Leis - it's okay to feel down, truly. Sorry, I hope you didn't think I was trying to jolly you along or anything because I think after everything you go through in long term TTC, you've got every right to feel down from time to time. I'd be the last person to tell someone to cheer up because I would often hit the skids with monotonous regularity. Also after my experience with peesticks, I'm very wary of them too and I know how they can ruin your day.

Thanks for asking about Apple (the bump). He/she is due on April 4. It's a shock I'm still getting over I think!