Maruschke: i have seen a heartbeat for 2 of my pregnancies that i went on to miscarry at 9 weeks, so i guess merely by definition they were miscarriages and the others CP
thanks ladies,i needed you & once again you were there,thanks...minniemouse-go with how you feel about them,we love our babies from the very start,even before their conceived so much love & hope goes into planning for them.i felt a lot of guilt(as usual) for dealing with my cp different to the loss of matthew,but as a friend said to me we try to gaurd our hearts sometimes but i do think of my cp as a very early loss,when i think of that baby i always think girl,medical terminology can seem so harsh at times
I think maybe the difference to me is a CP results in a somewhat normal AF following a positive HPT, whereas a MC results in long/heavy AF anything from a week after it's due.
I never knew I was PG because I had light AF (as usual) and never tested. It wasn't until a week after AF had finished that I started getting definite symptoms and decided to test and got a very dark BFP straight away. I had a scan 3 days later and there was no sac and a week after that I started to bleed. My BT results were 600-700 so I'm thinking I was about 5-6 weeks.
But I do agree that there is every right to mourn when BFP has been detected, no matter how long it stays.
That's just how I define it with me I had 2 m/c because to me getting repeated positive BT and a scans showing sack fetal pole etc ended in m/c. My cp was a positive test when AF was due and then 2 days later it went away and AF started.
I think the medical definition is very different.
I'm just sneaking in here after some lurking. I find this debate interesting too. Almost all my m/c's have been after scans showing HBs so really hit me hard as "true" m/c's.
This year we had what I would consider a CP - low positive BT after AF had already arrived (early). In my head I didn't really consider that one a pregnancy as I had already thought I wasn't when AF arrived. Probably also made it easier to deal with it emotionally. My latest loss was probably terchnically a CP as was only based on positive BT and later dropping of HCG levels followed by AF at 5.5 weeks. That one didn't hit me as hard as some previous losses but still felt like a m/c because I already had hopes and dreams built up for that potential baby. Didn't help that the IVF clinic sends all that pg info out straightaway too. Next time I'm going to ak them to wait until we are sure things are progressing in the right direction.
I think once you have a definite BFP then you are emotionally attached already. NO matter how hard you try, its impossible not to build up a whole future for the potential child in your body - even if they are only there briefly.
All my love and best wishes go out to all you lovely ladies who have been and still are going through suffering that no one should have to. We all deserve that one small wish - a healthy live baby in our arms. Something that is Sooooooo simple for the majority of the population ( a lot of whom are trying hard for it NOT to happen!).
Saffy - I'm sorry it was a BFN babe. What's the next step for you?
Mathew'smum - I hope you were able to have a peaceful and reflective day remembering tiny Mathew, big hugs
Joeve - Best of luck with the BDing . You must be leading the charge for the next TWWers.
Minnie - I had not heard the term chem pg until a year or so ago. My 3rd was a chem pg (got my positive bt on new years eve and 4 days later I just knew it was gone so I had them do another bt and I was right). All 4 others got to 7 weeks or more and required me to be hospitalised for pain and/or D&C, then 2 more chem pg this year. Seems really sad when I write it out like that, 7 babies that never got to be. Its is kind of odd to think that women not desperately TTC have chem pgs all the time and have on idea and never have to mourn the loss, ignorance is bliss I guess.
thanks girls for your thoughts, with the true CP 2 weeks ago i guess im wondering where it fits into things.
sunbeam: it is depressing when you write it down isn't it, you and i both got close on our last tries, hopefully we all get the sticky bfp next time, how good would it be too all be out of this thread and into the pregnancy thread for the new year ! you are right there are probably lots of women who don't even realise they have had a CP, the progesterone is a necessary evil for me because i have to test to know whether to stop them (as i know many of you do) i would sooner not test and wait to see if af arrived or not
Meredith: to you are you planning on staying in here with us ? what is next for you ? an IVF cycle by the looks of your signature
matthewsmum: more for you
afm: i think im going to ovulate soonish, of course DH has developed a fever and is getting sick (we have all had it, im on antibiotics for a sinus infection), we better all improve before i get that positive opt ! my stupid prolactin is ridiculously low again, the lowest its ever been so more fiddling with my medication, i asked the dr if i have to be on medication even when im not ttc (ie the rest of my life), does it matter that i have high prolactin ? she said yes you can't have high prolactin but i really don't even know what the big deal is, i never feel any different from it being really low or really high ! so annoying
hey girls, im jumping the gun with my bfn, BT isn't until monday but getting daily bfn's with FRER everyday so not imagining things will change as I'm 14dpo now.
I wrote a long screed on chemical pregs v m/c but of course my computer lost it all, am visited by the PMT fairy today so VERY grumpy, watch out DH lol!
Hope everyone is having a good weekend and not getting wet like we are in VIC!
mini I have high prolactin when not on my meds... and I don't feel at all different then either. The only thing that bugged me was that I just wouldn't stop lactating. My GP is quite keen for me to only take the meds when TTC. I hope DH recovers quick enough for BD
Mini hope DH is better for o time!
Hello everyone I am writing this cycle off as we just have not had the opportunity to bd very much and it feels like o has been and gone early for me this month.
Ugh I feel like crap. Christmas is coming. We conceived last Christmas (O'd Christmas Day) and miscarried. All the women I was pg with at that time have given birth. Most of the women who also miscarried at that time have conceived again, some have given birth, most are in their 3rd tri. All I got was another miscarriage and a hole in my bank account. People who started TTC when I started TTC have given birth and started TTC again. FML.
Not doing very well at the moment are we? Think we all need
Saffy - I'm so sorry it looks like a BFN for you babe.
Joeve - Sorry you did not get much time to bd but it only takes one little swimmer to get the job done.
Minnie - I hope DH gets well quick enough to DTD in time.
Maruschke - I know what you mean, the people I was originally posting with are mostly onto their second bub by now. My friend who I was pg with (when I had my second mc) her daughter turns 2 next month (we were due a week apart). Its all pretty depressing.
AFM - I'm getting really worried this is my 4th or 5th month now with a really non existent AF. I mean no red blood at all, almost no lining clots and its almost over in 24 hours. That just can't be right. I am going to see if I can see FS and if he just blows me off with "things change with age" then I'm getting a new FS.
Joeve: i hope you are still in with a chance this cycle, you might have got lucky with the timing. can you imagine how great it is to have a known day you will ovulate on !! people with "normal" cycles don't know how lucky they are !
Maruschke: for you. it suxs it has to be like this for us, it has just been 2 years since my first miscarriage and where have i gotten in that time....another 3 losses and a lot of stress, pain and worry ! its not fair
how are you feeling physically after the EPU ? have you heard how things are going ?
saffy: i read on anther thread af arrived for you
sunbeam: are you going straight into another cycle ?
afm: my ovaries and sore and im getting fertile signs, we got a dtd "in the bank" last night just in case the opt is positive today or tomorrow, its all so romantic....not !
sunbeam: we must have been posting at the same time, yes that doesn't sound right at all, especially when you are on progesterone, can you get an ultrasound to see how thick your lining is at ovulation (or a bit later in the cycle) ?
Maruschke : i forgot to ask you what your fs says about taking the dostinex, are you meant to come off it in pregnancy ?
with me I had 2 m/c because to me getting repeated positive BT and a scans showing sack fetal pole etc ended in m/c. My cp was a positive test when AF was due and then 2 days later it went away and AF started.
. You must be leading the charge for the next TWWers.
to you are you planning on staying in here with us ? what is next for you ? an IVF cycle by the looks of your signature
hope you get some nice news this Christmas x
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