And it's ruining me! I'm yelling at the kids 24/7 and just miserable.
Ever since we found out the twins are boys I've had huge fears of them passing as it is all I've known with boys
I've had stupid dreams every night since 19 1/2 weeks with different ways of them passing I wake up cold, sweaty, scared and physically sick.
Now with 3 very recent tragic passings of bubs on BB my fears have gone through the roof especially now movements are minimal I know rationally that's because of lack of space but I freak out still.
Deep down I'm being silly, I hope but what if my body is trying to tell me something and I'm ignoring it due to past experiences.
I'm sorry this post is pointless I just needed to get it out though
MrsS, your post isn't pointless at all, so please don't feel that way. unfortunately they are very real and valid feelings for you and for a lot of mothers. I understand your fear of boys, i think if i were to have another boy, i would be freaking out as well. the only thing i can suggest, is what about talking to the hospital or your GP about some kind of counselling? DH and i were talking about it last night for me now, but it just kind of occurred to me reading your post that the time i would probably need it the most was when i fall pregnant again....just an idea? other than that, i got no real advice but just massive massive xxx
I'm having the same fears. I am having a little girl and hearing about all the new angels is not helping my state of mind either. I have been constantly thinking "what if that happens to me" You are not alone in your fears. hun
aww its totally understandable that you are feeling this way. i too have been affected by the recent tragedies. i check my son soooo many times while he is sleeping. it might seem impossible,but maybe taking a little BB break until you're in a better, more positive headspace...? otherwise we are all here to listen to your worries. (which are not pointless)
I was the same way when I was pregnant with DS2. I fell pregnant with him 3 months after losing Noah. DH didn't want me to find out the gender as he felt I would freak out like nothing else if I knew I was having a boy. I agreed. I worried constantly and the midwives & hospital were brilliant in calming me. Perhaps have a chat to your midwife and tell her your concerns. Remember, if you are worried, you can always go to the hospital and have a check up to put your mind at ease.
Sending massive hugs your way hun
I can't sleep anymore
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it's understandable to be scared - your post isn't pointless at all... Get it all out 
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