We also have problems about DS doing a good job. He will do it by himself at school, but sometimes ask for help here mainly because we do ther check and I think he lost confidence. The only reason I have to check is because if he leaves a bit of poo there it seems to irritate him and then I need to use nappy rash cream. I found if he squatted and then wiped it seems to hep with the arms length thing. Also giving them nappy wipes to wipe with helps as it isn't so much friction also helped.