Bittersweet

[~Hestia~]

It's such an emotional time

You did well, I had two friends have babies within a couple of days of when I was due, was very hard. Even now, after having Alex, I still look at their 8 month olds and think of what I lost.

[chepie]

Oh hun you did so well.... I had breakfast with some friends awhile ago who had their newborn girl with them .... she was due a week after Hugh ....... It was so very hard but I hid it well ........ They were so happy, how could I not...

Though got into the car after and cried a little!! But hey we are all human xoxo

[Miss.B]

Many hugs beautiful lady xoxoxox

[Amaunet]

It's such an emotional time

You did well, I had two friends have babies within a couple of days of when I was due, was very hard. Even now, after having Alex, I still look at their 8 month olds and think of what I lost.

Me too

[Lily Dust]

It will hurt, sweetheart and you were very brave going in there and holding your friends DD. It will get easier but you will also always remember

[Charlotte91]

OP. Wish I do more than send a hug.

[OceanPrincess]

Thanks everyone. It is so hard finding people who understand. I don't really think anyone else (including DH) has actually thought about it... ah well.

I guess that is my lot in life hey? As mum, I'm the one who will remember.

It's never going away, is it..?

[LuluHB]

My DH is a real sweetheart and pretty well in touch with his emotional side, but he has no understanding at all of how I feel. My miscarriages gutted him too, but he seems to have been able to move on from them and doesn't really see them as our babies that we never held ITMS. I don't want to make him sound cold hearted because he's not, but I think men have a different way of dealing with it all, and are far better able to sever the emotional ties.

We on the other hand know they're our babies and always will be. Doesn't matter that we never get the privilege of raising them. From my experience it doesn't ever go away, but it does get easier as the years pass. Approaching your angel's due date makes it especially raw again for you at the moment

[MummyNaomi]

Hugs OP, I imagine you had the biggest lump in your throat during those newborn cuddles. Take it easy at this time, its ok to grieve your loss a little more as your angels anniversary date draws near

[Shanti]

I don't blame you.

[Mother Goose]

I'm so sorry hon. . You are such a strong and brave person.

[briggsy's girl]

Thanks everyone. It is so hard finding people who understand. I don't really think anyone else (including DH) has actually thought about it... ah well.

I guess that is my lot in life hey? As mum, I'm the one who will remember.

It's never going away, is it..?

No, it never goes away entirely - but it changes as time goes along. Instead of feeling like your heart is being torn out, you will start to just have those - yes, bittersweet is a great word for it! - moments. Given that this bub was early, it does help a bit (or that's what i've found)

BW and I were due a day apart - i lost my bub, she didn't. When her little man was born 4 weeks early, I almost breathed a sigh of relief because I knew then that i'd not have his birthday as that reminder each year of what was missing. I still look at him and think "i should have had..." but at the same time, I look at DD and realise if i hadn't lost that bub, i wouldn't have this DD. so the pain is different

Good on you for being able to go and hold that little bubba. it's not an easy thing to do

massive hugs