My DS2 (2.5yo) has a huge fear of the potty AND the toilet! He watches me, DP and his older bro & sis on the toilet, he knows wees and poos go on the toilet ... we talk about it alot (but I don't push him to sit on the toilet). He has been waking up in the mornings almost dry for a few months now (he wakes up and almost immediately does a wee in his nappy) and waits for his nappy to be changed before he'll do a poo.
When changing his nappy the other morning I asked if he wanted to do a poo on the toilet (knowing that I'd have to change his nappy again in the next half hour anyway!) and he appeared all excited and said yes! So we went to the bathroom, but as soon as I picked him up to sit on the toilet, he clung to me and wouldn't sit. I gave him a big hug, told him it was ok, and we went back to his room to put his nappy on.
We even have one of those insert seat things, but he still won't use it, he just says, "too big". I've tried the potty, but he clings to me crying as soon as he sees it ...
The fact that he is hardly wet in the mornings and that he waits til after his morning nappy change to do a poo kinda tells me he does have control over his bladder and bowel, and also that he knows when he needs to go, but he when we talk about him sitting on the toilet, he thinks it's a joke - he laughs and says "nah" (except for the couple of times mentioned above)
He saw my DD have a reward chart on the back of the toilet door which got stamped every time she went, but even that doesn't motivate him!
The other reason I wasn't that concerned and didn't want to push him is because at first, i was pregnant, then #4 came along, so I didn't want to disrupt his life too much!
I really don't know what else to do, besides sit here and wait til he's good and ready ... (and he's a stubborn little monkey!!)
This might sound harsh but when my 2 eldest were like that on the toilet I simply made them sit there.. I was calm and talked to them and held them tight and reminded them over and over they were safe and mummy is here..
It prob took a few times then eventually they were fine.. The toilet is a very scary place for some kids.. Another thing I used to do was to flush the contents on any nappy down the toilet ie poo's..
The funny thing is, he's quite happy to be in there when other people go, and to flush the toilet, but .... just not use it! but then again, my DD was 3.5 before she used the toilet!
I think I got spoiled with DS1, he TT'd himself at 18months!
The first few times with DS2 I actually sat him there with a book whilst my Dad was on the loo... and had Dad read to him! He actually had a nappy on, but it was more about getting him used to it.
THen we played a game of "upsies and downsies" to get him used to the physical aspect of sitting down on the potty and getting up off the potty. It was lots of fun.
Finally we ended up taking the nappy off and sitting down to read a book...
Otherwise perhaps a "special seat" rather than "potty"???
Have you tried him on the kids toilet in a parents room - see if he will go on a toilet that is his size? Maybe if you can get him used to the toilet first. It sounds like it is that he thinks it is too big, maybe a step for him to stand on, have his feet on might help.
I know that DS happily goes on the little toilet and potty, but still has a reluctance to go when placed on a big toilet. This is only wees for us ATM, although we got the big breakthrough on poos last night with our first potty poo
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Help, DS won't TT!
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