Hi everyone. I'm sorry that we are all here but I hope we can all get strength & support from each other.

I apologise if I'm in the wrong thread but I really want to get everything off my chest but don't want to burden anyone who doesn't understand. When I was 21 I had my beautiful girl, there were no major complications & I ended up marrying her dad & trying for more kids. We actually got pregnant on our honeymoon! But at 12wks 4 I started spotting & was sent for u/s which showed a 9 wk bub with no heartbeat. The next day I had a d&c & 4 mths later we conceived again. The GP I saw to confirm the pregnancy was matter of fact & didn't seem to understand my fear. At 9wks I developed sharp pain & spotting & an u/s showed no baby but a lap confirmed an ectopic & I lost my left tube. I was a mess. It took its toll on my already fragile, emotionally nonexistent marriage & we split 3 mths later -19 days after our 1st wedding ann. Fast forward 10 yrs later & I'm in a much better place emotionally, with a loving partner & my DD who's 12 this week & we're TTC & I am excited but also very petrified! I want to share my life with this fantastic man & each month when I O I get excited that this might be it! but this month my heart is pounding, I feel so anxious & want to cry. We're currently in the 2ww so I have another 10 days or so of this emotional roller coaster. What happens if we do fall pregnant & the pregnancy isn't viable. I don't want that loss, that stress. I know I'm being unreasonable & that my story is nothing compared to what so many of you have experienced but I don't know how to snap out of it. Please tell me I'm normal???