Timing of EDD after Loss

[Ilithyia]

I know its not even been 2 weeks since Reid's birth and part of me feels guilty for even thinking these thought already

I want to try for another baby in February. That gives me 3 months to get my body back in order.

I'm not even sure where my cycle is at given the timing of thing but assuming that I get my bleed back 28 days after Reid's birth, I've worked out that if I concieve in Feb like I want to, the baby will be due on the 20th of November. 2 days before Reid's birthday.

From what I have read in books, when trying for another baby after a loss, you must avoid the birthday of your like that plague.

What's everyones thoughts on this?

[skybie]

This baby is due about 9 days after jacks first birthday. i desperately wanted to have birthed before his day, but my body didint want to play that game. for me it would have been having something happy around a time of such sadness.
i think its up to the individual, if you dont think you'd be able to handle it, then dont do it. if you think its something you'll be able to deal with then go for it.

its not an easy decision hun, here if u need to talk xxx

[TeniBear]

Amelia was born 10 days after Ianto's birthday. In fact, on his birthday proper, I spent most of the day in hospital because she'd flipped breech and we had to wait to find out what our options were with that.

It didn't really bother me, having their birthdays so close. In some ways it makes me feel happy I have/had something happy around that time so I'm forced to not mope around, if that makes sense?

[Ilithyia]

I guess I dont really want the baby born on Reids birthday. The fact that its his birth day and the day he died I don't anything to take away from his special day.

I'm not really phased if the baby came within a week before or after his birthday just not on the day.

Its really hard to estimate without knowing when my bleed is going to come back and if its even going to be normal. So it seems kinda pointless even worrying about it but its something that I've been thinking about I guess.

Amelia was born 10 days after Ianto's birthday. In fact, on his birthday proper, I spent most of the day in hospital because she'd flipped breech and we had to wait to find out what our options were with that.

It didn't really bother me, having their birthdays so close. In some ways it makes me feel happy I have/had something happy around that time so I'm forced to not mope around, if that makes sense?

Thats perfect sense

This baby is due about 9 days after jacks first birthday. i desperately wanted to have birthed before his day, but my body didint want to play that game. for me it would have been having something happy around a time of such sadness.
i think its up to the individual, if you dont think you'd be able to handle it, then dont do it. if you think its something you'll be able to deal with then go for it.

its not an easy decision hun, here if u need to talk xxx

Thanks heaps hun
x

[Miss.B]

Hun, I'm very sorry your little man couldn't stay earth side Don't feel guilty wanting to TTC soon. I wanted to be pg almost straight after I lost Josh. I lost him in October 08, but I had to wait a few months to fix the problem that sent me into early labour, and then 6 months for my uterus to heal. The waiting time was horrible! GL TTC hun, I hope it happens for you soon xoxox

[~ Mylitta ~]

I just wanted to say that you shouldn't feel guilty for wanting to TTC again so soon. The desire for a child doesn't lessen after a loss. Wanting to conceive another child does not take away any of the pain and grief you feel over the loss of your precious son, and it certainly doesn't mean you love him any less. Our hearts have an infinite capacity to love and when you conceive your next child you will find that your heart just expands to hold all that extra love. Best of luck to you ♥

[LionsandBears]

Part of our timing conceiving DS2 was to not have the same EDD or birthday as DS1. DS1 was due late August and birn late July. DS2 was due mid October and born mid June. Assuming there's a next time, we're ignoring the timing. It didnt change our stress levels last time and it all went to hell anyway.

For us, we'll try again when the hope outweighs the fear. The timing will be irrelevant. Also, assuming we manage to get a healthy one next time, I wont be going to 40 weeks, so the timing will be different there anyway.