Thank you so much for your replys ladies, i too am so sorry for your losses

Reading your responses gave me such a huge feeling of releif. I know i got a thank you from my brother (but he's not too good at expressing his feelings) and i was worrying that he said thank you just so as not to hurt my feelings.

I truely do feel i am doing an honorable thing for my nephew and reading your comments confirms how i feel.

I have added the foundations you have mentioned to my list of donations that i will make.

BAL i have read a book written by members of the group SANDS. I read it in the hope of being able to understand a small bit what my brother and sil may be going through. If that is even possible...

Thank you so much ladies