Yesterday at work my lovely team threw a farewell lunch/party for me and showered me with gifts. They are so delighted for us as this baby, as is DS - were AC via IVF/ICSI
One of the girls in my team, who is the most loveliest girl, has gone through a heartbreaking journey in trying to become a Mum, much harder, tougher and full of disappointments, unlike me who has been lucky enough to had had success. She finally had success and was due only 2 weeks after me, but sadly lost her bub around the 12 week mark.
I felt for her as she had to sit through my team congratulating me, fussing over me, she did so well, and wanted to be there, but towards the end it all became too much and she politely excused herself and left the room. We had a good chat after, she was apologising (which is totally un-neccessary and makes me mad at the universe that she feels has to apologise for feeling the emotions she does) but I have been thinking about her all night, and am so mad at the frigin unfair universe that at times seems so cruel. I know when I wasn't having any success TTC celebrating others pregnancies was excruciatingly hard. I know as her bubs EDD draws close it is going to be a tougher time, and I hate that when she hears of my BA it will again remind her what she doesn't have.
I know there is no right or perfect thing to say/do and I can't 'solve' the situation, but I think I needed to just get it out. I hate watching people in so much pain because their dream to be a Mum is so hard to achieve, or that they may not ever have their much wanted baby. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it!
What an absolutely amazing and kind person you are! So many wouldnt bother with how the other person felt. I dont know what to say but i couldnt not offer one of these I dearly hope she has a forever bub soon too. TTC is so unfair on so many people
:-( It is horrible hearing stories of peoples struggles. One of the guys I sit next to at work, his wife just had a m/c. He told me on Tuesday they were approx. 10 weeks pg but his wife started spotting so they went to get an u/s yesterday to see what was going on & there was just the sac. They think she lost bubs at 5/6 weeks. I just sat there totally crushed for him & his wife and all I could say was 'I'm sorry'. He has to see me twice a week getting fatter by the day whilst they go through another m/c. It is so not fair.
Your work colleague is lucky to have your understanding and compasion. Alot of people just wouldn't bother seeing if she was ok. I hope she gets her wish to become a mother really soon ((hugs))
The universe has a lot to answer for at times, but you've shown kindness, compassion and understanding to this lady which I think would be felt and appreciated by her (well it would if it was me).
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The Emotional Side of Baby Making - I hate it! :(
I dearly hope she has a forever bub soon too. TTC is so unfair on so many people
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