LTTTC after Miscarriage and Loss

Hi ladies,

Crafty - so glad you are going ahead with your appt, nothing ventured nothing gained.

Ferrals - I know what you mean about feeling like we've been in TTC threads for ever. I know I left a few times briefly but....still here I am! It must be our turn soon. Hope your TTW does not drag on too much. I realised we have about 12 hours a month where we are not just waiting around. We wait 2 weeks to O then 2 weeks to test. We have that awesome 12 hour break where we know we O'ed and can actually be doing something other than waiting. We must be the most patient people on the planet!

AFM - well I have no idea what's going on. My boobs have been sore but I'm sure that's just the progesterone. Today I am 5dpo and I'm soooo tired and totally grumpy, I just want to be in bed, everything is too much effort today. I hope its a good sign but probably way too early.

Hi Ladies

Ferrals - I hear you about the $$$. I can't imagine how we will afford IVF. DH said not to worry we have things we can sell and MIL has money put aside for us for IVF plus DH Grandma. But I just don't feel right in asking if and when we need the extra.

Sunbeam Maybe have an early night. It's been an emotional couple of weeks for you. I'm hoping the sore (.Y.) are a great sign FX.

Crafty I agree with Sunbeam. You have nothing to lose by going to your FS appointment. FX you just need a little help.

I know I've missed some one. I struggle to keep up some days. I hope you are all travelling well.

ferrals-clinic was saying you can sometimes claim some of ivf expenses through tax system,worth looking into if you haven't already...craftymummy-hope you've kept your baby stuff...happybaby-keeping busy in your tww?..alice-your so sweet,thank you,i'll ask about the scan...trea-wishing you lots of luck for tomorrow. ..afm-i think i've o'd,waiting for bt result to show that as well,hopefully i'll get a transfer date when i ring tomorrow for results...hugs to all

Mathewsmum-Yeh! i am going to an accountant next month with all my PGD ivf receipts from last year as i was OOP about $6000 i have already claimed some money back for the $900 we paid for the orgalutran on private health insurance i don't no why it was so expensive when this time we will get 5 injections for $350 and any extra is about $60 so much cheaper through westmead ivf.
I am also claiming back 2 laptops and i under estimated our income by about $10,000-$15,000 with centerlink since DH changed jobs so i think we will get a nice top up payment from them on top of the carers bonus i get for my boys in july i am crossing my fingers for around $6000 which will go straight into my poor looking savings account.

Sunbeam-i am feeling different this month i don't even really worry about all the symptoms or lack of i am just waiting for my AF so i can ring the clinic to see if i made it on the list i am not even thinking of if i could be pregnant just expect not to be and you know what i feel good not caring about it every second of every day i am not even counting days to test i am not going to test this month unless i am late i am just waiting for AF to start ivf but we will see how am am at the end of the TWW.

AFM- FS rang with my BT results i am perfectly normal in every way all hormones were great my thyroid function spot on normal she said very normal BT results.
And my U/S she is very happy with and this next cycle they are leaving me on 200 puregon as i make to many follicles which pushes my E2 levels up so she wants me to stay on a low dose and aim for 10 eggs which i am a little bummed about i have the potential for 20+ eggs but because of my stupid E2 levels going to high i have to aim for less

ferrals-they say it's the quality,not the quanity,10 still a good number,women have had less and ended up with a baby...afm-clinic rang early this morning,needed another bt as my estrogen is still lower than 500,showing other signs of o'ing though,got the cm happening,felt 'o' pain in my side this morning.

Ferrals 10 good mature eggs would be fantastic (and would be praying they all or mostly fertilize and continue to grow, grow, grow). The more eggs you get the higher the chance some are immature is that right? But then I can see your point. If its a numbers game you want more hey?

Crafty hope you caught the egg this month and don't need that FS appointment.

AF arrived yesterday a day late. 27days to go till my appointment and hopefully I can start the pill then in readiness for IVF.

Hi all

Matthews mum great news your transfer won't be long now they just need to get your hormones right !
Ferrals 10 eggs is a great number and I agree with Mildez better to have good quality and less of them I think ! ( 10 is a great number )

Mildez sorry Af turned up I guess you were getting your hopes up being a day late I would be anyway ! not long now and you can get sorted on a good IVF plan and work towards your goal, Be nice if we get to be UTD together with ferrals and the rest of us in here !

Ferrals I agree with not thinking about the TWW too much me too, I figure why would this month be any different from the last 9mnths ! anyway got to write out my history ready for next weeks apt, not enough space on the form they sent me only has room for 4 pregnancies well I have 14 all up so need a full A4 sheet Lol,
Really nervous in a way as to what they gonna say when they see my age and how many kids I already have but I remind myself I am paying for the apt and they better be nice to me ! I may just have a hissy fit if they make any rude comments I am peri-menapause as you know and my moods swing let me tell you one minute cry cry cry the next I want to kill kill kill god how I hate being me atm,
Poor DH cops it most the time I am very patient with my kids but DH well seems he can't do anything right of late !!! Shame I will have to make it up to him real soon !

Enjoy your day !

Crafty - they better be nice to you! Shouldn't matter how many babies/pregnancies you've had - if you need treatment then that is what they are there for. BTW, my brother rang the other night and was sounding v. excited but I lost my courage to ask so changed the topic but sounds like their IVF is going well. Feel bad, but I so don't want to know, just cannot face it ATM.

Ferrals I can understand you wanting to get as many as you can, especially with the genetic issues, but hopefully they'll all be great quality so if anything does arise, you'll have lots of blasties to draw on. Still in the TWW though, so maybe you won't need it after all..

Mildez, bring on that appointment! Not long to go now

MatthewsMum - somewhere along this journey a doc/practitioner said to me "you can't rush the flow of a river" - would be nice if we could though, wouldn't it? Hope your levels pick up and the transfer happens soon.

Porsche, hope the spotting has stopped (that would drive me nuts too!). Only a week until your appointment now

Sunbeam - hope you're feeling better today. Are you on progesterone support?

Sevie - how are you travelling?

Trea, Hubba_Bubba - how are you both?

MurryCod - can't wait to hear about your scan. Hang in there, your levels sound great

Sorry to miss anyone x

AFM, meh, my chart is not looking great and I need my chart to improve so we can start IVF :( She is adamant that until I can keep high temps after 'o'ing that I won't be able to carry a baby full term. I was doing well, but today (day 22) it is down to 36.3. Feel bummed out but it's been a busy week, I feel tired like I might be coming down with a cold, and I have fallen off the diet wagon several times so feel guilty. Going to have an early night tonight so hopefully that will help. It's FREEZING up here so happy to get into bed!

X

Hi Alice

My spotting stopped yesterday would you beleive it? I had to change our appointment to the day we see the Dr. We were having nurse co ordinator appointment on the 18th and the Dr appointment on the 22nd but Dh had some important football final or some such nonsense so I had to change it. I was lucky they had a spot on the 22nd at 1pm and the Dr appointment at 2:30pm. That's handy that way we only make 1 trip and only have 1 lot of parking to pay.

I just found out a friend killed herself her 5yr old son now has no parents i don't understand how anyone can do that to their child :cry:

mildez-good luck with your last cycle before ivf...craftymummy-have fun making up..alice-hope you can nip the flu in the bud,don't feel guilty about your diet,got to let loose sometimes..porshe-good timing for you,i had trouble working initial app's around dh work..ferrals-that's sad,does he have extended family to help him through this

Oh Ferrals :( :( that's awful...and the poor kid...ah so sad

ferrals - that is so terrible for the lil boy...sending heaps of hugs your way!! xoxox

Ferrals huge ((hugs)) I wonder if we know the same person. I too found out yesterday a lady I knew died (she has 2 boys although one not in her care and a bubba that passed away shortly after birth) I too am devastated and can't help but think if the system didn't fail her (that lead to the death of her baby) if this would not have happened. It really is heartbreaking to think of the children who are left without parents when it could be avoided.

Hi Girls,
It is really sad this poor girl has had such a hard life her mum died when she was 3 giving birth to her baby brother so her father had to raise her and her older brother and a newborn by himself he remarried a little later and was very close to her step mum i worked with her for while before she had to leave to help care for the family her stepmum has been fighting cancer for years and her dad broke his leg badly so has been unable to work.
I guess the pressure was to much for her with her own son to look after as well the poor little fella he will stay with his grandfather there is no one else the grandfather is not old about 45 so he should be ok.
It is such a terrible thing i look at my boys and i could never leave them.

Very sad news on here I too could never think of leaving my kids its so sad when some feel the only way out is to commit suicide, My uncle did it when he was only 43 and left his new grandson of only 4mnths old at the time, my cousin (his son ) never got over it and ended up killing himself driving his sports car too fast and full of alcohol at the age of 38 so sad, he left a 14yr old and a 12 yr old at the time so left his kids feeling like he had felt after his dad did himself in sometimes it goes on for a few generations !
Mildez sorry you know someone too how sad this world is at times !!!

4 days to go till my apt not sure how I feel about it now its nearly here, had a text to confirm I was going sat morning so had my chance to cancel and didn't !

Alice I hope you can find the strength to listen to your brother and his story sometime it may help you in the end ! I struggle everytime I speak to my son in the UK they are now 24wks pregnant and its so hard but for them I have to make the effort and hopefully they will do the same for me on of these days, don't feel bad about your diet I am the worlds worst ! for bad eating habbits ( fish and chips by the beach a few hours ago ! ) not really good when I need to loosed at least 15KG !!!!
We can't be perfect we need some nice treats in life !

Thanks Crafty, I just can't face it yet but I know what you are saying. In the past I've found it hard to face the pregnancies but usually OK once the bub comes so it's good they don't live close. Actually with the people in my life who are actually sensitive and aware of our situation, the pregnancies aren't hard either. My brother is not one of those people. Just a bit sick of the circus of family events that revolve around him and his kids. I love them all dearly but would be nice to share the light with my other brother and I some times. I know he'd be thrilled for us if it happened and I don't want them to be grieving and sad but honestly my SIL says she doesn't really want another one so if she gets another one I will feel like punching something out of pure frustration! You know...like a tree or something :/

Oh and thanks for your encouragement re the diet. I'm being 99.999% good with it but tonight there is a chocolate frog in the drawer that is calling my name and I'm not sure I can resist much longer! Agghhhh !!!

Good luck with your appointment! I had my heart in my mouth when I logged on just now and saw your name in the post - honestly Crafty, this BFP that is in my mind for you just won't go away and I can't explain it - so hope I am right!!

And for all of us waiting in here, I am hoping so damn hard we get the break we all so desperately want very very soon. We deserve it after all this hardship!!

Sunbeam, when are you testing? How are you going with the TWW?

Ferrals, have you found a place yet? How'd the court case go (or is it coming up?). Hoping you'll get a surprise this month

Mildez, that's awful that you also know someone who has suicided. The pain of it never goes away, poor poor kids.

Porsche, Sevie, MatthewsMum - you're in my thoughts. Hope all is well with you.

Love and hugs to everyone and sorry for anyone I have missed (including the lurkers!!)

Hi Ladies

I've been reading your posts just haven't been in the mood to reply. I'm on another forum as well and it's really doing my head in. I really can't cope at the moment. All these BFP and I'm still yet to O. Getting a bit down in the dumps about it. Haven't had a + OPK and I'm now CD24. I'm really frustrated not only because we want to get UTD but because it will delay Af and then delay IVF. I can't understand why I haven't O'd I took clomid and well it seems to me like it hasn't worked for the first time.

Good luck Crafty I'm not far behind you.

Morning ladies,

Alice-The owner of our house has put it on the market for half a million (what an idiot) there is no way he will get that he has tried to sell it twice before and failed he is an oversea's person (don't want to use the other word in case i offend people) who has unrealistic expectations on a beautiful huge house that is unfinished and needs a fair bit of work and the houses around us have sold for less and they are finished with landscaping ect so we are just packing and taking our time i want to try to hang on until the end of july when we get our tax back.
And the court case is on the 20th of july but we might be able to avoid it because i have been putting my foot down when it concerns DH's ex and not letting her manipulate him we have court papers that say we have his daughter every 2nd weekend and half of all school holidays we are to get her fridays after school and return her to school monday mornings well the ex will text and say i can't drop emily off friday because i have plans it will have to be saturday and i say NO be here friday as the court papers say or not at all and then after school holidays we sometimes don't see emily for 6 weeks so when the ex texts and says i will drop emily over this weekend i say NO we had no idea when you are going to bring emily to us so we made plans to go away (i bluffed) so if you followed the court papers as you are suposed to we would no when we are having her so if you want a babysitter find someone else otherwise we want emily every 2nd weekend as the court has ordered.
And emily has started asking her mum why she wont let her see her dad so i think the ex is starting to feel guilty because she rang and said can we forget the past and just do what the court papers say and we have had emily for the last two weekends to make up for some lost time.
So fingers crossed she sticks to it and we can avoid court one less stress off my shoulders.
Or she rang the courts and found out we had a contrevention order on her and the papers were going to be served on her soon and she sh#t herself because she would get a fine and a bond.

Crafty-you will be fine with your appointment just go in there without having unrealistic expectations don't expect them to say yep you are as fertile as a 20 year old and we will have you pregnant in no time expect them to say you are at the end of your childbearing days and it will be tough but there is still eggs in there and you are still ovulating so there is still a good chance so lets give you a hand at getting pregnant as quick as possible while you still have some good eggs left even if its just U/S to track your follies and doing an IUI on the right day that will increase your chances we don't want to waste or miss any of our eggs do we.
I am looking forward to what they say and don't go in there nervous you are paying for it and it is your body and you know what you want so you go get it.

Porsche-I know hun i have those days to i feel for you we are here for you i am also in the older womens thread and some times i feel like it is so depressing i was also in the m/c thread but had to leave because there was to many BFP with all the newbies who just joined and i just lost the plot so i had to leave.

AFM-6dpo for me and couldnt give a rats rahzoo don't want to think about testing just waiting for AF to see if i made the june IVF list.
But i will say i noticed some cramping yesterday at work and i had way more than normal c/m and just feel headachey my skin is really dry and i have been going to the toilet a fair bit both ways and have lost a kilo in 2 days so i must be coming down with something.

hi everyone ,porshe-sorry,remember hope whispers to keep trying....afm-fet is on the 19th,hope everything goes okay with the thawing process now,my dr wont be there,dr mcgrath will be doing the transfer(i have never met or heard anything about him,has anyone else?)

Hi Ladies

Ferals and Matthews Mum thank you for your thougths I guess it's good to know we aren't alone. And I'm glad I have you guys to vent to because I know that you all understand. Doesn't make it any easier though does it? Hope is such a great thing to have although I have lost a bit of it over the last 3 months. I'm just about to throw the thermometer and OPK's out the window and leave certain parts of certain forums alone.

I hope your FET goes well Matthews Mum. I'll have all my fingers and toes crossed for you! I can't wait to get to your stage.

Ooh half way through your TWW Alice. I know what you mean about not reading too much into your symptoms. I really hope they mean something fantastic for you!

Is anyone with Queesnland Fertility Group?

Good one Ferrals, sounds like you have sorted that situation out with the ex - putting down very clear boundaries like that takes away all the confusion and possibility for conflict 'cause you all know what's meant to be going on and who is sticking to it and who isn't - I'm sure Emily is grateful and now she can see where the problem is too - with her Mum and not with her Dad and you. Be shame to have to have a court case for no reason - not good for any of you. Hope you're not coming down with anything serious though it's the time of year when we all start getting bugs. Hope you get on the list for June and don't have to wait til July.

Porsche, I understand what you are saying, just seems so unfair to have to keep waiting and waiting and trying and to feel like you're not getting anywhere. I've never been on Clomid but I have read in other threads women who've had problems with it, no consolation for you, I know. I hope you O soon so you can either get UTD or start your AF and get the IVF ball rolling. Hang in there x

MatthewsMum - a date, at last! Ok so 19th it is - that's less than a week now, how exciting. Fingers crossed that little blastie will be snuggling in and sticky tight this time next week! I had one transfer without my usual doc and at the time I thought it might be good just because every FS is a bit different in how they do things and you never know if it might make a difference! Fingers, toes, legs, arms, everything crossed for you. I so want to see you out of this forum and into the BB groups (with regular visits, of course :)

Sunbeam - how're you going in the TWW?

Sevie, Hubba_Bubba, Trea - how are you all? Or am I confused with the other thread?

AFM, have realised that if I were taking my temp vaginally (so if TMI), my chart would be looking much better because there is about a .2 difference - so my 36.6 would be 36.8 which would be great so I'm going to start doing that and I'm going to revise all my other charts to take in tomorrow to see if she thinks that I'm doing better. Last week I didn't go because the week before she said there wasn't much about my charts she was happy with. Talk about a great bed-side manner. Anyway, if she can help me, I'll put up with some bluntness but honestly when you are feeling a bit fragile about it all, it can really make you feel blue.

Porsche, I think we posted at the same time (and think you might have me confused with Ferrals :) ) but I'm with you on wanting to throw the thermometer out the window!!

MurryCod, I am following you in the other thread so I know how you are, just counting down the days to the scan - can't wait to hear how you go. x

Oopsie so I did.

Alice-what is your temp before you O mine is usually around the 36.3ish area then i have a dip to about 35.8-36.0 the day before i O then it rises to 36.6-36.8 and usually stays around that i might have a day or two that it hits the 36.9 but thats as high as i have seen it the last few months i took my charts to my FS and she said because it shows i have a pre O dip and when i O and i have a rise and it stays above my pre O temp that is perfectly normal she said it doesnt really matter what the temp is aslong as it is higher than the pre O and is consistant mine always drops two days before AF i havn't been doing mine this month i just don't care anymore i did my CBFM and thats it.

Mathewsmum-good luck with your embie are you thawing one or two?

Porsche-i lost all hope and even now i still don't see my DH and i having a baby together this SLO gene is going to beat us.
I will still keep trying for a bit longer but with our having trouble getting pregnant and our chances of having a sick baby i think i am fighting a losing battle:shakehead:

AFM-7dpo and i don't care just hoping the westmead ivf list has a spot for me.
DH is still blaming himself for not having taken ttc seriously and sneaking the odd smoke and redbull here and there so now he wont even have a coke he has his one coffee of a morning and it's caffine free and smoke free for the rest of the day.
I asked him when was his last sneaky smoke and he said it was march so it takes 3 months to off load DNA damaged sperm so they should be better quality by now.

Ferrals, I have a pre O temp of 36 (sometimes 35.8 a few days before) then I get a rise, but usually in two steps so it goes up once to around 36.3 then up again to 36.5-6 and that is usually day 14 and the day I O. After that it mostly stays up except for the odd drop back to 36.3. The day before AF (I have regular 28 days cycles), it drops right down. I think the problem is the dips in the second phase which I only had once this cycle and the rise this cycle was higher, and quicker, so I guess there is some improvement but what is causing those dips I don't know and interestingly they are always on day 22? I'm going to ask her about that today.

Your DH is doing so well to have not had a smoke since March. Mine just can't quit - it causes huge stress between us but when it comes down to it I don't want to split over it so I have to let it go but it really really upsets me, especially as he has seen everything I have gone through with ops and procedures to try for us to have a baby. I feel the same - like I am fighting a loosing battle. He is on the same diet as me except he still has coffee most days and probably 3-4 beers during a week. Just writing that makes me upset - I don't know if we'll ever get there either but at least your DH is really trying, I'm just sorry you have the SLO gene to contend with 'cause that's a big one. Just hoping you get enough embies to find a healthy one for your baby to come home.

The problem is, our FS keeps telling us that the problems are all mine - DH's sperm tests come back completely fine and we always get good fertilization rates, it's just my eggs...agghh how do they know if DH quitting just might not be the little bit of difference we need?.:wall: He comes from a super fertile family so I guess I have to accept I'm the dud in the equation.

Morning

Alice I don't think your a dud at all maybe you put too much blame on yourself give yourself a break woman your doing everything you can to improve your chances ! Have you ever considered donor eggs if they say yours are the problem ? I know mine are even older than yours but I still have hope and if they tell me mine are all gone or really bad then I would still consider donor eggs, DH and I started this journey of having kids 20yrs ago and used donor sperm as we were told his sperm was hardly anything and the mobility and morpholagy was so bad, we were very happy just to have a baby ! but as it turned out 3yrs after our son was born DH all of a sudden started to get me pregnant now I think apart from nature obviously making some change I think the fact it was no longer an issue with us and we were both relaxed we suddenly started to get it right !!!! Just a thought sorry if I offend !

Well 2days to go till my apt and I keep haveing really bad dreams about the DRs Laughing at me and telling me to get out there rooms and accept my baby days are over old women ! sometimes I hate my dreams !
I log on this morning to the internet to read of a 66yr old women giving birth in india to ivf triplets so hey she is 21yrs older than ME !!!! will remember to quote the story if I get any shi*

Matthews mum FX and my prayers are with you on the 19th you so deserve to get your BFP you been in here longer than me and I feel like I been in here forever !!! be calm my dear and think happy thoughts and be positive and say to yourself this is my baby and its gonna stick !!!

Ferrals how you doing I too could not give a monkeys this month have just got the AF due next week and thats that attitude not even gonna test on thurs morning whats the point it will be 1 line anyway ! I have also decided that if I get no good advice at my apt I will be calling it a day as in really trying and watching my cycle I will just Bdance when we want and thats that no contraception no desperate need to do on a certain day and no more shi**y herbs or maca !!!

Porshe know what you mean about the other thread ! went back to fine more BFPs to lucky people who been on there all of 10 mns !!! Don't worry your not alone !!! we still here with you !!!

ENjoy your day we got a wet one here in Perth !!!

Thanks Crafty, I'm hoping now my body has been pg once it knows how to do it again! I had a dream last night that we were doing IVF and I was so sure it hadn't worked and we got a second BFP so here's hoping. Hope your appointment goes well Thursday - looking forward to hearing what they say. Just remember what Ferrals said - go in there and ask for what you want, it's your body, your life, your dream, and hopefully they will be able to help. Like I've said before, I have a strong good feeling for you so let's hope I'm right one way or the other.

Alice-My DH was told his sperm was normal and actually really good with excellent motility and above average count ect but when we did our last ivf cycle our embies fragmented from day 3 the embrologist said that is from the sperms DNA not being so crash hot then my new FS said DH morphology is not to good so who do you believe just because they say his sperm is good from just looking at it doesn't mean that it is when it comes to DNA ect and like you said they are quick to blame the womens eggs but if they fertilise that is a good start from day three the sperm takes over so any problems after day 3 can be the sperm not always but a possibility.

Crafty-Dont drop your bundle just yet there is women who have fallen pregnant with their own eggs naturally up to the age of 47 just wait and see what the FS says then you can drop your bundle until then try and look at the positive side your cycles are back to normal so you are still Oing every month.

AFM-i seem to be going to the toilet a lot :think:

Hello lovelies,
I've been keeping up but not much to post. Has anyone heard from Murrycod? How's she doing?

Ferrals - I so wish I was feeling like you and not caring this month but i'm still noticing every little thing. I hope your peeing a lot is a great sign. It wouldn't be the first time someone got relaxed and stopped thinking about it and ended up UTD :pray:

Crafty - You poor thing what an aweful dream. I guess the least you will get from the appt is the knowledge about your egg count. I do understand your fears. If the eggs are there though, Ferrals is right you need to tell them what you want, they are providing a service. :crossfingers: its good news.

Alice - interesting about the temps. I haven't temped for a while but my temps pre O were 36.4 to 36.6 then they would climb steadily to 37.0 after I O. I also used to notice a dip for a day in the second half on my pg cycles not sure why. I have the same feeling about my body knowing what to do. My first pg felt very foreign and i really felt like my body had no idea what was going on, it felt much differnt the secaond time.This whole thing is so hard it's not possible to not have down times so take care of yourself :hug: To answer earlier question yes I am progesterone support which makes TWW symptoms even more confusing.

Porsche - sounds like it might be an anovulatory cycle sorry hun. I often had them even on 100mg clomid! Lets hope it does not go too long and you can get on the IVF train soon.

Mathew's mum - good luck for you transfer on the 19th :goodluck: I hope your embies thaw out perfectly :crossfingers:

AFM - not even going to talk about my symptoms, it has been proven too many times that I have no idea whats real and whats fake. I will test on thurs but thats still only 12dpo so not expecting too much. This TTW has dragged on and on! Just wanted to share that I went out to look at my angel garden this morning and a beautiful butterfly flew up from the flowering plant, it made me smile heaps.:D

:hug: Hugs to all

evening all, craftymummy-thanks,if dr is like in your dream,we will protest outside his office with our 'o' & 'wee' sticks...ferrals-thaw they one,if doesn't survive,they try another until they get one what is okay to transfer,if none survive then the transfer will obviously have to be cancelled...alice-you are certainly not a dud,just takes a bit longer for some of us,thanks for your comments regarding how to approach having a different fs doing transfer...sunbeam-what a special moment for you...porshe-thanks...trea-how are you?you in tww??..afm-on antibiotics for a sinus infection,gp only gave me a 5 day course so i'd be finishing them the day of transfer,have to ring clinic tomorrow to let them know,hope it doesn't effect transfer

Sunbean I'm still here lurking away everyday !!!! I'm sure your Angel's garden is beutifull, I'm sure the butterfly thaught so!!! Thursday isn't far away, IKWYM about time going so slow. I am waiting for my first scan NEXT Tuesday and I feel like time is going backwards.
I still have no symptoms other than the crampiness on and off, so still don't have my hopes too high. Guess I am just scared of getting my heart broken on scan day. Someone is going to have to drug me that day for sure!

Matthew'sMum good luck for the 19th!! Will be thinking of you, everything will be fine X

Alice, don't say you are a dud, but if you are referring to You having the fertility problem, well thank god for that, because men don't seem to deal with it as well as women can (that is really sexist so sorry if any boys are reading, am just speaking from experience of being a nurse for 12 years LOL)!!!
When DH and I were being tested for fertility with our new FS last year, DH became a total freak show, stressing about his Testosterone and swimmers, OMG what a performance he threw!!! When he came back 'normal' he was a happy 'man' again, like he was happy it was me and not him.....sigh....YKWIM??????? I don't think I could have dealt with him if it were him that had the issues not me. Thank god it was me I say!!!!:shhh:

Ferrals, Miss you totally all the time babe XX

I will be a bit more social once I get next Tuesday done with. Untill then I am stuck in my little bubble and staying home in the warm!!!! XXX

Love to you all XX

Hi ladies! Hope you don't mind if I join you in this thread... I know most of you from TTC after M/C or Loss thread but think its time for me to move in here with the Long Timers....

For those that dont know me, here's a little of my story.... I fell pregnant first try in June 2009, DH and I couldnt believe how blessed we were as I had watched my older sister battle with endo/ PCOS and IVF and always assumed that we would have to go down that road too... anyway our world fell apart on the 10th of Sept when we went for our 12wk scan only to see our lifeless little angel on the u/s screen, needless to say we were both absolutely crushed and shocked as we had no idea that our little baby had fallen asleep inside of me.... I have suffered from deep depression since and isolated myself from a lot of people. I find just when I have enough strength to be social, I get smashed down with another pregnancy announcement from friends and as Im sure you all understand, it hurts to damn much :(

Anyway we have been trying since Sept with no luck, we have tried all we can for this stage... chinese herbs, acupuncture, pre-seed etc... we started seeing a new FS last month and I had a lap, hysteroscopy, dye study and d & c two weeks ago... The doc found that I have Stage 3 Endo so Im hoping that was our problem and things may start to work now its been cut out but the endo was on my bowel/rectum area apparently so Im not sure if it was the problem as we dont see the doc for another 6 wks! DH has had his swimmers tested but we are still waiting for the results!

I just dont understand why things arent working after I fell pregnant 1st shot last time! I am young, fit and healthy, it just makes no sense to me... they keep telling me its stress but I have friends that have been thru the same experience and managed to fall pregnant within months of their m/c.

Anyway thats my story in a nut shell....

Hi to all the ladies that I do know... Murray, Ferrals, Alice, Crafty, Sunbeam, Matthews mum, porsche....

Hope you are all doing ok, no matter what stage you are in xx

Thopes, Huggs to you my Darling, you are so very welcome here, you already know most of us here and the girls you have not met yet, well they are great too X
This thread has not been open for very long, but the bonds and friendships that are made here are strong.
So honey welcome, glad you decided to join us X
I am still popping by, I do lurk a bit in the other thread too, but have trouble keeping up with everyone, so I made this thread my home X Hope you feel you can too X

Ferrals, I asked my FS about that after our last IVF when we got 5 grade 1 blasties by Day 3 and only one Grade 2 to transfer on Day 5 and none to freeze. The nurse coordinator told me that after Day 3 it's up to the sperm but my FS flaty disputed it saying it wasn't that simple. On one hand I want to believe him and on the other I don't. I've rung SIVF today to get the pathology results sent to us so we can take them to the TCM practitioner and see what she thinks as she says often there are problems that get overlooked (like your DH's morphology) that can be picked up by going through the pathology more carefully and not just seeing if the results fit the normal range - whatever that is.

Sunbeam, those TWWs are just like two year waits sometimes! And it is tormenting not knowing if the progesterone support is doing one thing and your body another - I really feel for you with noticing every little thing, how can you not?! Hoping for Thursday with fingers crossed x And I loved reading about your angel garden today - they are with you, always.

MatthewsMum - you made me laugh with that picture of us all brandishing HPTs and OPTs at Crafty's docs! Ah we're a mad bunch in here, thank goodness for all of you lovely women! As for the antibiotics, well it can be a REALLY good thing to be on them just before a transfer and in fact they are used at SIVF (I have only just found out) for women with one remaining tube because of possible low level infections that accompany blocked tubes etc that can have big issue with embies sticking. So nothing to worry about there at all and certainly can't do any harm anyway! Counting the days down with you

MurrayCod, Thanks for your positive take on things, I guess I've never thought about it like that before!! Hoping for the very bestest happiest news from you next Tuesday and totally completely understand your fear around it but hang in there and think of all the women in your other thread who have felt the same and gotten through it and are on their way to bringing their babies home. You can do it!

T-hope, I think MurrayCod said it beautifully (as usual!) so I'm just going to say that I'm glad you found us - you are most welcome here. I'm glad the op went well and I hope this next three months sees you moving on to the BB threads (did they tell you that after your op about the next three months being really good for TTC?). Really sorry to read about the endo being at Stage 3 and glad they got it when they did. I also had endo in that area and it can affect things with the inflammation it causes and also you would know that it sheds like the lining of your uterus every month...with no where to go...so that can cause problems so all in all, great that it is out and when you can fall pg then hopefully you will be free of it. Thanks for sharing your story with us

Porsche, any sign of AF?

Trea? Sevie? How are you both?

No news here 'cept I had the most beautiful phone call this afternoon - my god daughter wanted to tell me that her first tooth fell out (she is turning 6 in a few weeks) and my god son couldn't wait for her to get off the phone (he's 2 1/2) so he could sing me his new favourite song "I want to hold your hand" by the Beatles! Aww those kids, I love them to bits!! Absolutely made my day and made me think how lucky I am to have all the little people I have in my life.

On and PS Ferrals...all I'm going to say about the peeing is....interesting ('cause I know you're not getting your hopes up) but nevertheless....interesting :crossfingers:

Hi T-Hopes,
Glad you came to join us we are a great bunch here we are all struggling along and having a hard time and seeing the constant stream of BFP's with all the ladies who just pop into those threads just does your head in please don't get me wrong they deserve them and i am happy for them it is just painful to women who are having a hard time with getting pregnant and month after month are subjected to more disapointment this thread is good we have all been trying for a long time and we all have other issues that make things harder so i think we will all apreciate how fantastic it will be when anyone in this thread get's their long awaited and deserved BFP i hope we can offer the support you need and i am sorry to here you are struggling with depression i myself have felt at times i was slipping after the loss of Abbi i still struggle with the descion i made and every day i say to myself am i now being punished for that.
Some days it is hard to face the world if i could stay at home and hide away i would but i need to be ok for my boys if it wasn't for them i don't like to think where i would be right now

Sunbeam-not long now i hope you are the first of a lucky streak for us.

Alice-after talking about all the tempting i took mine this morning and it was 36.38:o WTF that is very low for the 2nd half of my cycle it is usually in the 36.7-36.9ish area so what is going on there maybe that would explain why i havn't had my usual pimple break out my progeterone might not be doing what it should be F#CK why did i bother? stupid me remember i don't care this month just waiting for my IVF cycle GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!.

Hi Ladies

THopes - I'm glad you found us here. The other thread was doing my head in a bit. But I think I've found my spot here lol. Thank you for sharing your story it helps to know what every one has been through.

MurrayCod - I can't wait to hear about your scan. All digits are crossed. I'll be having my IVF appointment that very same day!

Sunbeam - I agree it sounds like an anovulatory cycle to me as well. Dh is like ah well that's ok not to worry lol. Easy for him to say :P. I'm hoping you are having symptoms for a reason. I cann't not read in to then lol.

Alice - No Af hasn't arrived. I'm supposed to be due around the 26th but I don't think she'll arrive. I'lk ask Dr DeAmbrosis for something to help her come. That's assuming I don't O between now and next Tuesday.

Ferrals - I agree with Sunbeam & Alice about the peeing. It's all interesting!

Alice - No AF hasn't arrived but in saying that as I mentioned above I'm not technicaly due until the 26th according to FF anyway. I usually have a 35 day cycle but that is on Clomid. Normally I have no clue what my cycle is like. I'm just going to have to take each day as it comes because I don't know what will happen. My temps are all stable around the 30.02 - 36.11 and definately no + OPK. I might give up on them and just DTD every second day.

Ferrals, don't panic about your temp - one dip doesn't mean your progesterone is all over the place, it's when it goes up and down and up and down in the second phase that it is a problem (which is what my first chart looked like, a zig zag the whole way along). When I spoke to the TCM practitioner yesterday about the dips I've had in my second and third charts (which are much less dramatic than my first chart) she wasn't concerned at all. She said if you have interrupted sleep (which is what happened to me this month), or get a chill from a cold day, or take your temp much earlier than usual (which I had done one month) etc, it can cause anomalies. So if your other temps are around the same for the second phase (which mine are starting to be which is a big improvement) - it isn't a problem and your temps are nice and high mostly so you are OK. OK? Please don't fret over it and give yourself a hard time - your biggest hurdle is your DH's morphology (which sounds like will be much improved with all the changes he's made), you've get plenty of eggs, so if you this cycle doesn't work and you get to IVF you'll hopefully get lots of blasties and that will help with the genetic probs. xx

Hi Murrycod - thanks for dropping in I was getting worried about you. I have everything crossed for your scan on tuesday (and every scan after that :D) We will all be thinking of you. When I was really sad I had decided I would not even look at my first scans so I totally understand your fears. I'd be there holding your hand if I could.

T Hopes - welcome to our new thread. I hope you feel more at home amongst us long timers :hug:

Ferrals - stop it, you were doing really well not caring this month so don't start now!!

Porsche - just keep going anyway. I got pg the second time on cd24 and saw a chart on FF of a lady who got pg on cd65!! You just never know.

Have a good day girls