what a dilemna Bec. I haven't been in that situation but have been trying to rest while doing IVF with a 4 year old. Rest assured, doesn't matter how many games someone else plays with her - you will always be Mum so don't let that worry you. and you can play games and read books and watch DVDs together while you are lying down.
As far as becoming independent so that you don't have to lift her, that is probably a little way off. Depends on what your bath is like but DD still wants me to lift her out of the bath at 4 (she could prob. do it herself but doesn't want to) and the car seat , she was probably 3.5 years before she got into and out of herself.

So it may be a toss up about going back to try now when you do need to lift her often but she is relatively light to wait a while but then she will be very heavy, and if you do have to lift her, it will be impossible. if you are on strict bed rest, you won't be going in the car anyway and you could bath her when dh is home to get over that problem. Probably best to go with your obs. advice.
good luck