screaming and hitting you is no fun - but I have only had to do that 3 times to date. Better than having to face that every time unless I give him food. He gets his own way about other things, but making the weekly supermarket shop difficult for me is not something I give on. (And when Liebs is having a bad day and I know ahead of time, he gets a handheld computer game from home to play in the trolley. Lots of people not liking that one!)

[~StarBright~]

RE: clothes hanging, on the hills hoist i do it by size.. big things go on the outisde and i work my way in so the teeny tiny socks are on the small line. And if i have done a few loads then they get their own section.. dh work section, towels and regular clothes :-)

[Just Me]

OOOOOOh that cheeses me off SO much when they do that! Like, you saw me digging through the trolley to put things on the belt heaviest to lightest and in groups of cold, not cold, and not food, why are you ****ing with my system? Don't put it off to the side for another bag, but it in the same bag as the rest of the **** I put on the belt around it.

That reminds me of earlier this year ... I bought some groceries including cream and she messed with my system and put the cream off to the side to put with other things (don't ask me what) but she forgot to put it in any bag. When I went to use it for a very specific purpose later and it wasn't there I was really cranky. I sent Woolworths a really nasty email (while remembering why I don't shop there anymore) and they sent me a $30 gift card. It pays to complain (I got 4 dinner vouchers to Sizzler last week for writing a complaint to them as well )

[Sopdet]

I felt the same until I was in the middle of dealing with toddler meltdown inc. The good thing is he doesn't expect it when we walk in and I do what I can to avoid situations arising, but toddlers being what they are can throw those curveballs when you least expect. I do it cos it means I can get in and out quickly with as little upset as possible to all involved and also for the sanity of the other shoppers!

I've dealt with the toddler meltdown on numerous occasions, usually 2 going at once (or try 4 going in different directions because they've climbed out of prams/trolleys) and nope we've always stood firm on this. All of us kids, as adults & some with kids of their own now, appreciate the stand that was made.

We've been known to leave one person in the shop with the non-tantrum children and the other leave. When shopping for 7 you need two people shopping if you've got the kids - too much food for one trolley.

I'm going to cause some major hoo-ha over this - but a quick smack use to work wonders for some tantrums.

[Just Me]

I'm going to cause some major hoo-ha over this - but a quick smack use to work wonders for some tantrums.

Now that's a fun can of worms to open up

We don't smack our kids as a rule but I think it is the same as this issue ... each to their own. Everybody manages their kids differently and there is no one right way to do it. You have to do what you think it best. I don't generally do either - smacking or opening food but that is what I think is best for my family (also related to my own issues). You gotta do what you feel is right and manage each situation. I don't walk in your shoes and you don't walk in mine so we can't judge each other. All we can do is offer support and try and understand someone else's perspective understanding that everyone values different things for different reasons. Not because one person has 'better' morals than another, but because we all have different experiences that have shaped our thinking and each of those experiences is valid.

Okay, I'm going to hop off my philosophical high horse now

[christy]

Sorry Sopdet, but a quick smack isn't really a way to deal with tantrums. Or judgement of tantrums really isn't anybodies concerns but the parents. As most people know, but for those who don't, my DD1 is autistic. Sometimes, rarely, I have to take her into the shops. The sensory assault can render her completely unable to regulate her emotions. Today, for example, when I suggested we do something a bit differently to the last time we were there together, she lost it. She started screaming first, and I ignored her, and then she started hitting me. An old biddy suggested I smack her... to which I replied "what about becoming a rational human being is that teaching her? If someone becomes hysterical you hit them? Is it okay to smack you when you get frustrated, when someone puts you into a situation that is mentally and physically painful should you be expected to behave perfectly?".... My DD had completely lost all ability to regulate and grabbing food wasn't going to help her, but the fact that someone chose to suggest smacking made everything 100% worse.

[~clover~]

Sopdet - I won't argue completely. I do believe smacking has a time & a place, & my kids know that. I find I use it more with DD1's disrespect these days than anything.

With DD2 & DS, the problem I've found, is that it can escalate things. DS being alot harder than any of the others.

[Nelle]

I think - with any issue of discipline (meaning teaching), there is context. Willful defiance is one thing, but inability to cope is another. Any kid who is very young, tired, genuinely hungry, has sensory issues or otherwise - that's not their fault, it's not within their ability to control yet. Note that I mentioned 'young' - for those of you with older children, obviously you know what they're capable of and parent accordingly.

In terms of ethics though (assuming it's not illegal and stores are ambivalent on the issue) - it seems clear that there's not an obvious moral absolute here - it's a personal decision about whether you feel it's right or wrong, and also circumstances come into play - what works for your family. No point judging because someone's child has sensory issues (and you won't be able to tell unless they have it tattooed on their forehead), or because the parent is a bit disorganised/unprepared (despite perhaps being a brilliant parent in every other area), or for whatever other reason. Obviously the people feeding their kids in supermarkets aren't doing it to be morally deficient people who bring up morally deficient children - they have their reasons, and who am I to judge the quality of those!

[Pandora]

WRT grocery packing. I remember a uni friend who lived in a share house and they did their shopping together.
They returned a full trolley (i cant remember the price but it was > $300) of groceries because if the way the cashier had packed them.
Tomatoes underneath canned goods etc. And woolies not only accepted the return, they asked for their shopping list and packed and home delivered the lot. She must have made a bit of an impact.

I always put my items up in the order I want them packed.
I do like the way they do it in the UK where you pack your own, and the conveyer belts are generally longer than the teeny tiny amount of space Aldi give you