Sorry, not up to personals today. Feel like the world is crashing on me atm
Past 2 days I had beun to feel fairly confident i was actually pg. Usually i would have very strong AF cramps by now - not happening, plus I've had sore BBs and yesterday felt quite nauseus at times.
With all my other IUI cycles, this has always been a great sign and I have always done HPT around this time (12dpo). My "gut" feeling has always been right and if I think I am pg then have always been greeted with two strong lines.
Well, feeling confident, I did HPT today. NO second line. Not even a hint of a second line when I squinted!.
So I would have to say a defnite BFN for us and must be the whole IVF which is messing with my body. I know everyone will come in here and say "its to early" or "don't give up until your BT'" but i KNOW there is no chance. I have been pg 5 times and even though all but 1 were not sucessful, they all gave good strong BFP on HPT so a -ve HPT IS a BFN for me.
I am more shattered than i ever expeced to be. Had to call DH ome from work. I was sooooo hopeful for this cycle and just still in shock I guess. This year has just been bad news after bad news after bad news. I just don't know how much more I can take.
To add to that, I am stressing already about what we do next. DH thinks we should just go back to IUI and take our chances without PGD. He is worried not only b the costs, but also thinks all our embies were damaged by the testing. I can see his point given our "drop off" from 14embies and none frozen but I am also terrified of having more m/cs. Haven't got appt with FS until the end of Jan. I REALLY need some questions answered before then.
So sorry for the rant, I know everyone in here has faced failed cycles. I think I am just reaching the end of my tether at seeing our dreams slipping away faster by the day.
Hi Possums - Good to see you here on a natural cycle too.
Mels - I'm so sorry for your early m/c's, thats a terrible process to face. Hoping the insanity holds off for you as long as possible.
Tania - welcome into a natural cycle - seems to be a few of us in here going that way this month.
Meredith - No such comments coming from here. I completely believe that you know your own body well. You never know how hard any one cycle will hit home. Glad you called your DH to hold you at this time.
No news here... like some of you I am hoping like a mad woman that this will bring the much desired gift before Christmas. I am due Xmas eve/christmas day depending on what this cycle feels like doing. Much too early for nuttiness... I am sure there will be plenty of time for madness next week
bella: pregnyl: OUCH is all i can say. i did it first time yesterday and still bit sore .
kittykat: no af, fingers crossed
srose: good luck to you
possums: never know, could be christmas BFP. fingers crossed
mels: yeah the madness usually doesn't set in until week 2 i've found in the past. good luck to you TWW buddy. come on BFP's for us.
bel: Thanks so much for your support. xxoo
missmagpie: good luck, hope u had fun DTD ?!
Meredith: so sorry, but if no af maybe still hope? good luck
cuddlepie: hope everything went well for you and welcome to the TWW madness.
afm: had my shiatsu massage, it's amazing. i am a bit sore where i did pregnyl injection. ouch !
and when i broke off the tip of the vials i smashed the top of both of them ?! does anyone know if theres a trick to this. next pregnyl due on sat.
having 1/2 day off tomorrow so that'll be nice. also had lunch with dh today, a rare thing. was nice. so had a good day.
also i am talking to my baby and making her feel comfortable.
spreading some sticky dust in here to you all.
also the date they want me to do bt is the 26th DEC. hello ! public holiday. so they said to wait until the 27th. What the heck ???!!!!!.....
anyway i don't care because i am going to be pregnant and i am still testing on my birthday anyway.!
love to you all and spreading some extra sticky dust to you all !
So sorry to hear you got a BFN kitty kat. Its so hard, I understand totally about not wanting to do another stim cycle, I feel like that myself.
I had my BT today and unforunately my beta came back at 21, which means it's likely Im having a chemical pregnancy. Have to do another BT on Monday to check levels. Im utterly devastated, inconsolable right now. I was prepared for a negative result, but not this.
BEC D-im not in the TWW as im only on CD3 but i have been following your progress and praying u will get your miracle this time, feel free to PM me as I will be starting my IVF journey in the new year and would love your advice and if i can offer any support i would love to! we are a rare breed of young LTTTC so we have to stick together! I will be thinking of you and would love to know how you are going.
ME 21
DP 21-89% abnormal sperm
TTC#1 for 2 years!
one blighted ovum May 08
Urologist appointment FEB 19-HURRY UP!
BecD- I am so so sorry. I can understand how that result is so devastating. A negative is at least over and done with. Living in limbo just draws out the pain. I am praying either for a miracle baby which had a late start or for at least things to be ober quickly so you can focus on the future.
I would say between us, there is going to be a lot of kleenex used in the next few days.
Hi everyone,
I'm so sorry to hear some sad news from BecD and MeredithD (although I still hold some hope until it's all over Meredith, but I know how you feel about not knowing). You've had a run of bad luck, have you thought of seeing a counsellor at your clinic? It may help to get a bit of balance and help with your feelings which understandably have reached a near crisis point.
There's no words anyone can offer to heal the pain of that expectation and disappointment but it really does help to have the positive vibe of the girls in the TWW. We're not all out here getting pgs, we're all riding our own waves of disappointment and know a bit of how each other feels. I hope you feel support and comfort when you need it most.
Possums - I've just come off a natural cycle too - no joy but less pressure and more fun. i get the same feeling from you - Missmagpie too?!
I can't catch up and mention you all but as we do fanatically, I've read everyones posts from where I left off and I'm thinking of you and wishing you the best.
AFM - I'm trying to squeeze in my first FET (of our 5 frosties) before my clinic closes for christmas....no pressure ovaries but do your thing! I'm on a natural cycle but may have to give a quick jab on the weekend to spur on ovulation. I have my scan today to see if I have any juicy follies ready to take on my frostie. Fingers crossed, I'll be joining you on Monday in the TWW.
BTW, any ideas about transferring 1 or 2 embies and the risks of twins? I see lots of girls are putting 2 back and have come to the conclusion that I might give it a go.
Oops...I wrote my little novel on paper first and I missed a page in my note book...here's more (hee hee)
....been watching all your highs and lows. Rach and Farmgirl and our fearless moderator Dusty - so many goosebumps and tears reading about you. Congratulations and I hope you have healthy and happy pgs.
Mels, Kittycat, S'rose, Bella, JBM, Bel, and anyone I've missed, I'm thinking of you and wish you all sticky vibes.
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