Cheezles you are under no obligation to tell them why you need time off. it's none of their beez wax. Ask to get a medical certificate to cover you. The medical cert will only say you are recieving treatment. If they push for a reason tell them it's personal and leave it at that.
My DH was there to drop me off so to speak but he wasn't allowed to wait with me. My first D&C he went to work and when I was 1/2 hour away from being released they rang him and he left work to pick me up. That D&C was really hard because I had a really insensitive nurse chatting with her fellow workers about her 10 week pregnancy and how much amniotic fluid the baby was in etc... lots of deatil I'm lying in recovery after having my 10 week old baby sucked out of me and I had to listen to that.
Anyway my second D&C was pretty much the same but DH didn't go to work he hung around the hospital until it was time to get up and have something to eat.
Cheezels, as Porsche said you are under no obligation at all. Have you told them you won't be in? Or do you need to call in the morning?
If you call in, just say you are unwell and will be getting a certificate.
Just a word of warning - emotionally, I was a complete mess for two weeks after the procedure. I was fortunate (???!!??!?!) in that I was actually on annual leave for a week when I miscarried but I ended up needing an extra week off - so I told my manager what had happened.
She was great and said take as much time as I needed.
But you do not have to tell them.
As for your DH - mine stayed at home with our kids, to give them as "normal" a day as possible. Mum came in with me - you will not be able to drive yourself home nor take public transport due to the GA. Nor will you want to, I'd say.
Anyway mum waited in the reception area with me, but then I was taken in by myself, and told mum would come in when I was in my gown and ready to go. But when I started bleeding heavily, they rushed me in and mum just had to wait. She didn't get to come in to recovery, but came into the day procedure area where you go once you are out of recovery but not ready to go home yet. So she sat with me there and got me to call DH, who'd been anxiously texting her, until I was ready to go home.
Hope that helps. I'll be thinking of you tomorrow.
Cheezels, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. We went through a similar experience a month ago. I was given the option to wait to m/c naturally or go for the d&c. Since the u/s indicated the baby had stopped growing over 2 weeks earlier, I was told it could be a long wait and then still need the d&c anyway. Like you, I wanted it over so I could start to move on, so we went straight for the d&c, but we did wait 4 days to get the Dr I wanted. I told my employer I needed time off for a surgical procedure. With my history (multiple IVF and lap for endo) they thankfully didn't ask any questions.
As suggested above, I got a certificate from the OB to cover the time off work. The thing is, it had "**** Obstetric Group" written in huge letters in the letterhead. Thankfully my manager said he didn't need any supporting documentation for my leave application because that one wouldn't have left much to the imagination even though the letter itself just said I was unfit for work. I could just see someone reading the letterhead and blurting out "are you pg?". That would have gone down well... not.
Physically, I recovered very quickly from the d&c. I actually felt perfectly fine when I left the hospital that night (about 6 hours after the procedure because I fell asleep after returning to the ward) and my bleeding was manageable, although it lasted 2.5 weeks. Emotionally, I'm only just starting to get my head above water (today is exactly 1 month after the d&c). I cancelled all my obligations for the week of the d&c because I didn't know what to expect, but physically I would have been fine for all of them. I was just a basket case, so I only went to one that would have caused bigger problems if I missed it (my mum's birthday was 3 days after the d&c and we hadn't - and still haven't - told anyone about the pg or mm/c, so she would have been hurt and not understood why I hadn't gone).
My husband & DD came to the hospital with me, but left when they came to take me to pre-op. There was a reasonable wait between admission and going down to pre-op, so I was glad they were there. The hard part was waiting on my own in pre-op for what seemed like an eternity, but was probably about half an hour. DH only came back to pick me up after I was discharged because we couldn't have DD sitting around for hours waiting.
I hope everything goes smoothly tomorrow. Take care and be kind to yourself.
I'm so sorry for everyone in here's losses. Life sucks sometimes. :-(
Thanks so much! Op is today (I'm starving already and it's only 8 am). DD will come with DH and we will just see how it goes, we have lined up someone to look after her if need be. Hopefully it all goes well and is over quickly with not too many problems. I really need to move on.
Thank you everyone, I love this website! I had the surgery yesterday and already feel a lot betee about things. So sad still but just better to know it wont happen 'naturally' whilevi'm at a party or grocery shopping etc. side effects of the GA arent fun but otherwise good. Thank you all again. xx
Hello. Not sure if anyone's still reading this. When you went through your loss chezels, I was celebrating confirmation of my first pregnancy. We thought we'd been lucky and conceived quickly.
Just over a week ago, our first ultrasound showed a very small baby, with heart beating.
Last Friday I had my routine dating scan for the twelfth week and insensitively been told that my baby had no heartbeat. We were gutted. Speaking to my gp and obs, I wanted to wait for things to happen naturally, but by sunday I had cried so much and felt in limbo, we decided to go in for a medical miscarriage (misoprostal).
After 3 hours I passed my tiny little baby, after 2 hours of light contractions. 1 hour later I was beginning to pass the placenta and was bleeding heavily which was scary. The pain was mild. We went to the local emergency department and was left bleeding all over their chairs until I was last. I continued to pass the placenta which horrified me, there was so much more tissue than I had expected. I just wanted someone to tell me that I was ok. The nurses knew nothing about gaenocology (i wouldn't go back there). Finally the doctor came (not a gaeno or obs..) and she decided to remove whatever she could. I was still bleeding heavily and passing tissue. It was an awful experience. I've been tender ever since.
My bleeding is light now, but I am concerned that if I have not passed all the tissue I will have to have another round of tablets or may eventually need to have a d&c. I want to avoid it as there is a risk of puncturing my uterus.
My husband and I are having a burial tomorrow. Still dealing with the emotional side, though my body has recovered well, better than a d&c by the sounds of it. We are both home for the week, hubby has been with me every step of the way.
Well thank you for hearing my story so far, if anyone is there.
Cheezels, I'm really sorry for your loss hun. I hope you're travelling OK and I hope you've had good support around you
Mrs.holmes, I am so sad to hear news, my heart breaks you. It's such a dark place to be in. Will be thinking of you, your hubby and your precious angel tomorrow. Many hugs and I'm so sorry your little one couldn't stay
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