I thank you all for lovely, kindest words at a time when my world is falling apart. I woke up thinking I dreamt it, but no it is real.

I spent the night cuddling my two little boys. I look at their faces and realise what miracles they truly are, and wonder how did they survive in a body which cannot handle being pg? But they did and they are the only reason that I will get out of bed again. I know Im incredibly lucky to have them, I just want(ed) another.

Thankyou all for being so understanding, especially BAL who I think of every day.