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Thread: LT TTC Two Week Wait #4

  1. #217

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    hey ladies, i did a POAS this morning 7DPT and it was a BFN!! DH said maybe its too early but both other times it picked up 6DPT so i doubt it. Im shattered and really wondering why we just wasted the past 4 months planning and waiting and then doing the long process for the STIM to get 20 eggs, 1 embryo and still no baby. Im over it and cant believe the bad luck DH and i have had this year. The worst part is i think we always prepare ourselves for a neg cause thats all we know but this time i thought it was it, i felt different i had barely any pains this time and i thought it was gods way of saying you dont need those other 19 embryos you only need this one, well that was a load of crock and instead this is going to be the s******* christmas ever. Im sorry ladies but i cant believe we are now looking at doing a 3rd EPU and a 6th transfer! I hope you ladies get your BFP's, all the best xxxxxx


  2. #218

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    sweetie and oneday dont give up yet. One day when is your bt?

  3. #219

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    Hey oneday86, I'm prob not a good role model for you! It's tough but we have to remember our turn will come... I know it's hard to stay positive, though what helps for me is speaking to friends, hearing others stories, gives me hope. My boss had first baby at 22, then struggled for six years for her second and had a couple of miscarriages in between. I really wanted to have a baby in my 20's with my first boyfriend, we were together for 9 years. Found out he was cheating on me big time, so I went overseas... The positive, I met my future husband in Ireland and everyday I'm so happy for that. Of course I want to have his baby but oh well... We'll get there matie!

  4. #220

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    Girls - it's not over yet! Oneday - weren't your last transfers day 5 and this one was day 3 (can't remember) if so, maybe this one will take a few more days to show up??? I know how awful it is getting hopes up for nothing, but I don't want you to lose hope just yet. Also, embryoes implant at different times after transfer (I read somewhere between 1 and 4 days) then a few days later hcg will show up on a test, so if it took a bit longer to implant then it might take a bit longer to show up on a test. I am crossing everything so tightly for you both

  5. #221

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    Thanks Trishy and Kaybee. Well I just did POAS a few mins ago and BFN... So maybe still early (6DPT)... I had the frozen embryo transfer (5 day old embyie), if that make's any diff. Babydust for everyone!!!! x

  6. #222

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    Thanks sweetie! i too believe this too but everytime i try and it fails its like a bit more of my hope and heart breaks away, i just feel like its never going to happen for DH and I and i truly couldn't do this for another 4 yrs or more, we talked this morning about it and i think we are going to do one more STIM cycle and thats it. IVF has changed my whole life as it has everyone elses, but i believe it has changed me for the worst, im stressed and moody all the time i dont even know how to have fun anymore, my DH and i fight all the time i just cant physically and emotionally do it anymore! Having a baby of my own is everythng to me so for this i pull my self through the hard times and hold onto that hope but this one had seriously taken its toll on me, im so frustrated with life and its sh** hurdles it keeps putting us through. Iv decided enough is enough with my job (im a childcare worker) i cant do it anymore, there is 5 women pg there and obviously its just hard enough working with kids everyday, the prob is where do i go from here? iv got no other qualifications but i guess i will find something. Sorry for a me post AGAIN. I really do hope you ladies get BFP's xxxxxxxxx

    Trishy im with westmead they only do urine tests then if your pg you go in for a BT, they wanted me to do them on the 23rd and 25th of dec xx

  7. #223

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    Hey oneday86 never to late for a career change. But you'll never escape from other pg women. I used to be so jealous when heard the baby news of friends and family back in Ireland, then girls around me... But then I thought I would never want them to feel the way I do or experience this pain of LT TTC. I know of five girls pregnant at work too! Two of them have had miscarriages in the past, and one having twins! I'm so excited for them all!

    Well, you don't have to tell me about the fights with DH, we have had our fair share! These days we spend time more with the reno's for our house (have a leaking roof/ceiling, not fun!) so trying to relax think of other things... Oh I would love a glass of wine today, but I'll wait it out...

  8. #224

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    Thanks ladies for your support. Kaybee this was a day 5 like my other 4, your right it may have implanted later so i will do another test in a few days but im not very confident about it. I do need a change of career, for now anyway, I know i will never escape pg people but with my job i work very closely to everyone (outside in the playground, in the room etc) and it is very hard hearing them talking about being pg all the time, im very happy for all of them but it just dosn't make it easy when trying to concieve especially when they winge about it. I hope your results are wrong too sweetie, fingers crossed xxxx

  9. #225

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    Whoa Woo Kaybee: Congrats hoping with all my heart this is your sticky bub

    Oneday: Don't beat yourself up too much, I always thought I was pretty tough mentally, until IVF came into my life. 2010 has been a roller coaster ride thats for sure. I keep thinking I should be having a bub in Jan, and think back to when we found out the bub had past, all I kept saying was that I felt broken...and I still feel broken. Then fast forward now almost 6mths and I'm still broken, if not more so. IVF is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do in my life, there are pregnancies and babies everywhere...All I can say is please pick yourself up and do what you need to do to give the little soul waiting for your love and nuturing that they need...There are so many ways to give a mothers love.

    Tantee: Thanks so much for the pep talk the other day, I think I needed...good luck testing today, I don't know how you've waited this long

    Saffy:Good luck going ala natural...I don't remember how that happens LOL, you mean with out drugs and Scientist..So hoping for a Christmas Miracle for you..got busy this week will catch up next week if your around

    Aimee: You must've bought the same tests as me LMAO, I have one a day too..

    Tima Sweetie and anyone else I've missed hope your travelling well...

    AFM: POAS this morning bfn..I'm 8dp2dt I think thats right...have my bt on Friday the 17th if I dont go to the nut house before then...
    On a positive note we have had offers on our place, so our sea change (or inland change) could be happening early in the new year..maybe thats what I need ...to start putting myself back together, and not be so broken...Sticky vibes to everyone...

  10. #226

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    Mar 2008
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    hello...I am coming in to join you all....just had a blastocyst transferred today, so the long wait begins.

    I am sorry to those who have just had negative results.... Springlola- perhaps too early to tell yet.... and sorry sweeetie and oneday...it's such a hard road, and full of so many ups and downs, and the downs can really knock you hard, i can relate. Hang in there.... our turns will come.

  11. #227

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    Oct 2008
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    Springlola - I really hope that it swings the other way for you, you are still only 10dpo technically, so very early. Great news re your house. Hopefuly that will get you closer to where you want to be.

    Oneday - I'm sorry that your test was neg, but believe me, I have googled and googled and googled today and there are plenty of people who have had very low numbers at this stage. I can relate to feeling like a little piece of you chips off with every bfn. Hang in there lovely, it can still change.
    Are you able to do any part time or online courses to help with a change of job or perhaps your current work can train you up on admin side of thing in their office to get some experience and then move on? It's a big decision. I'm 36 and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up.

    Sweetie - Yes, you are still borderline early. I really hope that you get your bfp. We are doing renos also, although am only up to the planning stage and having things have ripped out stage - feels like the story of my life!

    Possums - hope your 2ww passes quickly for you.

    Trishy - GL for your 2ww, what day transfer did you have?

    Saffy - I hope you've had a relaxing weekend and that you are feeling a little better now.

    Hi Tima, Aimee, hope you are both OK and that you are both out enjoying your weekends.

    AFM - Well I have a confession to make. I caved in yesterday afternoon (6dp5dt) and POAS. It came up with the lightest of lightest lines, HOWEVER.. this morning with fmu...nothing! OK, so, obsessively (because I had one left) I did another this afternoon and it also had a very light line but I have started to spot. So I think something tried to happen, but didn't really take. Also feeling slight AF pain and still no bb tenderness or nausea (these were around at 10dpo last time)
    IKWYM about a crappy Christmas. I am dreading it. There are only a few of us at Christmas including my pregnant SIL, who was a month behind me. It is going to be a tough reminder at Christmas. I just want to go away for Christmas but it is impossible.
    I do not begrudge anyone a child but have to admit that I am a little jealous of how effortless it is for some and just find it hard to deal with at the moment.

    My Inlaws dropped in this morning about an hour after my test, MIL asked me if everything was OK, I said no, the cycle didn't work and and in the next breath she proceeded to start telling me of some random person she knows who is having a baby next week, no 'oh I'm sorry, or that's no good' I interrupted her to say, look, I don't want to hear about all this right now if you don't mind' and walked out of the room. After last time when I lost my pregnancy, same thing happened and she seemed to think it was the perfect time to tell me that my SIL was pregnant.
    Sorry for the me rant, but I had to let it out. I will not be telling anyone about any future TTC cycles again and am so thankful that I have you lovely ladies and others out there to talk to about this. (So much hugging in this post - you can tell I am feeling very emotional today!!)
    Last edited by tantee; December 13th, 2010 at 01:40 AM.

  12. #228

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    Oh tantee- I am so sorry you have such an insensitive MIL! Mine is not great either, and my SIL has also shared pregnancy news at bad times..it's not fair
    as for your tests/spotting....don't count yourself out yet, spotting can happen in pregnancy, so you never know- and symptoms can vary each time (been my experience)....I hope that perhaps you will get a pleasant surprise. It's such a rollercoaster though, I understand that. hang in there. this is a hard thing for us all to be going through right ahead of christmas too.

  13. #229

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    Hi All

    SpringLola: do you think we should wait till our BT's for positive results?! DH got mad at me today for POAS, he said too early (though he no expert!). I used a digital stick, which your supposed to use on the first day of missed period. Not going to test again until Thursday... Let's see how long I can hold out for. Crossing fingers for you too!

    Possums: yes we'll all hang in there together!! This is for you too oneday86 and well everyone here!

    Tantee: Families, grrr! Mine were great to me, but DH said nobody on my side asked how he was (when we had miscarriage)... I never thought about it that way.

    S

  14. #230

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    Hi all,

    Im still lurking around and silently reading your posts. I'm having a bad feeling about this month, especially after accidentely poas this afternoon. :| It of course was a bfn! Looks like everyones vibes are going downhill. Have also been cramping on and off today and im horrified! Ah well.

    Sweetie and aimee, looks like our BT's are on the same day! FX af doesnt come!

    Just made some nachos and im eating like a pig!

  15. #231

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    nsw
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    Hi ladies! All i can say is huge s, i cant believe what a bad year it has been for alot of us in here on BB!
    Dh took me chrissie shopping today which cheered me up a bit and a tiny bit of me is still hoping i just tested too early this time but im pretty certain it is a BPN. We were eating in the food court at the shops today and we had this young couple with a girl around 3 and a brand new baby boy sitting behind us and the whole time the guy was swearing at the mother and carraying on, when i finished my lunch i got up and said we need to go to my DH as tears were welling up in my eyes, it frustrates me and makes me so angry that certain ppl dont realise how lucky they are to have a beautiful miracle in their lives, i have become so sensitive on this topic since doing IVF because i know there are so many ppl out there that deserve children and cant have them.

    Ladies i too can relate to hurting after a loss, i always think about my 'baby' and that he/she was due on the 3rd of march, it breaks my heart everytime i think about it and i will tell you there isnt a day that goes by that i dont think about that baby. I wish i knew why we had to go through so much heartache but i dont and it isn't fair but good things do come to good ppl and we will get our turns. i truly am so thankful for this site and you wonderful ladies becasue i would be lost without you xxxxxxx

    I too am thinking about keeping the next STIM cycle to our selves, it makes it so much harder having to tell everyone it didnt work AGAIN! and to be honest i believe our family and friends are giving up hope on us having a baby. My mother inlaw can be pretty insensitive of our feelings too, when i lost our baby she rang the next day and told us good family friends were pg, i just thought why tell us? we dont need to know right now but my DH told her it upset me which was good. I think it comes down to ppl not knowing what we go through and carry everyday so they dont think these things would hurt us?

    Ladies i hope we all get miracles and our BFN's turn into BFP's xxxx

  16. #232

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    Possums, just dropping to wish you all the very best, will be saying my prayers for you xx
    Good luck to everyone else!

  17. #233

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    hey ladies just wanted to drop into say iv started to spot! I still had a little bit of hope the test was wrong but now it has hit home xxxx

  18. #234

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    to you oneday- you will get the miracle you deserve, I just don't know why we all have to wait so long for it xxx

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