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thread: LT TTC after Miscarriage or Loss #5

  1. #55
    Registered User

    May 2009
    SEQLD
    2,308

    Luna - It’s awful you’re still having to go through all that, I really hope it’s all sorted soon and you can try again with much much much more luck!

    Alice - Still hoping it’s just a late BFP!

    ferrals - What an F’ing cow! Seriously her and my eldest SIL would be the BESTEST freaking friends! Some people are so insensitive, I couldn’t believe the day I was told we would lose our baby her and MIL suggested to my face that I have my tubes tide! We had only just got back from the hospital. I have everything crossed you get to take your beautiful perfect little girl home with you. I’ve really had my faith in karma tested the last few years, seeing my all 3 of my SIL’s drink, smoke, go clubbing while pregnant and one even did drugs and yet they fall pregnant looking at any ol’ d!ck. It really isn’t fair.

    Clairesmummy - I hope you’re right and your BFP is on its way as well!

    AFM - I’m still a mess today, I stupidly logged on DH’s Facebook and looked at more pregnant photos of SIL, it’s tearing me apart, I know why she’s having the baby and it’s so wrong, she’s still smoking, still drinking, still hanging around the pub all weekend, still doesn’t look after the kids she has, throw her eldest daughter (15) for an absolute BS reason....it’s not fair! DH and I are bickering, we’re both super moody the last couple of days *sigh* I want to hide. Still zero symptoms and AF is two days away, knowing my luck it will be late, I always have the textbook 28 day cycle but over the last 12 months some have been an extra week for no reason! I just want our baby, I want our family finished! Mum is there this weekend then DH parents are here at the end of the month for a few days, it’s going to KILL me!

    Hope everyone else is good

  2. #56
    Platinum Member. 2010 RAK Recipient

    Jun 2009
    455

    OK ... I'll try again in the morning ...

  3. #57
    BellyBelly Member

    Apr 2010
    PROSTON QLD.
    604

    Alice- I have never had any luck with the pregnosis, FR seems to be more accurate than the pregnosis for me anyhow. Hoping it may just be a little early to get your BFP this cycle hun, I have everything crossed for you and praying you get your BFP in the next day or 2.
    Saffy- It would be a real sneaky BFP if I got one...lol....cause this month that's the last thing I am expecting. I really don't think I'm even in the running for a BFP this month at all. Not because of anything in particular just cause I really don't think I have O'd at all. My temps have been all over the place and no real sign on my chart that I have O'd at all this month. But I guess there's always a chance. lol.

  4. #58
    Platinum Subscriber

    Apr 2010
    coastside, Vic
    2,172

    Alice- hang in there babe

    Claresmummy- my temps were always all over the place, although thats probably no reassurance as i am still not pregnant either lol, FX anyway

  5. #59
    Platinum Member. 2010 RAK Recipient

    Jun 2009
    455

    ...thanks...sorry for the pity-fest, just feel really down

  6. #60
    Registered User
    Add Sunbeam on Facebook

    May 2009
    Gold Coast
    689

    Sorry for all ablout me post but I'm stunned!!! I just got a call from a real estate lady asking for a reference as my house mate has applied for a unit AN NOT EVEN TOLD ME!!!! How f@#king rude! I took her in 18 months ago when her 9 year relationship ended. I've allowed her to have her kids here when ever she wants, her family come and stay whenever for as long as they like, her girlfriend stays heaps and she gets a furnished room and her own bathroom all for very little rent and this is the thanks I get. I could not feel more taken for granted.
    I was in such a good space the last 2 days (even though I put my back out again) as I'd put up all these lovely positive affirmations and now I just feel completely flat.

    Sorry personals later my head is spinning right now.

  7. #61
    Registered User
    Add Sunbeam on Facebook

    May 2009
    Gold Coast
    689

    sorry double post.

  8. #62
    Registered User

    May 2009
    SEQLD
    2,308

    Thats very rude of her Sunbeam, I would be pee'ed to. I don't see why it's so hard for people to have common courtesy. Doesn't take much to say "hey, I've decided to move on and am looking for some where else to live".

  9. #63
    BellyBelly Member

    Apr 2010
    PROSTON QLD.
    604

    Sunbeam- I agree with TooManyShoes, that is so rude of your house mate to do something like that, I would be so cranky with her. How hard is it for some people to have a bit of common courtesy and say thank you but I have decided it's time to stand on my own 2 feet and could you please give me a ref. if I need one? How rude. I have been there before sunbeam so I know how you are feeling right now. Hence to say I have never had another room mate because of it.

  10. #64
    Registered User
    Add Sunbeam on Facebook

    May 2009
    Gold Coast
    689

    Alice - I am so hoping that the FMU will give you a different result. I usually get First Response from Woolies or Big W.

    Ferrals - SLO sounds truely horrible. I know it is right to test but I understand your reluctance to risk your bub. I am so sorry that your hidious SIL is just adding to this already unimaginably difficult situation.

    Crafty - Congratulations on becoming a nanna, such a shame you don't get baby cuddles. I hope mum and bub are doing well.

    Saffy - A nice weekend at a posh hotel sounds like a great escape.

    Clairesmummy - Your symptoms are sounding very positive bigger boobs is always a dead give away of a BFP for me, I'm thinking AF might be gone for a while

    Toomanyshoes - I'm sorry you are feeling so down. It is so hard not to get caught up in how unfair all this is and how scanky, druggy child abusers get babies they don't even want and we can't get our hearts desire.

    AFM - Sorry about earlier. Well I'm feeling better about it all now. I had planned to have a long talk to her tonight about all the things she has/hasn't been doing around the house that has been p@#sing me off. Since the new girlfriend came along 4 months ago she has become very selfish and inconsiderate so in a way she has done me a favour by going. At least now I get my house back to myself and it will be peaceful and clean.

  11. #65
    Registered User

    Mar 2010
    335

    Sunbeam: Stunned on your behalf. What a rude shock! Very odd she didn't tell you she was thinking of moving if she knew they'd ring you for a reference. Can understand why you'd feel let down.

    Alice: Pregnosis was how i found out i was pg with DD so i've superstitiously used it every since and had BFPs around date AF was due each time. (But the next two pgs did not end well so... guess it's not the test that's lucky). I'm so sorry there was no BFP yet. Hoping it's just too early and AF stays away but understand why you are feeling sad (though i can only imagine the depth of how you feel).

    Ferrals: I wish you didn't have to go through this but at least you have a clear recommendation from the geneticist to help you make the decision about whether to have the amnio. It sux big time that you couldn't have had an answer already from the cvs. I hope this test will finally give you peace and allow you to look forward to the rest of your pg.

    Toomanyshoes: Sorry you are having a hard time. Very hard to be around pg people when you so wanna be. Especially when it feels like the other person is so casual about it, doesn't take care of themselves and so doesn't seem to value it like you do. Have you had tests done to see if there are any reasons for the mc you have had?

    craftymummy: Congratulations on being a craftynanna! Well done! I hope you get cuddles really soon with little Jessica.

    Saffy: Enjoy the swish hotel and your BD fest!

    Luna: Sorry the ongoing BFP symptoms upset you.

    Clairesmummy: Said hello in the other thread i think but hi again. Hope you get a sneaky BFP or that AF hurries up and arrives so you can have your gynae appointment.

    India's mum: hi

    sorry for anyone i missed

    AFM: Getting crampy pains on and off. Could be symptoms that AF is coming (though i don't expect her for 10 days i have had this kind of thing happen before). Has also been a pg symptom for me... but if i 'O' last Wed or Thurs there's no chance i'm pg and if I 'o' Friday or Sat there's no chance i'd have symptoms yet! So i think it's probably just AF coming. BUt geez Louise, i hate these cycles where i'm either crampy cos i have AF, am 'o'ing or expecting AF (with almost no days off in between!) Feels kind of ridiculous.
    Last edited by possum magic; October 12th, 2010 at 09:36 PM. : forgot stuff

  12. #66
    Registered User

    Jan 2008
    PA
    125

    Smile

    Sunbeam - sounds like you'll be better off without her, but I agree, this was rude and cowardly.

    ferrals I cannot believe your SIL said this. How mean can she be?

    Alice - as Saffy said, 13 dpo and in the afternoon does not mean anything. Wait a couple of days and do it with FMU.

    Craftynana - congratulations! So is there any chance you get to hold her in the near future? How long do you have to wait for that?

    AFM - absolutely HATE health care system here in the US. I call with the problem, nobody will even see me, a nurse from the nurses line sends me for a BT. That happened last week as you know, only the repeat BT was inconclusive. I was stupid to go after 24 hours not 48, and at that time instead of dropping, it actually went up, from 192 to 256. Which probably means nothing, but you know, I am so desperate.... So the nurse told me to come in for another BT today, only she did not fax the script for it, so I showed up for nothing. The lady in the lab was like, "well, you can come back later after you talk to your doctor, but we are very busy today, blah blah blah". At this point I just melted down a bit, went and sat in my car and cried. Now I cannot do anything, all those scenarios are running through my head, like "what if it is a molar pregnancy", "what if it is ectopic", "what if it is all good". The last one would be pretty impossible, but I stopped bleeding, never had any big cramps or major bleed, so you see... Arggghhhhhh, I will go crazy here, I just want to KNOW, I cannot sleep, I cannot work, my stomach is all in knots, this is the worst possible stress I ever had.

  13. #67

    Apr 2009
    central coast
    2,298

    Looks like we are all having a rough time at the moment.

    Alice-i hope you see a line this morning.

    Sunbeam-was not very nice of your flatmate to not even give you a heads up.

    Luna-

    Possum magic-our bodies play game with us it is so annoying i hope your signs are not AF.

    AFM- i just feel so defeated i told hubby i want our girl to have a birth certificate and be recognised as a baby not a termination like Abbi was that still makes me uncomfortable reading her paper work and there is no record of her ever existing other than she is registered as being cremated for legal reasons i have looked at beautiful burial gowns for tiny preemy stillborns Abbi didnt get anything like that she had a blanket and a cardigan and beenie and booties that were to big for her so i am prepared for what might come i hope i am wrong what i would give to be wrong i just feel i have lost this battle too i am having a few days away with family so i wont post for a few days just not copeing very well

  14. #68
    BellyBelly Member

    Apr 2010
    PROSTON QLD.
    604

    Sunbeam- I'm glad you are thinking my symptoms sound good....lol....I'm just waiting for AF to arrive and thinking she is just playing games with me this month.....lol.....
    Possum- Hi again, I feel your apin with the cramping darl, my cycles are alot like that as was and it's all slowly but certainly driving me insane. This month I have tried to ignore everything and just see what happens.....but that's not working for me either as I'm still awaiting AF. LOL. Ah well you win some you lose some hey.....Hope you get your BFP darl, I have my FX for you.
    Luna- I hope you get some answers soon darl, it's as stressful as hell not knowing what is going on. Hang in there darl we are all here for you. FX you get some good results.
    Ferrals- I so wish I could jump through my computer and give you a huge big hug, my heart is really going out to you right now darl, I just want everything to be so great for you. I can't offer any advice darl, sorry, but I just want you to know we are all here for you and I have everything crossed that your beautiful little girl you are growing is just as beautiful as her mum and healthy darl. I'm praying for you and your bub everyday.
    AFM- Still no show from AF as yet anyhow, CD27 for me and have always had AF by now apart from 1 cycle where I actually had a 28 day cycle but they are usually 26days for me. Don't even have any sign of her turning up as yet not a spot nudder not a thing. This is sooooo frustrating, I bet if I didn't want her here she would hit me like a freight train......lol.....have a great day ladies I'm off to town for the day after I drop DD off at Kindy. And yes I think I will buy some of those FR POAS unless AF arrives before I get there.......
    xoxox

  15. #69
    Registered User
    Add Sunbeam on Facebook

    May 2009
    Gold Coast
    689

    Luna - I'm so sorry it is being so frustrating getting answers but if your HCG has gone up you obviously have not m/c. Some women's HCG does fluctuate to start with but I guess it should be higher than it is. I hope they test you again with good results and that you find someone more helpful this time round.

    Ferrals - I hope you are able to have some peace in your time away with your family. Please don't feel you are not coping well, there is no good way to cope with this it is impossibly hard, you are being fantastically brave.

    Possum Magic - I'm sorry your body is playing games with you. We get so tuned into that part of our body through all this that it becomes impossible to decipher what is AF and what is pg and what is just all in our heads!

    Alice - Didi you test again?

  16. #70
    Platinum Member. 2010 RAK Recipient

    Jun 2009
    455

    Ferrals, like Sunbeam said, there's no good way to cope with this, you are doing so well and being so strong, hang in there. I hope the time away helps. Sending you lots of love and hope xxoo

    Sunbeam, I'm so gobsmacked at your flatmate doing that - even if she meant to tell you then they rang for a reference before she'd had a chance she should have given you more notice and just had the decency to let you know, it's your home after all there's just no explaining some types of behaviour and really, she's an adult isn't she? That's the sort of thing you'd expect in your 20s in share houses. Well at least you'll have the place to yourself for a while and that's always nice. When is your cruise?? No I didn't test again today, just not up to it.

    Luna, I'm not surprised you just curled up in your car and cried it's so bloody tough without all of that. I have no idea what's happening with you either, I've never been through that it must be so confusing and upsetting. I hope you can get some answers soon.

    Possums, Clairesmummy - you both sound like you are up in the air with your cycles too. What is going on with us all? All these possible pg symptoms vs AF symptoms vs O symptoms??? sigh...so frustrating!!!! Hope AF either shows her ugly face or doesn't show SOON so you can get on with being happy to be pg or ready to start a new cycle.

    Toomanyshoes, you too!! Aggrr with all this waiting!!

    Saffy, thanks for yesterday, I was a mess xx

    I just didn't have it in me to test again today, plus I'd been up twice during the night to pee anyway so wasn't even sure if I would have strong enough FMU for it to read properly. I am trying to get on top of this overwhelming sadness - have been for a long walk, had a good breakfast, cleaned up around the house and done three loads of washing. Been thinking that my expectations were always going to be a lot higher this cycle after falling pg last time for the first time plus the diet and acupuncture that I've been doing weekly and herbs every day. It's been my sole focus all this time and now all I can do is wait and it is doing my head in like never before. My bbs are still bigger and sore so go figure. I think I will just wait it out to the bt but feel in my heart that it will be a negative. Had a big bawl on the phone to my Mum yesterday which I always regret because she just worries about me and thinks it is all too much for me to go through and I should stop doing this to myself because it is too upsetting. Maybe she is right, I don't know. I feel like I have had more melt-downs this cycle than last time, I guess I had come to terms with it all being over last time and the pg was such a shock I never thought it could happen. Now I know it can, I want it more than ever. Thanks for putting up with me, I can't tell you how much it means to me

    Ah well just went to the loo and the bleeding has started so AF is here
    Last edited by Alice; October 13th, 2010 at 12:32 PM. : AF arrived

  17. #71
    Registered User

    Sep 2009
    866

    alice-i'm sorry bleeding has started,life can be so cruel,i think we're all keeping the tissue factories in business at the moment...when is bt due?..thinking of you,sending you lots of hugs.I'm sorry i can't make this better for you

  18. #72
    Registered User

    Sep 2009
    WA
    508

    Hi everyone

    Ferrals don't give up on your girl yet ! wait until you get the amnio re****s then you can have a party as I know it will be 100% perfect NO SLO you jsut wait and see !!!

    Alice so sorry honey is it just spotting or full blown AF ? I am so with you and how you have been feeling the last few days that was me last week and you all got me through it and I am here to help you !!!

    Sunbeam sorry about your housemate ungreatful Bi#ch you will be better off on your own anyway in a clean house !!! hope you cruise is just awsome and you come back full of fight ready for the next leg in your travels towards a BFP !!!

    saffy hope your pills are near the end now !! matthews mum where are you at are you haveing anymore trans or do you wait for another egg pick ??

    Possum and luna thanks for your well wishes,

    AFM well major meltdown feeling really homesick and wondering how to cope with not seeing my family and new grand baby but they are so far away and skype and email is about all I am gonna get !!

    My eyes are so sore from crying and crying and I feel so mixed up about emigrating here and the mc and well everything I guess the move in AUG was a bit too much too.
    I do have some clomid coming though and pre seed too so wonder if I am in the right frame of mind to give it a go this month from day 5 to 9 or just wait it out and sort out my emotions first !!! ( don't think they will ever be sorted until I get a BFP )

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