It's everything. Going to work. I hate leaving my girls.
My job. They didn't follow my instructions and now I have to try and salvage my program. And explain why the stats didnt improve. I have to rewrite the training component. I feel stressed about every aspect of my job. I used to love teaching but not any more. My replacement is pushing to stay on but the increase in hours are for me and I financially need them. I don't like how short I become with my big girl. I resent dh works long hours and I'm left running the house on my own plus work. I don't like that returning to work has made me become sad and slightly depressed. I keep hoping that its just me settling back in. I don't remember feeling this way after returning to work after dd1
I was talking with some other mums who have returned to work yesterday and we all reckoned you need to give yourself 6 weeks to get into the groove, and 6 weeks to work out how you really feel - as most of us had struggled the first few weeks but had come out the other side so to speak after about 6 weeks. Hope it is slowly getting better.


MN- What is really annoying is they are still advertising for the job they won't consider part-time for, is only a three month contract so is not like they need to make sure get the right job fit long term. I could have been working their for 4 days by now.

It is stressful, we are ok for money for a month or so due to tax return but it isn't sustainable is the problem, plus can't plan anything. Fingers crossed next week will find out if they want me back at old place. Otherwise I am giving myself till end of October and if nothing by then will have to go down to one day a week at childcare and decide not to work for the rest of this tax year. Last year I was looking October till end of Jan before found anything, so I know that is a bad period, and I can't just keep paying for daycare with no income - is just too expensive (even with the CCB/CCR). If I write off working for this tax year - we will be ok, but isn't really what I want and brings up new complications like what to do about kinder for DD - plan was for in daycare kinder but 1 day a week isn't sufficient really is it? If I manage to get her in somewhere else then I will be ok with the hours for first two terms but really would want to try get them back in at childcare for the next financial year and get some work (by that time I might be able to suck up a more full-time like role as will only be for half a year with two in childcare as DD will start 2015). Not really that keen on the idea of pulling them in and out of childcare/kinder, but if I have too then I will just enjoy the extra time will get with them.

I have to say that if the government do bring in the ability to have in home care applicable to CCB/CCR for everyone, then it would certainly make it easier for those who are in and out of work - if I could only have daycare for the times when I have contracts it would make a massive difference, and would probably save the government money because then people would be able to work and earn tax when there are jobs available to them not be dictated by keeping or losing their childcare places. Nannies or in home carers whatever they want to call them are bound to offer more flexibility than childcare centers.