Just wanted to pop in and say how interesting I'm finding your stories and reasons for not driving!!! I demanded that my mother take me to get my L's the day I became eligible for them, and passed the written test first go (hadn't even cracked the book - this is what happens when you're raised by an ex-rally driver!)... Dad insisted I get my manual licence because 'it will make your life easier being able to drive anything', he and mum owned an auto at the time so he thought it would be best for me to take the exams for a manual licence, learn to handle a car and traffic in an auto, then he went out and bought me a heap of cr@p manual so I could learn clutch/gears without taking on everything at once.
Dad gave me most of my driving lessons, again, he's a very experienced driver and very skilled in defensive driving, so I feel like I had an advantage over my peers whose parents are mediocre drivers or were taught solely how to obey road rules by a driving instructor... I did come a cropper on our first lesson, which of course ended in tears and me screaming at him that I'd 'never drive again!', but I was over it in two hours and ready to get back behind the wheel
I passed my practical exam to get my P's on the first go, too, despite the nerves... it's all mind over matter, it truly is!! So many of my friends psyched themselves out, being paranoid about making tiny mistakes, and they were so worried about missing little things that they made BIG mistakes! I'm the only person I know who has passed their prac exam the first time, I don't know why, I suppose again it just comes down to knowing yourself and believing that you can do it.
Where I live, having a car is pretty much a necessity unless you manage to find a house that's within walking distance of a couple of major amenities - the only public transport available is taxis, or buses during school hours (but even then you can't get on the bus until all the schoolkids have been dropped off so you're restricted to travelling around between 9:30 am and 2:30pm, and the buses stop running on school holidays so there's a good 12 weeks of the year they're not there to take you places), and the town's planners obviously were on acid when deciding where to put shops etc, because everything is sooo spread out and to get your errands done requires driving back and forth all over the place for hours on end... unless you're an accomplished marathon runner there's no way you could get anything done around here without a car or someone to take you somewhere.
So while I think I could probably get away with not having a licence if I lived in a big city, around here it's a real disadvantage to not have a car. I love the freedom that driving gives me, I hate to be reliant upon another person (whether it be DH, my parents, the shoddy public transport system or anything/one else) and I like being able to just chuck DD in the back and go (and, DD's absolute favourite thing in the world is going for drives in the car - it doesn't matter where we end up, as long as she gets to go somewhere in the 'broom-broom'). Before DH and I got together, it wasn't unusual at all for my friends and I to be sitting around on a Friday afternoon after work saying, 'What's on for this weekend?' and then ten minutes later we'd be in the car heading out of town to go stay with friends for a night - it was good to be able to do road trips like that.
I'm a very confident driver, thankfully, and again I think this is my father's influence - my mother has been driving for years but is, let's be honest, a really cr@p driver and a bundle of nerves to boot. She thinks she's an awesome driver because she's never had an accident (okay, never *caused* one) and has only a couple of speeding tix to her name, but being able to putt along at 50 and not run red lights does not a good driver make, imo. Good driving is not about sticking to road rules that accommodate for the lowest common denominator, it's about good reflexes, control of a one-tonne+ lethal weapon, and always expecting somebody else to mess up and put you at risk - too many drivers are complacent, thinking that because *they* are driving in a safe manner, those around them are, too.
That being said, I have had a few minor incidents that could well have been confidence-crushers - thankfully my mistakes have been made on dirt roads while driving alone, testing my own limits and although I've given myself a couple of frights, I now have a better understanding of my personal limits and those of the vehicle I'm driving. Rather than looking at near-misses as a reason to be afraid of driving, I look at it as somewhat empowering.
I find it so interesting to hear from people who don't have licences, for whatever reason (lack of confidence, not necessary, prefer to be free from dependence on a car, etc). It's such an alien concept to me!! I was raised around cars and driving and my parents took me to my first car rally when I was 6 weeks old, so not having a car or a licence is such a weird idea to me... I don't know what I'd do without one!
Fiona, good luck with getting your licence organisedIt's really not that scary, maybe enrol in a defensive driving course as well to give you some extra skills and boost your confidence?
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and I LOVE the independence & being able to do what I want, when I want. This will be my first baby that I have had while being a 'driver' and I can't wait to see what a difference it might make!
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