tilygirl - i dont think you sound mental/over-emotional at all. having close family around you being pregnant/talking about getting pregnancy is really hard, there's no getting away from that. its like a constant reminder of everything you've been through, and are still stuggling with. my sister told me that she would wait for me to get pregnant before trying, i told her she was crazy & to try asap bc you never know how long it might take you. took her the first go & she is 7 months pregnant (you're right, it does make you feel inadequate). its not a very sensitive comment for your sister to make, but do you think your sister could've been just saying that to get the relo's/friends off her back?
i think you did the right thing staying home from work & having some time for yourself, its simply not fair that your little one is not here sharing those first milestones with you & perfectly normal to be emotional about it. better to have these days at home, than bottle them up and lash out at your sister for being insensitive next time she tells the relo's/friends she is waiting for you before having any more children! (although, in my opinion - that would be justified too!). sounds like a natural cycle is a good idea, but dont beat yourself up about not trying/arguing around 'o' time - you can only do so much.

i hope you are feeling a little better today & happy belated birthday - i hope next years is better for you.