My time at home is rapidly coming to an end. On the 29th January I HAVE to go back to work or lose my position. I have negotiated all the time I can to stay with Ivy and Noah.

When the NUM called to give me my start back date she made me feel like I was going to be a second rate midwife for having twelve months off, she said I was totally underskilled for my place of work. *SIGH* So why should I go back at all if I am not a valued member of staff?

Here are the good points I can come up with for returning to work;

money ( everything is tight ATM )
won't lose my skills (important when you have gone to the trouble of getting that double degree in the first place)

get to have adult interaction and be with women in labour (which I LOVE)

here are the bad points;

I lose time with my precious kids

I will only be able to do nights because DH's work are being very inflexible and we have no support (not prepared to put them in Childcare at this stage because Ivy is a sicky baby)

My house will become more bomblike as I am less likely to want to do housework whilst on ND AND looking after Ivy and Noah through the day...figure I'll be pretty tired.

Everything will have to be planned around work.

Dh and I have been discussing it this afternoon and he said I can do whatever I want, so there is no pressure from him whatsoever, it's all too hard really...suggestions, opinions, advice anyone?????